Stone Cold
by XoShaee
Summary: Raya Stark was one of the eldest of Eddard's children. Family. Duty. Honor. Jon was family. Equipped with the temper of her aunt, the dedication of her father, and the gift of her ancestors, Raya went beyond the wall in search of her half brother. She found him... but she also found a wildling that drew her in faster than any knight in those silly books Sansa had read.
1. Chapter 1

_The harder the struggle, the more glorious the triumph. –unknown_

Raya Stark was blistering cold. She was sure she was going to freeze to death. She had grown up in Winterfell. She was accustomed to the cold, but this was something new entirely. The farther north she went the colder she was. She was an idiot for leaving the safety of the wall and an idiot she would die, but she was fine with that. If she died the cunts at the wall would tell her uncle she had gone off to find her brother, Jon Snow. She didn't understand how his "brothers" had left him beyond the wall. Some bunch of brothers they had proved to be. The only brothers Jon had were Robb, Rickon and Brann. He was an idiot to believe otherwise. Robb would have come back for him. Hell, she was coming back for him alone at that.

She shivered involuntarily and her mind shifted. Robb had gone off to war, to avenge the death of their father and he'd taken their mother along with him. Sansa was still soon to be wed to that little idiot Joffrey and Arya was missing. She'd left Rickon and Bran to fetch Jon. She knew that he couldn't very well leave the wall to help Robb, but she needed to see him and not one person telling her that the wall was no place for a girl was going to stop her. Just as not one man at the wall had been able to deter her from going beyond it.

So, here she stood, in to snow almost above her boots, her black hair pulled back in to a tight braid down her back. She'd dressed herself in some of Jon's clothes from the watch and none of the men had stopped her. She assumed it was because they figured she would die in them. She would be damned. She had pulled on three of his shirts atop her own undergarments and an over shirt along with a cloak. She had her bow and arrow with her along with a sword she prayed to the Gods she wouldn't have to use. Ghost trotted along on one side of her and her own direwolf, River took up the other side, only distinguishable by the gray patch on his chest.

She was determined to not let Jon die. She was closest to him, Robb and Arya. She loved all of her siblings naturally, but Sansa was… different and Rickon and Brann spent more time with each other or the other boys than with her. That didn't make her love them any less. She was just closest to the select three. She was sure Robb was closer to her and Jon was closer to Arya, but she'd never spited her brother because of it and Arya had never been upset with Robb. She was sure they all had their favorites. They were human after all.

Raya wasn't sure how long she'd been walking. She wasn't sure how long her lip had been involuntarily quivering or why her hand seemed to be glued to her bow and arrow. She was sure her knuckles were turning blue, but she would freeze to death before she returned south of the wall without her brother.

She remembered Robb and Jon telling her that she was far too hardheaded. She remembered her mother chastising her and telling her she was setting a horrible example for Arya and that she should be more like Sansa. Please… as if she would lie down and morph in to another version of her younger sister. Never. Her father defended her however; her and Arya. He reminded her mother that they were Starks- born of the first men. It was their ancestor Brandon the Builder that had put up the damned wall to protect the north from the white walkers. There were plenty of ways she'd imagine herself dying; during child birth or on a battlefield but she had not once thought that she would freeze to death. She was born of the first men and snow was in her blood. She was bred to survive the cold. She pulled her cloak tighter around her.

She had been walking for Gods knew how long. She had seen quite a few sunrises. She napped during the day and walked during the night. She refused to freeze in her sleep. She walked through the darkness even if she couldn't see specifically where she was going. The men of the night's watch had pointed her in the right direction hopefully and she had continued on that path. Either she would reach Jon or she would reach forests or mountains. She would reach something… hopefully before something reached her.

She thought about warging but knew her body wouldn't survive being left in the conditions surrounding her. She'd spent a total of two name days with the Reeds at Greywater Watch, her thirteenth and fourteenth and they had helped her come to term with her "condition", a secret that stayed within the family. Upon her return to Winterfell she hadn't been able to practice regularly but she had in fact practiced her warging- sometimes on the direwolves that roamed the halls and sometimes on a few random ravens. It would be useless to do so now however, if the outcome was her returning to a body on the brink of death.

Ghost and River paused and Raya stopped in her tracks. She watched them circle around each other and then they started to walk quickly in another direction. River had never proved wrong before. Raya pushed forward. The snow that had wedged itself on to her was at home in the cold. It was so cold the snow hadn't melted against her and she didn't know if she should have been thankful for that or bitter. Ghost gave out a whimper and then sped up. Raya turned her walking in to a slight jog. She couldn't feel her legs. River fell in stride beside her.

She thought she was seeing something, but there was a chance her blue eyes were betraying her. She didn't stop however. She simply drew her arrow and bow as she went. Ghost broke in to a run then and Raya followed suit. It took everything in her to not fall over her feet and then she heard him. She heard her brother.

"Ghost?"

"Jon!" Raya yelled and then she propelled herself harder than she ever had.

Jon changed his stance a little to catch his eldest sister as she flew in to his arms.

Jon fell to the ground and River growled after the wildling girl that had taken off running through the snow.

 **A/N: I don't know if I'm going to continue this or if it was just a drabble, but thank you for reading this through if you did. I just wanted to write a fic about either OC/Theon, OC/Robb or OC/Tormund and I leaned towards Tormund for some reason.**


	2. Chapter 2

_Doubt everything. Find your own light. –Buddha_

Raya took her in the wildling girl before her and quickly assessed the situation. She cursed under her breath and pushed her brother back, quickly pulling a new arrow free.

Raya nocked her bow.

"Don't shoot her!" Jon shouted.

He stepped in front of his sister and she stomped.

"Damn it, Jon!" Raya looked at River, "Take her out, boy."

She brushed past her brother and took off after the girl, River in front of her and Ghost and Jon behind her. Adrenaline. That's what she was feeling. It was coursing through her veins.

"Subdue her!" she shouted and she wasn't sure if she was yelling to her direwolf or her half brother.

She could see the girl before her, red hair like Sansa's flying around her. Raya paused took aim and shot in to the snow beside her.

"Stop!" she shouted.

"That won't work!" Jon told her as he ran past her.

Raya took a deep breath and began running again.

"River!" she pleaded.

Her wolf seemed to decide he had made her wait long enough. He ran faster, his teeth out. He snarled. He picked up speed and then he leaped… knocking the girl on to her stomach.

Raya quick sent an arrow beside her head as a warning shot. River made himself comfortable standing on her back. He was still snarling as if she would prove to be a snack.

Jon reached her first.

When Raya and Ghost skidded to a pause Jon was yanking the girl to her feet, River seated beside the two of them.

"Ygritte, my sister, Raya. Raya this is Ygritte."

"Ygritte," Raya tasted the name on her tongue, "Why are you traveling with Ygritte, Jon?"

"I-" he took a deep breath and turned her away from him, beginning to retie the rope he'd used to tie her hands together, "I couldn't just kill her. She's a woman."

"As am I," Raya stepped around Jon and Ygritte and collected up her shot arrow, "and if I jumped on the battlefield against any other knight I very well may not have a head on my shoulders."

She looked at the arrow closely before putting it back in her quiver with her bow.

"I'm not any other knight," Jon spun Ygritte back around, "I'm not a knight at all."

"Of course not because if you were you would be with Robb and not out gallivanting with the knight's watch and damned free folk," Raya bent down and scratched River's head.

"Can we focus on not freezing to death my darling sister?" Jon cast a look at her.

"No," she said calmly, "I need to nag you as much as possible before we die."

"And to think I almost missed you."

"Pity."

Raya stood back up and grabbed Ygritte by the upper arm opposite of the one Jon was holding.

"My brother has an issue with killing women. As a woman, I do not," Raya dug her nails in to the fur sleeve of Ygritte's clothing, "If you touch my kin I will shoot you down."

Ygritte scoffed and Jon sighed but said nothing. He instead walked up to the front and began to lead Ygritte by the rope tied around her. Raya let herself fall behind them. If Jon would take up the lead, she could take up the rear.

They began to walk in one direction without as much as a word. They did that sometimes. They made decisions without having to publicize what they were thinking. Raya felt like she and Jon worked good together.

They walked for a little. They walked and Raya took in the mountains. They walked and Raya thought. She thought about Robb and her mother out there at battle. She thought about Sansa and Arya in King's Landing doing Gods knew what. She thought about Bran and Rickon huddled up together without guidance. She thought about the chances that she and Jon would freeze to death. She was fine with them. She had found her brother. She had found her brother and that was all that she'd wanted… for him not to die alone.

"I'm tired of walking," Ygritte said in to the silence.

"And you want us to hop, skip and jump to make you comfortable?" Raya snapped.

"Raya!" Jon called over his shoulder.

"You think you're better than me?" Ygritte accused.

"Excuse me?"

Raya sped up and grabbed Ygritte by the shoulder, spinning her around.

"I said you think you're better than me!" Ygritte repeated louder.

"Raya," Jon paused and closed in on the women.

He was pissing her off. She couldn't understand why he was simply calling her name as if Ygritte hadn't initiated conversation or as if she were supposed to shut up and bow down to the wildling girl.

"I think that we're in this mess because of you!" Raya said as if it was the most obvious answer in the world.

"No! We're in this mess because your crow brother and his friends slaughtered my men."

"And how many men have those men slaughtered on their own?"

"Both of you-" Jon was cut off.

"At least I'm a free woman!"

"A free woman?" Raya scoffed and motioned to Ygritte's rope.

"I might be the crow's prisoner but I'm a free woman!"

"If you're my prisoner you're not a free woman," Jon sighed attempting to sedate his sister, "That's what prisoner means."

"Shut it, Jon! I don't need a mediator," Raya crossed her arms over her chest.

Jon ran his hand along his face. He hated when she got like this.

"So you think you're free?" Ygritte turned to Jon, "You swore some stupid oath and now you can never touch a girl."

"It was my choice to say the words!" Jon snapped.

"So you don't like girls?"

"Of course I like girls."

"Why does it matter if my brother likes girls?!" Raya screamed.

She stomped away from the both of them. They were infuriating. The wildling girl was obviously too damned self-righteous and her brother constantly defending her was making Raya want to grab him by his curly black hair and throw him in to the snow.

"So why did you choose to never touch them?" Ygritte continued.

"That's the price you pay if you want to be a man of the knight's watch!"

Raya could tell her brother was getting angry. She took slight pleasure in the fact.

"So instead of getting naked with a girl you prefer to invade our lands and-"

"Invade YOUR lands?" Jon was screaming now, "Wildlings raid our damned lands all the time! Some of them tried to kill our little brother. How noble is it to kill crippled boys?!"

"They're not. Your. Lands!" Ygritte screamed back, "We've been here the whole time! You lot just came over, put up a big wall and said that it was yours!"

Raya's skin tingled and she could see her brother fighting with some inner conflict. She closed in on the two of them again.

"Our father was Ned Stark," She said from where she stood behind Jon and looking at Ygritte over his shoulder "We have the blood of the first men. Our ancestors lived here the same as yours."

"So why is your brother fighting us?"

Silence.

Raya placed a hand on her brother's shoulder and he visibly relaxed his tense shoulders a little.

"You still look alive to me," Raya said quietly.

She grabbed the rope from Jon and Ygritte started to walk again without having to be told. Jon took up the back without having to be asked, River and Ghost beside him.

"So do you think us savages because we don't live in stone castles?" Ygritte questioned although she got no answer, "We can't make steel as good as yours. It's true but, we're free. If someone tried to tell us we couldn't lie down as man and woman we'd shoot a spear up their ass."

Raya chuckled.

"Raya," her brother warned.

"It's true, girl," Ygritte continued, "We don't go serve some shit king who's only king because their father was."

"No," Jon said, "You serve Mance Rayder the king beyond the wall."

"We chose Mance Rayder to lead us."

Ygritte paused and Raya stopped as soon as she tugged on her rope. Jon sighed. He couldn't recall her being this talkative before Raya had stumbled upon them. What was worse was that Raya seemed to be enjoying the words coming out of the girl's mouth.

"He was a crow same as you," Ygritte turned to Jon, "but he wanted to be free," she paused, "You could be free two- the both of you. You don't need to live your whole live taking orders from old men," she offered Jon a small smile and then turned to Raya, "or being forced to marry them. Wake up when you want to wake up. Just enjoy the streams to fish and use the woods for wood. Build a cabin and find a mate to lie beside in the night."

Raya looked at the girl and then to her brother. He was standing close to Ygritte. He was thinking. Raya knew Jon. She knew Jon like she knew her own mind. He was fond of this girl. He was fond of her and Raya had to admit she was fond of her ideals.

"Walk," Jon said suddenly and turned to his sister.

"Would your people welcome me?" Raya asked Ygritte.

Ygritte smiled.

"You're not meant to be beyond the wall," Jon closed in on his sister, "Your place is on the other side with our family, our sisters and brother and your mother. You can't give that all up. You're meant to be a noble women of a high house, not run wild."

"I'm already wild," Raya handed Jon the rope in her hands.

"They can't be trusted, Raya. If they say they'll welcome you, they're lying. You aren't one of them and I doubt they'll trust outsiders. I know that it seems fine out loud, but it isn't that great on paper."

"You don't know that. Mance-"

"I know that," Jon shut his sister off and started walking away again.

"You know nothing, Jon Snow!" Ygritte called.

Raya scoffed.

Ygritte was right. Jon knew nothing. There was life beyond the wall. They were born of the first men. How could she not be prepared for something in her blood? She could be a free woman. She wouldn't have to play the game of thrones. She wouldn't have to bend a knee to Joffrey or any other king that was in fact no king at all. Ygritte was right. They didn't choose their king. Kings were born no matter how horrible at the job they had proved to be. And she was a women. Her choices were limited. Raya thought about the possibility of life beyond the wall. She wouldn't have to bear children for a fat, ugly husband just because his last name was one worthy of a 'Stark girl'. She would be free to warg and use greensight without fear of persecution. Why couldn't she live beyond the wall? Jon could take the black and leave the family, but if she thought about taking on a life of her own she was selfish and meant for more. Raya looked down at River letting her eyes stay focused on his shallow footsteps. It kept her calm.

"I would die before I let you run off with people that could turn on you," Jon said quietly.

"Jon," Raya stole a glance at him, "Where are your brothers of the Night's Watch?"

Ygritte scoffed and Jon tugged her a little harder.


	3. Chapter 3

" _Somehow, we'll find it. The balance between whom we wish to be and whom we need to be. But for now, we simply have to be satisfied with who we are." ― Brandon Sanderson, The Hero of Ages_

To say that Raya could tell how upset she'd made Jon was an understatement. He walked as far as the rope around Ygritte would allow him to. He was quiet and distant, obviously in thought. Ghost had fallen in beside the younger Stark knowing that he could still see Jon from beside her and River. Raya wasn't the least bit worried about Jon's temper. He was forgiving. She knew that her brother loved her. She also knew that he genuinely wanted her to be happy even if he had no idea what it was that would make her that way. She knew that he thought he was looking after her best interests. He wasn't. The men in her life always attempted to know what was best for her. Only her father had ever succeeded.

It was Eddard Stark that had noticed his eldest daughter could warg and use green sight. He had been the one to set up her living with the Reeds. He had sent her off to live in the swamps and marshes and she had loved every moment of it. If the Reeds had a son that could produce heirs Raya would have readily joined their family. She had no such luck. She had spent only two name days there before her mother had sent for her, despite her father's less than positive thought of the situation. Eddard had found his daughter to be striving where she was. Catelyn however, wanted her children all together and so Raya had been snatched from the middle of the Reed's lands and dragged back to Winterfell.

She had been returned to her home where her arrows had been traded for sewing needles. Her family had taken her return home well. Robb and Jon had been happy to see her. She had challenged them with the arrow and bested them every time. They easily beat her out at other things however; Robb with games of the mind and Jon with a sword. They were opposites that way- her two brothers. Robb had always been an excellent strategist and he was proving that now, never losing a battle to the Lannisters. Jon had been the better warrior and now he had sworn that service to the Night's Watch.

Raya had returned home to her younger brother who had bombarded her with questions. Bran was more like Robb. Bran excelled in the academics. He read quite a lot. Raya could see him becoming a maester, but he swore he would be a knight instead… until he'd lost his ability to walk anyway. Bran had wanted to document his sister's use of her 'gifts' and Rickon who had only celebrated 5 name days was just excited to have another sibling.

Raya's return to Winterfell had affected each of her sisters differently. Arya hadn't cared one way or another if Raya could warg, but when she'd told Arya of how the Reed girl was practiced in different weapons Arya had lit up at the thought. She'd been ecstatic to even hear about the notion and then their sessions of battling each other had hatched. Sansa, however, was disgusted at the thought of her sister baring swords or working on what she considered war materials. Raya's need to warg and her unapologetic way of showing out when with her brothers after her return had simply drove a bigger wedge in between Raya and her younger sister. Sansa couldn't understand why any girl of noble birth would wear trousers like the boys and run about like some sort of savage when she should have been learning. She thought Raya too loud and too masculine and a horrible influence on young Arya. Raya felt similarly about Sansa. She thought her too submissive and much too invested in pretty, shiny things. Raya thought the things that Sansa focused on trivial. In her opinion, the things Sansa held dear would never help her in the real world. What had sewing and knowing the history of the seven kingdoms done to protect the head of their father? Nothing. Yet, being trained in sword and arrows could stop much more than knowing when to address someone as a lord or sir and knowing how much wheat the household needed for winter.

Before Raya's departure Catelyn had tried to push her two eldest daughters together with no avail. As they aged their gap got larger and Sansa partially closed herself off. She thought herself the outcast once Raya and Arya began to show how similar they truly were. Arya was a natural with a sword and Sansa cursed the Gods for gifting her with yet another savage sister. She was always attempting to correct them and they were somehow always ganging up on her. Raya didn't intend to. She honestly didn't. She related better with Arya and therefore saw things in her perspective. That didn't mean that she liked Arya more. Catelyn had tried to explain that to her middle born girl but had failed and eventually given up. She attempted to get Raya and Arya to focus more on tasks befitting of ladies. Eddard defended their hardheadedness.

After Raya's return she couldn't be bothered with Sansa's feelings or much of her mother in all honesty. Raya had returned a more mature young lady and the one thing she despised more than being counted out because she was a girl and Sansa's attempts at changing her in to all a proper lady should be was her mother's treatment of Jon. She hadn't noticed it before; a subtle look at Ned or the rise of her lip when Jon said certain things. She definitely noticed them now however and it caused her and her mother to bump heads which only added to Raya and Sansa bumping heads. Raya had taken to thinking her mother selfish. It was Catelyn Stark who had treated her husband's son as an outcast. It was she who had taken Raya from the Reeds because she wanted to feel like a good mother. Catelyn wasn't particularly a bad mother- not at all. She was simply not the best person… but she was human and Raya chalked her faults up to that. While she would never be as close to her mother as she had been in early childhood she understood that her mother hadn't married them off young or sold them to the highest bidder or sent her off to live with the religious. She had genuinely tried. Raya understood she was the second born. Her mother was still figuring things out. She was a far better mother by the time she'd gotten to Arya. That was what mattered- that she had learned from her mistakes. She was loving. She wasn't a particularly good listener and she felt that rules were to be followed and not bent.

Easily to say, Raya was a daddy's girl same as Arya.

Eddard Stark was stern. He was stern with a purpose. He understood that there were rules. They were outlined carefully as was the punishment for not obeying them. His children understood that he disciplined them because he loved them. He explained why things were the way that they were. If you broke a rule he would speak to you. There were open lines of communication. After the conversation it wasn't unlikely to still be punished, but you now had insight on why. He was slightly more lenient with his girls… almost to a fault actually.

Raya cast a look past Ygritte and at Jon who was focused on something besides the task at hand.

She rubbed her hands together, attempting to keep her fingers warm, closing off her memories in the process. If she ended up having to shoot her bow, she wanted her body to be as prepared as possible.

"So," Ygritte turned to her, "Has your brother always been this much fun?"

"Yes," Raya said shortly, "He's like our father when it comes to rules."

"Your father? The great Eddard Stark I keep hearing about?"

"The same."

"What would your father say if he found out you were thinking of living beyond the wall?"

"Nothing," Raya fell in stride with their prisoner, "I can't imagine people without heads say much of anything."

"Beheaded by the fat king?" Ygritte questioned.

"He was close friends with the fat king. He was beheaded by the fat king's son, the idiot king."

"For treason?"

"For being a just and right man."

"Naturally," Ygritte scoffed.

"Naturally," Raya repeated crossing her arms back over her chest.

"What of your mother?"

"She lives, breathes and mourns."

"While two of her children are beyond the wall."

"One," Jon called without looking back, "of her children."

"Ah yes. Jon is a Snow."

Raya rolled her eyes at the word.

"Jon is a Stark," she corrected automatically, "Eddard Stark's blood runs through his veins. He isn't a damned Tully, but he is of the first men."

Ygritte looked at Raya and smirked. She liked Raya. She was different. She reminded her a lot of herself.

"We don't label our people that way," Ygritte shrugged.

Jon paused causing Ygritte to all but bump in to him from behind. He turned around to face her.

"Stop trying to fill up my sister's head with your silly ideals, girl!"

"I'm informing her. That's more than you've done for her, crow," Ygritte leaned in to him, "Speaking of informing I can teach you some things too if you'd like."

"What things," Jon growled, "could you possibly teach me?

"How to be with a girl of course," Ygritte said and then she laughed.

"Shut up," Jon rolled his eyes.

Ygritte's head hit his and he automatically shuffled back a few steps as she took off for the second time since Raya had joined their party. She had head-butt him. She had hit Jon square in the nose with her forehead. Raya was after her instantly, River and Ghost watching Jon as he closed his eyes in an attempt to get his ears to stop pounding.

Raya ran up the slope the ground had caused, her eyes darting quickly both ways. She had no River. She counted on his nose as much as he did. She scanned the area as she walked slowly forward. What would happen if Ygritte reached her people? Raya sighed. Jon had let his emotions deter him from effectively keeping their prisoner. She pushed stray hair out of her face, took another step and then was on the ground.

Raya fought against her attacker until it dawned on her.

She wasn't being shaken or hit. There was no blade to her throat. She was on her back in the snow, Ygritte sitting on the bottom half of her body and holding her hands over her mouth. Raya shook her head wildly side to side.

"Be still," Ygritte growled.

She jerked her head to the right and Raya realized that Ygritte was not alone. She was with men, two that Raya could see.

Ygritte had led them in to a trap.

One of the men whispered something and Ygritte got up, dragging Raya with her. Raya swore she could hear Jon calling her name and then she saw him- River. She looked at him, her sweet companion and without being called he stilled and looked in her direction. Raya paused, took a deep breath and then collapsed as her eyes rolled in to the back of her head.

Ygritte saw it. She saw it happening but had no way to stop it.

She took the girl beside her in.

Raya was a slightly short girl swallowed in all black fabric that looked bigger than her frame. Her braid looked looser, stray strands embracing her face. Her hands were clasped together in front of her body. Her mouth was slightly ajar. Her eyes were rolling in to the back of her head and she was swaying back and forth on her feet slightly.

Ygritte closed a hand tightly on the girl's upper arm and watched Jon Snow pause and look at the direwolf, the one with the white patch on its chest. The door whimpered and then looked at her. Jon's gaze followed it. She smiled and waved smally.

"You should have taken my offer!" Ygritte called with a smirk.

Jon set up the slope towards her and she whistled, a short, basic tune and he paused as the men hidden in that certain area began to rise from their camouflaged places in the snow. There were nearly 20 of them and Jon Snow took a deep breath before nodding once.

He said something that she couldn't hear and then Raya jerked slightly beneath her grip before her blue eyes returned to normal. She took a deep breath and met the gaze of Ygritte who scoffed. Ygritte turned to one of the men near her.

"Watch this one closely," Ygritte said, her eyes focused on Jon as four of the men closed in on him, "She wargs."

Raya crossed her arms over her chest. She had attempted to warn Jon. She hadn't been fast enough. She hadn't known how many men were in the mountains. She had underestimated the wildlings. She wouldn't be doing so again.


	4. Chapter 4

_Family is not an important thing. It's everything. -Michael J. Fox_

They were separated. Raya was pushed and pulled along by Ygritte and a man while Jon was dragged along, the rope that had been tied around Ygritte now around him. They had tied up the dire wolves. They had tied them extremely tight… to the point where River had yelped and Raya had sent her head in to that of the nearest man and growled at them to loosen them. River and Ghost were both being carried, their mouth roped shut and to the rest of them. River seemed calm however. He fed off of Raya and she was calm. She was calculating. She was thinking.

For the first time in many moons, Raya Stark had no plan.

She focused on her feet. She tried to think of what Robb would do. She stole glances at her brother every 20 steps just to make sure he wasn't drifting away or being beaten. He wasn't. He was deep in thought however. It was evident in his face. While she looked down and focused on her footsteps, Jon's head was tilted to the sky, the sun hitting him across the face. He looked… warm. Yeah, that was it. He looked warm despite how cold it was.

Raya was irate.

Her slight irritation bloomed in to full out fury and then dwindled in to subtle submission all before the wildling camp came in to view. She took a deep breath and licked her chapped lips. She would soon be faced with the wildling leader no doubt. She would be judged for what she had which had honestly been nothing. She had held Ygritte hostage for a little, sure, but she hadn't killed any of those men Ygritte had spoken of. She knew it wouldn't matter to them. She also knew that she would gladly die beside Jon. He was her blood, her kin. She would stand beside him right or wrong. She knew that.

They dragged her and Jon in to their camp. Raya was aware of the way Jon was looking each way quickly. He was taking everything in. Of course he was. He was always the warrior. She decided to do the same and quickly took in what she could. It wasn't much in all honesty.

"I brought you a present, Lord of Bones!" Ygritte called.

The men nearest to them stopped and turned to take the new hostages in. Raya stood up a little straighter. Jon cast a look in her direction, a subtle reminder not to do anything idiotic. She got it loud and clear.

The man Ygritte had called Lord of Bones was a tall one. He was wearing the same heavy animal furs from game that Ygritte was wearing, but bones decorated his face. Raya knew at once that, that meant that he was of a Frozen Shore tribe. She had done her homework on the wildlings.

"I already have one crow," he cast a look behind him before closing in on Raya and Jon, "I don't need two and a…" he looked Raya up and down, "girl."

"Mance will want to question this one," Ygritte gestured to Jon, "and the girl is an ally."

"An ally in chains?"

"An ally in chains," Ygritte repeated, "but he knows where all the crows are and what they're planning."

"The old man knows more. This," he gestured to Jon, "This one is just a little boy. Gut him!"

Raya made a move to step in front of her brother and was yanked away by her arm. River growled.

"He could have killed me half a dozen times!" Ygritte snapped.

"Well now he wishes he had," The Lord of Bones watched three men close in on Jon and grab him by both of his arms and easily drop him to his knees, "Gut him!"

"He's the bastard of Winterfell; Ned Stark's son!" Ygritte defended.

The Lord of Bones paused and took in Ygritte and then Jon and Raya.

"Mance will want him," she repeated.

"And her?" he gestured to Raya.

"Ned's daughter," Ygritte cast a look at her, "She wants to be a spearwife."

The Lord of Bones laughed a loud hearty laugh and some of his men joined in.

"A spearwife? Her?" he pointed to her, "She wouldn't survive a day in our camp."

"Free me and find out," Raya snapped, "I can hear you!"

"She has a fire. I'll give her that. But skill I can't be sure of," he turned his head away from her, ignoring the fuming he knew she felt, "And what would Mance want with a dead man's bastard?"

"I don't know," Ygritte admitted, "but I think he would like to decide for himself."

Mance closed in on Ygritte. He lifted a hand to her and made a quick gesture. The men beside Jon lifted him back to his feet.

"If he runs I'll chop his balls off."

"If he runs I'll do it myself," Ygritte shrugged.

"And if she runs," he pointed to Ygritte, "I'll have her shot down. I would never chase her."

"She won't run either."

The Lord of Bones and Ygritte glared at each other. Raya took in her brother. His face was blank, emotionless. She knew he was thinking of a plan. She was as well. They needed to fake it. Ygritte had set up her backstory for her. Raya knew that she wasn't that stupid. She had done it on purpose. Ygritte was an ally. She had just proved it.

Her help wouldn't be wasted. Raya needed to prove that she wanted to be a spearwife. She needed to be welcomed in. She could save herself and her brother. She would do whatever it took.

Ygritte grabbed Jon's rope and pulled him along as she closed in on Raya. She looked at them both in turn.

"We're even," she said finally, "Behave yourself. I can't save you, Jon Snow."

Before Ygritte could finish completely men were grabbing Jon and leading him away. She watched them drag him a little off and kneel him in front of the other crow. She looked at Raya. She really looked at her.

"Do you really want to be a spearwife or were you just trying to befriend your prisoner?" she finally asked.

"I want to be free," Raya confessed, "but I could never betray Jon. I could never hurt him. I could never stand by and watch him get hurt."

"We wouldn't ask you to, girl," Ygritte looked around the camp and took a deep breath, "If I cut you free and you run you will be killed."

"I'm not leaving my brother."

"And stay away from your beast or your beast will be killed. Do you understand?"

"I understand?"

"Good. Come along."

Ygritte grabbed Raya by her shoulders and started to lead her further in to the camp.

X

Jon was knelt before Qhorin. He was tall, clean-shaven and the second in command of the Night's Watch. Jon sighed and took in the man before him. He looked tired and dirty. He was knelt there in the snow and he was looking at him. Qhorin was looking at Jon and Jon knew that he was an idiot. He should have just killed the wildling girl. He hadn't. He always had to do the noble thing. He was no damned nobleman.

"I couldn't do it," he admitted aloud all the same, "I had the sword to her neck, but I just-"

"I know," Qhorin cut him off.

"The others?" Jon implored of his brothers.

"We came back looking for you after that sister of yours left the wall. We were worried about you and her. What sort of men would we be if we let a little girl off in wildling territory on her own? We couldn't find her foot steps fast enough. They found us before we could find either of you."

"So…" Jon licked his cracked lips, "They died because of me?"

"They died because they chose to come back this side of the wall. Don't let it be for nothing."

"I-"

"Come on!" a wildling grumbled, "On your feet!" he yanked Qhorin to his feet.

Another set of men yanked Jon up to his. He was already tired of the up and down; to his knees, on his feet, down again and yanked back up again. He was growing bored with the whole thing, but he hadn't gotten a full proof plan through yet. A small group of wildling tied Jon and Qhorin together as the rest of them began to clear the camp. He watched. He watched the way they moved and spoke to each other and he scanned the crowds for his younger sister.

He couldn't find her.

He scanned and scanned, but could not find her.

The camp had cleared and his stomach was knotted by the time they began to drag Jon again. He let them. He was dragged before a good number of the men and as he started to reach the front he saw her. Raya. Her black hair had been freed from its braid. She had changed. She was wearing wildling clothing. Her hands were tied before her and the string was tied around the waist of Ygritte, but her clothing had been changed and Jon wasn't sure how he felt about it. He was thankful that she was seemingly okay. She looked like she was treated well and not beaten. He was still concerned however. He was concerned that his darling sister was really turning on him.

"Raya," Jon spoke her name quietly and let it die in the air.

"It was cold," she said simply, "I had to be prepared, dear brother. After all, winter is coming."

Jon resisted the urge to smile. She was fine. She was in there. She was still his sister. She had used their house words. She was a Stark. She may have dressed the part of wildling, but she was Tully loyal through and through.

Jon nodded once before Ygritte grabbed Raya by the hand and led her further ahead of them. Jon watched her go. Ygritte seemed to be taking pretty good care of his sister. He was glad he hadn't beheaded her.

"Mance is going to march on the wall," Qhorin hissed, shaking Jon from his thoughts, "When he does one brother inside is only worth a thousand fighting against him."

"They'll never trust me," Jon hissed back.

"They might if you and Raya do what needs to be done."

"What?" Jon didn't like the sound of that.

"Raya is already befriending them, Jon. Don't make your sister do all of the work. Even if she has a better plan the men on the wall will never follow a woman."

"What do I need to do?"

"How does it feel to know that great men died so that you could skip through the snow with that little savage girl!?" Qhorin yelled.

Jon paused and was slightly taken aback when Qhorin pushed him in the chest. The line of wildlings had all paused. Jon looked quickly around. He could see Raya walking quickly towards them, Ygritte in tow.

"I should have known better than trusting a traitorous bastard!" Qhorin pushed Jon again and this time he slid in the snow, slightly down the hill.

"Keep your damned hands off of my brother, crow!" Raya jogged quickly the rest of the way and pushed Qhorin before sliding slightly down the edge to help Jon up.

The Lord of Bones grabbed Qhorin by the top of his arm and spun him around.

"He isn't yours to kill, crow," he growled.

Raya helped Jon up the small slope and they were both aware of the eerie silence.

"Your only brothers are the ones our father gave you," Raya snapped, "It would do you well to remember that."

She turned her back on her brother and headed back towards the front of the line. The Lord of Bones shook his head.

"We keep moving!" he called.

The men began to walk again and Jon fell in line. Qhorin was setting him up to earn their trust the same way Ygritte had. Jon couldn't mess this up. He sighed. He had many long days and nights ahead of him.

X

Jon wasn't sure how long they'd walked. He'd long ago lost sight of his sister. He knew she was fine however. He did have sight of River and Ghost. Neither of them were upset. River could sense Raya. There was no way she was in distress and he didn't know. It just wouldn't happen. He was also aware of the way he and Qhorin had drifted towards each other. He hadn't intended to. He was just focused on not freezing to death. Jon was also aware of the fact that although Raya was ahead of them by men and men and men, Ygritte had fallen in line behind him. She was poking, prodding and irritating him to no ends.

"We should be there by sundown," she announced, "It won't be a good night for you though," she chuckled, "Mance knows how to make crows sing," she hit Jon in the back of his head with a stick, much like the one he had seen the Lord of Bones with, "If you know what to say, you might just make it through the night."

She hit him again and Jon winced and jumped automatically.

"Not talking is not the way to go," Ygritte snapped.

She hit him again.

"Careful with that," he bellowed, "You might cut yourself."

Ygritte lunged for Jon and he ducked beneath her arm, a pretty great feat for someone bound and not facing her she noted. Her mood had hit rock bottom. He pressed buttons for her that only he could. She had never met anyone as damn infuriating as him.

"Or even worse you may upset your new found friend. Does my sister know you're beating on me?" He chuckled.

Ygritte closed in on Jon, her sword pulled back to strike. The Lord of Bones had automatically paused and with him, the other men.

Raya noticed. She noticed and she knew it had to be her brother. She jerked her hand from the man holding her rope and started to push her way through the wildling men between her and Jon. She heard a shout and pushed harder, while walking faster.

When she broke in to the clearing Qhorin was charging at Jon with a sword. Jon was easily dodging the attacks. She looked at the nearest wildling and closed in on him as he watched the fight before him. Raya quickly head but him and grabbed his sword. Her brother would not fall in front of her.

Qhorin hit Jon and he fell in to the snow. Raya cursed under her breath and started to stalk forward.

She was grabbed by two wildling men and she screamed in frustration. Men grabbed Qhorin and pulled him away from Jon. He was yelling and kicking as Jon just looked up at him, obviously in shock. Qhorin spit in his direction.

"I will kill you!" Raya yelled kicking her legs and flailing to no avail.

"Let them fight!" The Lord of Bones snapped.

Ygritte threw her sword on the ground beside Jon and quickly made her way to Raya.

"You can't fight his battles, love."

"Oh I can!' Raya seethed, "and if he needs me to, I will."

"A great spearwife," Ygritte scoffed towards The Lord of Bones.

Jon grabbed the sword Ygritte had thrown towards him and quickly pulled himself to his feet. Raya was proud of how quickly he regained his footing. He blocked the hit headed towards him. The sound of metal hitting metal was one Raya was accustomed to. She looked around attempting to see what she would need to do to break free if she needed to save her brother.

They fought. They fought and the wildlings circled around them, keeping Raya a nice distance away. They fought and Raya's stomach did spins and flips. When Jon was pushed backwards and against the wildling wall enclosing them Raya thought she may throw up. Ghost was restless. He grumbled from where he was laid in the snow. The wildlings threw Jon back in to the center of the circle and the battle resumed. Raya fought against the men holding her. Jon charged at Qhorin and he dodged.

"Did your traitor father teach you that?" he taunted.

Raya's blood boiled and she yelled in anger again.

"KILL HIM!" she yelled, "KILL HIM NOW!"

Jon blocked his sister out. He focused. Raya's eyes were involuntarily rimming with tears. She knew that Qhorin was pretending. She was a hardheaded and rash individual but she wasn't as bad as she was letting on. No. This was for the benefit of Ygritte. She knew he didn't mean what he said about their father. However, she was prepared to kill him for Jon. That wasn't an act. That was family loyalty. She was beyond the wall for him.

Their swords hit louder. Jon was concentrating. He was getting angrier. Raya could see it. She relaxed a little. An angry Jon was a Jon that could take care of himself.

"Or maybe it was your whore mother!" Qhorin growled, sending Jon back against the wall of men.

They threw him back in for the second time. Jon was ready now. He was mentally ready. Raya bit her bottom lip. Every swing that Jon delivered was accompanied by a grunt. He was giving everything he had. Raya took a deep breath to calm her heart rate.

Qhorin's sword was knocked out of his hands and to the ground.

Raya resisted the urge to yell anything. She couldn't encourage him. He needed to make a decision on his own before the wildling people. She averted her eyes, blinked them a few times and then took in the scene before her. She had seen her father behead people. She assumed it would be like that.

It wasn't.

Jon stabbed the sword through Qhorin's chest. There was a pause before he pulled it out.

"We are the watchers of the wall," he whispered to Jon.

Qhorin's body fell to the ground and shook slightly before stilling. Jon looked up and at his sister. He need reassurance. He found it. She nodded once, an almost unnoticed gesture. He was doing this for her life. He had done this for the men he called his brothers. He could and would not fail.

"You can tell Mance that this is the man that killed Qhorin," Ygritte said finally.

The Lord of Bones closed in on Jon. His breath got caught in his throat. The Lord of Bones snatched Ygritte's sword away from him and with the blood of Qhorin still on it, cut his hands free.

"Burn the body!" he said to no one in particular, "You wouldn't want this one coming back for you," he hissed to Jon.

He bumped his shoulder as he brushed past him and Raya was released from the men that had been holding her. She resisted the urge to run to her brother and yank him in to her. Instead she watched Ygritte close in on him. She was satisfied with that. Ygritte said something to Jon and he cast a quick look to his sister before following her.

Raya watched as they began to gather supplies to burn Qhorin's body. She understood his death. She understood it well. He had sacrificed himself for her and Jon. She knew that. She could not be upset. She could not weep. Tears would betray them. Raya cast a look at her dire wolf. The Lord of Bones was cutting them free. Jon had gained a little trust, enough for them to know that she wouldn't run. She was proud of that.

"Raya!"

Ygritte looked off at where Ygritte and Jon stood looking at her. She walked to them quickly and paused. There were tents beyond the mountain, thousands of them. There were far more wildlings than there were men on the wall. She knew that without going down to them. She feared for what her brother had planned. His brotheren would be slaughtered and she knew Jon wasn't the type to run.

"Come along," Ygritte smiled at them, "It's time to meet the king beyond the wall."


	5. Chapter 5

_Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated. -Confucius_

The trek down the rest of the mountain was a long and treacherous one, but Raya refused to complain. She wanted to be a spearwife partially for freedom and partially to protect her brother. She couldn't fully beat down the way that she wanted to become what Ygritte spoke of. She wanted to be free. She wanted to be able to do what she pleased and marry who she pleased and love who she pleased and say what she pleased. She wanted to be able to warg and use greensight and run wild. She wanted to wear trousers all the time and leave her hair as it grew out of her head. She had to admit that the thoughts were nice ones.

Raya didn't speak on her thoughts. She had no one to speak to. She remained behind Jon and Ygritte. She knew that her brother was battling himself inside and there was nothing that she could tell him with all the wildlings falling in around them.

When they reached the bottom of the mountain Raya took in the tents first. They were made of different things. She couldn't believe it. The different wildlings really had come together. She was slightly amazed and slightly afraid. They had all gotten together. For what? To kill the men at the Night's Watch? To murder her brother?

She didn't open her mouth.

She followed the wildlings deeper in to the camp. She saw men and women alike, sharpening weapons, hanging up their meat over fires and building more shelters. She saw them trading among each other and sitting together on logs, laughing. She saw guards- plenty of them. She saw…

Raya paused, sending the Lord of Bones directly in to the back of her. Ygritte and Jon both paused and looked back at the sound he'd grunted. Raya had yet to move an inch or to look at the very pissed off man behind her. Her eyes were too focused on the giant before her. She was not overexaggerating. This was not a man of 7 feet. No, this was a man easily 12 feet, bigger in size than any she'd ever dreamed about. She'd heard about them. She had never suspected that they were real. He was large, evenly proportioned, with long gray hair and quite a lot of stray bits of animal pelts covering his entire body. His beard was maybe as long as half of Raya's body He was carrying easily a day's worth of wood under one of his arms. To say Raya was shocked was an understatement. She looked to her brother who simply looked at her back. She was relieved to see that he was as amazed as she was.

Ygritte looked from Raya to Jon.

"First time seeing a giant Raya Stark?"

Words failed her. Raya nodded silently. The Lord of Bones, shoved her a little to the side to walk around her and the others followed. Raya cast a look at Jon again. She was amused. Jon, however looked worried. She knew that he was thinking. He was thinking of all the men that giant could crush beneath his feet.

"Well don't stare too long you too," Ygritte smirked, "They're shy."

Raya opened her mouth to apologize and words failed her once more as he lifted a wood the size of a tree easily, lined it up and hit it with his fist. The wood pierced the ground as if being hammered in to it. Raya licked her lips.

"Once they stop being shy, they become angry," Ygritte continued, "I've seen them pound men straight in to the ground as if they were tent posts."

Jon and Raya both looked to Ygritte. She was smiling at them. She didn't utter another word. Instead she turned away from them and began walking again. They followed.

"Stay close to me, Jon Snow," Ygritte called over her shoulder, "Raya you can blend in quite nicely. Every tribe will think you belong to another."

Raya nodded at that. She had forgotten that she had changed in to the clothing of the wildlings. Ygritte had redressed her. She was warmer. She was warmer and she blended in better. That was why she wasn't being given the looks that Jon was.

"Crow," some spat in his direction.

"Crow!"  
"Crow,"

They were mumbling and talking among each other now. Ygritte just continued to walk. Jon and Raya just continued to follow. Jon was taking everyone in. He refused to submit and avert his eyes. He liked to be aware of everything. That wasn't going to change.

A rock flew from one direction and hit Jon. He sniffed but continued to push forward.

"Crow!" another rock flew and hit him from the other direction.

Raya was getting slightly irritated. She bent down and picked up a little stray stick. She sped up her walking to be closer to her brother's back.

"Crow!" a woman yelled.

Another rock flew. This time Raya was prepared. She hit it away with her stick before it could strike him.

"He's wearing the wrong color," Ygritte chuckled.

"Mance was a ranger."

Another rock flew and Raya hit it away again.

"In your hearts all you crows want to fly free," Ygritte shrugged.

"When I'm free will I be free to go?" Jon griped.

"Crow!"

"Crow!"

"Crow!"

A series of rocks flew at Jon. Raya wasn't fast enough. They pelted him and he temporarily hunched over. Raya gritted her teeth and Ygritte fell back and nudged her as if she could sense the fury about to be released.

"Sure you will," Ygritte answered.

She grabbed a spear from one of the nearby weapon holders and walked back over quickly knocking two wildlings down.

"And I'll be free to kill ya'." She smirked back at him and then began walking again.

Jon cast a look at his sister who simply shrugged and rolled her eyes before falling in line behind Ygritte. He sighed and did as she had done.

"They have no respect," Ygritte told them, "They have no fathers to beat them when they're foul."

"What happened to their fathers?" Jon questioned.

Raya shook her head. She already knew the answer.

"Some of them were killed by crows like you," she pushed the hood of her fur coat off of her head and took in Jon's face, "Don't look so grim, Jon Snow. If Mance Rayder likes you you'll live another day. And if he don't…" she let her voice trail off.

"What would that mean for Raya?" he stopped walking and grabbed Ygritte by the shoulder, pulling her back around to face him.

He was aware of all the wildling eyes on him. He didn't care. Raya closed in on her brother and sat a hand on one of his shoulders.

"I'll fight for her, Jon Snow," Ygritte jerked her arm free and spun around to continue walking, "It isn't her fault where she was born or how she was raised. She hasn't killed any of our men as far as I know. If she wants to be a spearwife we wouldn't leave the girl to fend for herself,"

Jon nodded at that and cast a look at his sister who was walking behind him as he caught up to Ygritte and fell in stride beside her.

They walked silently until Ygritte paused outside of a tent. Raya took notice of the men gathered around outside of it. Ygritte cast a look at them; the Snow and the Stark and then she walked over, pulled back the flap of the tent, handed the spear she'd picked up to man on one side and got a sword from the man on the other. Jon was ushered in quickly and Raya followed closely behind.

This was easily one of the bigger tents Raya had seen. There were several men circled around a fire. They were eating and talking quickly and quietly. Jon was dragged and inserted in to the circle. Raya wasn't sure where The Lord of Bones had come from but he stood behind Jon. Ygritte held Ygritte by the upper arm and pulled her a little away. The stood against the outer edge of the tent.

Raya's heart had sped up. Her brother would soon be judged.

"I smell a crow," one of the men said without looking up.

Raya took him in. He was a broad man, with a broad face and a red beard and hair that stopped at his shoulders. His hair was red like Ygritte's… like Sansa's. He was wearing something extremely similar to what Ygritte had one. Raya assumed they were from the same area.

"We killed his friends," The Lord of Bones removed his headgear for the first time since Raya had laid eyes on him, "We thought you may have wanted to question this one."

"What do we want with a baby crow?" he took a bite of whatever it was he was eating off of a stick.

"I won't always be around," Ygritte whispered to Raya, "Keep your temper."

Raya nodded and licked her lips. Ygritte was right. She could make everything worse for her brother. That wasn't what she wanted. Not at all.

"This baby crow killed Qhorin Halfhand," Ygritte explained, "He and his sister want to be some of us."

The man shoved the rest of his meal in to his mouth and dropped the stick to the ground. He stood up slowly, silently. Raya resisted the urge to close in on her brother as the wildling stood up to his full height. He would tower over her by a few inches. The wildling closed in on Jon.

"That half handed cunt killed friends of mine," he said gruffly, "friends that were twice your size," he looked Jon up and down.

"Well my father told me that big men fall just as quick as little ones," Jon met his gaze, "if you put a sword through their heart."

"Plenty of little men tried to put their swords through my heart," he smiled menacingly, "and there are plenty of little skeletons buried in the woods," he cast a look towards Raya and Ygritte and then looked down at Jon, "What's your name boy?"

"Jon Snow."

There was a pause. There was silence. Jon dropped to a knee.

"Your grace," he said quietly.

Raya rolled her eyes. She could snatch her brother by his hair. She would. She would do it. Raya didn't meet Ygritte's gaze.

Ygritte and the Lord of Bone's laughed.

"You grace?" the redhead laughed, "Did you hear that?" he addressed the room, "From now on you better kneel every time I fart."

Raya made her way beside her brother and yanked him to his feet by his cloak. They were laughing at him. They were laughing at her brother.

"They don't kneel beyond the wall, Jon!" Raya snapped.

"She's right boy!" someone snapped.

Raya and Jon both spun around and was faced with another man. He was of middling height, long legged and lean, broad in the chest and shoulders, and sharp-faced with brown eyes and long brown hair gone mostly to gray. He had laughter lines appear at the corners of his mouth. His face was sharp and housed shrewd brown eyes. He was a good looking man to Raya. He was wearing black ringmail and shaggy fur breeches, over which he'd draped a slashed cloak of black wool and red silk.

"We don't kneel for anyone beyond the wall," he said simply, "So," he looked over Jon and then Raya, "You're Ned Stark's bastard and his first born girl?" he didn't want for an answer, "Thank you for the gift Lord of Bones. You may leave us."

Raya watched him leave and almost panicked when she say Ygritte follow him out. She held her ground instead. She stood up a little straighter and pushed all of her hair behind her shoulders.

"The girl likes you," he told Jon, "Do you like her back, Snow?"

Raya noticed the way Jon looked around the room.

"Is that why you want to join us?" he asked again.

Jon swallowed and looked to Raya.

"Don't panic boy," the redhead wildling man smirked, "This isn't the Night's Watch where we make you swear off girls," he chuckled.

"This chicken eater than you thought was king is actually Tormund Giantsbane," the elder man explained.

Raya wasn't an idiot. She took the man in again. Mance. He was Mance.

"I can't believe this little boy killed Halfhand," Tormund said gruffly.

"He was our enemy," Mance said, "and I'm glad he's dead.

He held out a hand to Jon. Raya took a quick breath. Jon took the hand stretched to him. They shook. Jon seemed to want to pull back. Mance yanked him in.

"He was my brother once," he said, "back when he had a whole hand," he released Jon's hand, "What were you doing with him?"

"The Lord Commander sent me to the Halfhand for seasoning."

"Why?"

"He wants me to lead one day."

"But here you are," Mance shook his head, "A traitor- kneeling to the king beyond the wall."

Raya visibly tensed. Jon took a slight step closer and in front of his younger sister.

"If I'm traitor," he said evenly, "then so are you."

"Why do you want to join us Jon Snow?"

"… I want to be free."

"No," Mance smiled, "I don't think so. I think what you want most of all is to be a hero."

A man Raya hadn't noticed before stood up in a corner of the tent, an ax in hand.

"I'll ask you one more time," Mance said shortly.

Raya got prepared to claw the nearest man's eyes out. She could see Tormund closing in behind them.

"Why do you want to join us?" he repeated.

"We stopped at Craster's Keep on the way north," he cast a look at Raya, "I saw it."

"You saw what?" Mance questioned.

"I saw Craster take his own baby boy and leave it in the woods… I saw what took it."

"You're telling me you saw one of them?" Mance nodded twice, "Now, why would that make you abandon your brothers?"

"Because," Jon took a deep breath, "when I told the Lord Commander he already knew," he ignored the way Mance's eyes slightly widened, "Thousands of years ago the first men battled the white walkers and defeated them," Jon looked to his sister, "I want to fight for the side that fights for the living," Jon looked back to Mance, "Did I come to the right place?"

Mance stared at him for a while and then turned his gaze to Raya.

"And why are you here?"

She swallowed and licked her lips.

"I came on this side of the wall to find my brother," she said simply, "but I'm staying on this side of the wall because I am not a pawn for men to use to gain lands and gold trinkets. I want to be free to marry who I want, to wear what I want, to say what I want and to warg whenever I want."

Jon's head snapped to the side.

"Raya!" he nearly shouted her name.

"You can warg girl?" Mance looked her up and down.

"Yes," she said simply.

She wasn't afraid. If anything she thought that she was helping their chances. They could be an asset.

"Maybe the Starks really are of the first men," he chuckled, "We'll need to find you a different cloak, boy."

Mance turned on his heels and quickly started towards the exit of the tent, the wildling with the ax following in tow.

"Come along, boy!" he called.

Jon looked to his sister who nodded twice.

"Go along, **boy,** " she jokingly enunciated the last word, "I'm a big girl. I can take care of myself."

"Stay out of trouble Raya," he said simply, "I mean it."

"I no longer answer to the men in my family, Jon," Raya smiled fakely, "I'm a free woman."

Jon smiled and shook his head before hurrying after Mance Rayder.

Raya looked around the tent. She was alone… almost. Tormund Giantsbane was standing near her. He was standing there and just taking her in as she was doing to him.

Raya was used to the looks men tossed her way as soon as she had left girlhood. She got looks from younger men like Jojen Reed. She got looks from older men like Petyr Baelish the two times he had visited her family. She was used to them.

She wasn't as darling as Sansa, sure, but she was pretty in her own way. She was used to attention especially when she was rude and inappropriate and fighting with her brothers or Arya.

What Raya wasn't used to was the nervousness she felt creeping through her body. Tormund closed in on her in a simple 7 steps. If he took another their chests would be touching. Raya looked up at him. He was bigger than she'd thought. Wind flew through the open flap of the tent and her hair flew around her. Her heart had sped up. She tried to not get nervous. She failed. She failed and she knew that he could tell by the way a smile crept the length of his. His gray-blue eyes danced as if they were laughing while his mouth couldn't. Raya was frozen. She was frozen and there was nothing she could do about. She wasn't sure if she was intimated because he was a wildling or because he was so much bigger than her. It had to be the first. She didn't typically fear anyone. She didn't lose her ability to think. She had never… She would never… She had done it now. She had lost her ability of movement for the first time.

"Don't look at me that way, girl," his voice boomed, "You may make me want to chase you."

Tormund Giantsbane let his head fall back and he laughed a deep rumbling sound that seemed to come from his chest. He laughed and his body shook and Raya simply stood there, her eyes trained on him. He laughed until he seemed to be unable to breath. Then, he wiped his eyes with the back of one of his hands, turned on his heels and without looking back again, let himself out of the tent.

Raya could hear him laughing again outside of the tent. She looked around and then yanked the hood of her clothing over her head. She took a deep breath. She didn't feel like she could breathe until his laughing faded. She allowed herself to sit on the wooden area Tormund had been seated on, eating when she and Jon had entered. She wasn't prepared to walk through the wildling camp on her own.

She sat on the log, stretched her legs before her and tried to breathe. That was all she aspired to do. She just wanted to breathe again.

 **A/N: The next few chapters will be made up from my head and deviate from the show because I'm about to begin developing Raya and Tormund's relationship. So these next few chapters will be them traveling to the wall and preparing for battle.**


	6. Chapter 6

" _I have learned that if you must leave a place that you have lived in and loved and where all your yesteryears are buried deep, leave it any way except a slow way, leave it the fastest way you can. Never turn back and never believe that an hour you remember is a better hour because it is dead. Passed years seem safe ones, vanquished ones, while the future lives in a cloud, formidable from a distance."_

― _Beryl Markham, West with the Night_

Raya was comfortable among the wildlings. It was both a scary and interesting discovery. She didn't feel the way that she had when she had been seated at a table with the Lannisters. She had felt awkward and judged and she wasn't sure if it was from the absurd amount of hair pins in her hair or the tightness of the dress she had been forced in to, but sitting with them had made her ill. She had been forced to bite her tongue and handle it, for the sake of her father and his relationship with the late King Robert Baratheon. She didn't feel that awkward aching in the pit of her stomach here however… and that said plenty.

She had been promised to Jaime Lannister once upon a time. Tywin would have a hand in the Baratheon family and the Starks. Eddard had asked Raya how she'd felt about the match and she had welcomed it. She would be fine with Jaime. The walls held whispers of the affections he held for his twin sister. That made the match all the better in Raya's opinion. He would warm Cersei's bed instead of harass her. Cersei would be jealous of certain things and so surely Jaime wouldn't do them. In Raya's opinion, she could have done worse. Sir Jaime had agreed to wait until Raya was ready to come to court. He had told her he would wait for her to grow up. He and Tyrion were the only two halfway decent members of that Gods awful family. Raya had agreed, but Sansa had been paired with Joffrey and Tywin had decided he didn't need Raya. Jaime had been a little off put of simply shutting their engagement down. He hadn't wanted to offended her father. Raya had told her father it wasn't an insult and the Lannisters had made a sizeable contribution to the families in the north. Everyone had won… except for Sansa. She had gotten the husband she'd want, but he was far from how she'd imagined him, Raya was sure.

Sansa. Poor little Sansa who had gotten everything she had ever wanted… at the cost of her sanity and everything else she held dear. She had a brother give his life to the Night's Watch, a sister giving up her name to be a wildling, a brother crippled by her husband's family, a headless father, a mother and brother at war, a sister missing… and Rickon. Her family had been torn apart. For what?

Raya shook her head clear of the thoughts. Everyone had made their choices. Sansa had chosen to be with Joffrey. Jon had chosen his oath. Robb had chosen war and their mother had chosen to go with him. She should have been able to make choices for herself. Everyone else got to do so.

She tucked stray strands of her hair behind her ears before grabbing the hood of her clothing and yanking it over her head. She was torturing herself with her thoughts. There was nothing for her to say or do that would help her family. Even if she hadn't been on this side of the wall no one would listen to her. She was a girl.

Raya looked around the large fire. She was seated on a log beside Ygritte. There was a log on each side of the fire for a total of four. Raya had no idea who the other people were. She was sure one of the men was the Lord of Bones as Ygritte had called him, but she had no clue about the others. Jon had long ago taken to his tent, the one he would be sharing with Mance. Raya had stayed with the 12 wildlings. There were three women seated together on the log to Raya's right. To the left there were four men. Directly across from her there was thee men and a woman. No one had wanted to be seated by Raya. Or at least that was what she thought.

They treated her better than they treated Jon already however. He hadn't been pelted by much of anything after he'd taken off the cloak that had labeled him a crow for all to see.

Raya had gotten a fur blanket thrown over her by Mance a little earlier in to the night and had never discarded it. She sat with her hood on, her black hair braided in to one lose braid to keep it from flying with the wind and whipping her in the face. River sat beside her feet his eyes trained on something she couldn't see within the flames.

The wildlings were talking about something that Raya just could not get her heart and mind in to. Her head was a million miles away. She was sure Ygritte had taken notice but hadn't said anything.

Ygritte had become her makeshift guardian. It was Ygritte who she was to share a tent with. It was Ygritte who had saved her and Jon from death. She wasn't outwardly nice, but Raya knew for a fact that Ygritte liked her. She liked her back and it wasn't simply because Jon was fond of her. She liked Ygritte for her attitude, her independence and her flaming self-respect. She was everything Raya wanted to be. She was the sort of woman that would make Arya proud

Raya's thoughts seemed to pause.

She was sure she felt his presence before she actually saw him making his way towards the fire; Tormund Giantsbane. He made his way directly over to Raya and plopped himself down, wedging her between him and Ygritte who had never paused in her conversation with some of the other surrounding people. Everyone had continued to talk but Raya had blanked them out even further. River had moved closer to her, but she was more aware of the way Tormund's arm brushed against hers. She was partly thankful for the extra body heat and partly anxious about the closeness. She assumed he was just one of those people that didn't respect boundaries. No one else had looked up or said anything. Raya assumed this was his normal behavior.

He inserted himself in to one of the three different conversations taking place and talked in his loud booming voice. He had a dominating part in the conversation. He was loud and he laughed quite a lot. He reminded Raya of the Umbers; his size, his voice, that laugh that cut through the air and made others want to laugh in return.

Raya looked around to find four sets of eyes on her.

"What?" she said looking to Ygritte.

Ygritte laughed.

"Can you really warg?" one of the women asked.

"Yes," it was a simple answer to a simple question.

"And here I was - " Tormund's voice shut down.

Raya watched slightly shocked and slightly amazed as one of the men stood up, half ran around the fire and grabbed one of the women from where she was sitting. He threw her over his shoulder and took off through the tents that littered the snow. Raya could do nothing but watch after them.

The men around the fire began to laugh almost simultaneously. Ygritte shook her head.

"Did he just…" Raya looked around the fire.

No one seemed concerned.

"He just kidnapped the woman he wants to be his wife," Ygritte said softly.

"So if she returns alone it's safe to assume he's dead?" Raya asked, her eyes still trained on the space between the tents.

"Yes," Tormund nodded his head once, an overexaggerated gesture.

Raya nodded at that. It was… different. She didn't want to think that it was strange. It was their way of life. It was a way of life she was hoping to possibly embrace. If they kidnapped their – her thoughts subsided faster than they had gone. Tormund had said she had almost made him want to chase her. Did he mean chase her or did he mean kidnap her? Was there a difference. Raya looked at Ygritte who was talking to Tormund who had apparently seen the entire thing coming.

"Ygritte," Raya said her name quietly, not wanting to draw attention to herself.

Ygritte and Tormund both looked at her and she swallowed and licked her lips.

"Is there a difference between chasing someone and kidnapping them? When concerning marriage I mean?"

"I don't believe so," Ygritte looked to Tormund.

"No," he confirmed.

"… Does that mean you and Jon are married? Since he caught you?"

There was a pause. Then, there was a blush from Ygritte and a laugh so loud from Tormund the 7 other people present turned to look at the three of them.

"What was that?" The Lord of Bones asked.

"Nothing," Tormund waved him off, "Nothing at all."

Raya looked from Tormund to Ygritte. No one had answered and to her that was answer enough. Jon would lose his mind. Surely, he hadn't truly decided to be govern by the rules that were law beyond the wall, but it would mess with his head all the same. She knew her brother. She knew he was conflicted enough. He had been more or less welcomed among these people, these people that he would possibly betray. Raya knew that it was Jon's plan to befriend them only long enough to get back to the wall, but she hoped that he would have a change of heart. She hoped that his feelings for Ygritte would just continue to grow. She hoped that he would break. She thought that it could be a possibility. He was a man of honor, but he was also a man of family and Raya simply had to believe that if it came down to the wildlings or the Night's Watch he would choose the side that his sister was on. She wasn't sure however. There was doubt, just a little of it.

Ygritte stood up.

"I'm going to our tent," she told Raya, "Don't stray from camp."

"Of course, mother," Raya made a face.

Ygritte laughed before speaking her goodbyes in to the air. Raya scooted away from Tormund, to give him and herself more space. She wasn't ready to sleep. She wasn't sure why that was. She was simply wide awake.

She sat quietly as the people around her talked, joked and laughed. She had crashed back in to herself. She could listen and observe again. Her head was back on her shoulders.

The people around her were men and women like those on the other side of the wall. The difference was in their customs. They talked about each other. They were friends. She was sure they were from the same area however. They were all dressed more or less alike.

She was well aware that different clothing matched different areas. They wore what was easy for them to get. They were all wildlings. They agreed with some and disliked some, much like things were on the other side of the wall. Mance was their king. Each different tribe was like that of a noble house. Some of the houses were lifelong friends while some of the others had hated each other for generations. It was the same political nonsense on both sides of the wall. The difference lied in the fact that the free folk could temporarily put aside their difference. The great houses could not. The Darnishmen had yet to forgive the Lannisters. Raya was sure the Greyjoys still disliked the Starks. Raya's own father had been no fan of the Lannisters himself, Cersei or the Kingslayer as everyone enjoyed calling Jaime. They were all under one king, but that didn't stop them from fighting among each other. That was how Raya felt the wildlings were. They were cordial because there was a greater good, but friends they were not.

Raya reached a hand down and scratched River between his ears. She let her eyes drift across the people that were around the fire. New firewood was added to it. Raya hugged the blanket around her shoulders slightly tighter.

One by one she watched people retreat to their tents in twos.

She remained where she was. She was a curious thing and she knew her curiosity would only be quenched when she saw the outcome of the kidnapping. She wanted to know if the woman would come back married. She wanted to know if should would come back covered in blood and be forced to tell her tribe that she had stabbed the man to death for her freedom… for her freedom. The phrase replayed itself in Raya's head. She had always wanted to fight for her freedom. If someone attempted to kidnap her she would have to… literally. She would have to literally, physically fight someone for her freedom.

Raya was slightly aware of the fact that she was one of three. There she sat beside Tormund, a woman seated across from them. She wasn't sure what in specific the woman and Tormund were speaking about. Shew was sure that they preferred it that way. She reached her hand in to her hood and pulled her hair free of the braid that had rested there. She pulled her hair over one shoulder and with her eyes trained on the raging fire, combed her fingers through her hair. It was knotted, thick and dirty. She would wash it the first chance she got no matter how cold it was.

Raya's head jerked up when the woman across from her stood to her feet. She bid Raya and Tormund a goodnight and they echoed the words back to her. Raya sat up and released her hair from her hands, shoving it back in to her hood. She waited for Tormund to stand and take his leave.

He didn't.

X

Tormund Giantsbane was slightly amused by the Stark girl. He didn't exactly trust her. He didn't trust her and he surely didn't trust that crow brother of hers. Ygritte had defended the girl though. She had sworn the Stark girl was a spearwife through and through. He thought he had caught a partial glimpse, the way she had jerked her brother to his feet and set him straight for bowing. He could also tell that she was loyal to her brother through and through. So, while Tormund thought that there was a chance she may actually be interested in being a spearwife he also knew deep in his bones that the crow was a liar and she would have to make a choice eventually… and that was what worried him.

She was a darling thing that Stark girl. She looked young. She had a kind of long neck and doe like eyes. She was an attractive one. He would give her that.

The thought shocked him. She was a little small for his taste. He liked bigger ladies, built like bears. He had an entire story he shared on the regular about sleeping with a bear. This girl, however, was as far from that as possible. She wasn't thick and burly. She was a short, skinny, nimble thing.

"So," he broke the silence, "Can you talk girl?" it was an honest question.

Besides when she'd jerked her crow brother from kneeling he couldn't remember a time she had spoken more than a few words.

"Yes," Raya said finally, "I can talk."

"So, you just have nothing to say?"

"No one ever listens."

Tormund laughed. Raya shrugged. He knew that she had been serious, extremely serious.

"So little girl Stark what was your name again?"

"Raya."

"Raya," he repeated it back to her.

"And yours?" he watched her push her hood off of her head.

"Tormund Giantsbane."

"Giantsbane," Raya repeated, "Why do they call you that?"

"Well," Tormund looked over the girl before deciding she looked harmless enough, "I killed a giant once."

"You're lying."

She hadn't paused. She hadn't had to blink. She had heard his declaration and shut him down. Tormund laughed. This girl was amusing, as dumb as she may be.

"Now why would you doubt a mighty man like me?" he feigned innocence, "It was winter and I was half a boy, and stupid the way boys are I went too far and my horse died and then a storm caught me. A true storm, not no little dusting! I knew I'd freeze to death before it broke. So I found me a sleeping giant, cut open her belly, and crawled up right inside her. She kept me warm enough, she did, but the stink nearly killed me," he laughed, "The worst thing was, she woke up when the spring come and took me for her babe. Suckled me for three whole moons before I could get away," Tormund smacked his knee and he laughed, "There's times I miss the taste o' giant's milk, though."

"If you killed her how could she nurse you?" Raya asked genuinely confused.

"I never did," he admitted, "but don't go spreading that about. Tormund Giantsbane has a better ring to it than Tormund Giantsbabe, and that's the honest truth of it."

"Aye, Tormund Giantsbane," Raya smiled, "Your secret is safe with me."

"Good," he leaned back a little, "Now you can tell me a story."

"I don't know any good stories."

"You have a life don't you?" Tormund retorted.

"I do."

"Then tell me about that."

"Okay," Raya sat up, "Once when I was half the name days I am now I climbed the side of one of the Winterfell towers. My mother and father absolutely hated when my brothers and I would do it, but that never stopped me," Raya looked to her right and caught sight of River making his way towards her, "Well I scaled up the wall and my first given sister, Sansa, told my mother. She was furious. She went on and on about how unladylike it was and I was a tad bit angry so I burned a hole in the head of Sansa's doll and then I stuck the dolls arm through the hole. She cried and my eldest brother took the lashing for me.

"I think I like you, girl," he laughed, "for the most part anyhow."

"Can you do that?" Raya asked, "just decide that you like an outsider?"

River laid out on his stomach across Raya's feet. Tormund's laughing died down.

"I'm a free man. I can do whatever I damn well please."

"Oh…" Raya genuinely seemed taken aback.

"And if you want to be a free woman then you should do as you very well please too, girl."

"I have a name, Tormund Giantsbane," Raya reminded.

Tormund smirked at that, but said nothing. Raya searched her head for something to say. He was the first wilding to initiate conversation with her just because.

"Have wi- free folk," Raya automatically corrected herself, "always married by capture?"

"Aye," he smiled, "Spearwives want a husband who is strong, quick, and cunning. If a man can manage to capture her and overpower her attempts to kill him, he's proven that he is worthy and earns her respect."

"What if I'm captured by someone I despise?"

"You can always slit their throats in their sleep," he shrugged.

Raya laughed at that and Tormund smiled.

"Are you married, Tormund?" she questioned.

"No," he shook his head, "My wife was taken from me quite a few winters ago."

"Any children?"

"A little curious, aren't you Stark?"

"Just a little."

"Munda," the name caused a new smile to cross his face, "She was taken by that Longspear Ryk. I couldn't cut his cock off fast enough and he made away with her despite my best attempts. She took him as husband, if you believe it," he rolled his eyes, "That boy's got more cock than sense, you ask me… but he treats her well enough. I told him if he ever hurt her, I'd yank his member off and beat him bloody with it."

Raya smiled at that. She could hear her father threatening her betrothed to treat her well. Hell, she could hear Robb and Jon doing the act.

"Tormund," Raya said slowly.

"What?"

"How old are you?"

"Many moons, little Stark."

Raya nodded at that and stifled a yawn.

"Why are you still out here alone anyway?" he changed the subject.

"I wanted to know what would come of the couple."

"And you thought that you could outwait them?" he sounded shocked- amused even.

"Yes."

Tormund scoffed. Raya yawned again.

He cast a look in her direction before standing. He bent down and began to throw snow on to the fire.

"Get some rest, girl," he grumbled.

He had started to feel her out, but he wasn't exactly sure how much he trusted her. He knew he couldn't have been the only one with such a strange feeling towards the girl. His thoughts would give him no rest. He would test her. He would test her the way he was sure Mance would entrust him with testing Jon. He hoped she would pass. The last thing he wanted was for an arrow to find itself wedged in the back of the little Stark girls head.

 **A/N: I got so much great feedback to the chapters I have up already and I honestly didn't think that this would end up being a fic. I thought it would just be a few drabble chapters and on to something else, but anywho… this is my thank you to everyone! Thank you for clicking on this fic. Thank you for making it this far. Thank you for follows, favorites and/or reviews. Thank you for reading and waiting for the next chapter. Thank you if you made it this far in and decided this fic just isn't for you. I appreciate it all!**


	7. Chapter 7

_Well she was precious like a flower. She grew wild, wild but innocent- a perfect prayer in a desperate hour. She was everything beautiful and different. Stupid boy, you can't fence that in. Stupid boy, it's like holdin' back the wind. –Keith Urban_

Raya trudged along in a comfortable middle position. She wasn't near the front of the heard, but she wasn't in the back either. She was keeping good pace in her opinion. She knew that Jon and Ygritte had no doubt taken up the front. Mance kept a close eye on Jon and Jon had no issue staying close to him. He thought that it would help him with his… whatever it was that he was doing. It had been all of two days since Raya had sat around that fire with the Free Folk. She had four ahead of her before they reached their destination according to the people around her. It was a week look trek to wherever it was going. No one had volunteered the information and so Raya hadn't asked. The last thing she needed was for people to think that she was spying on them.

The wind blew again, causing a shiver to travel up her spine. River looked up at her but continued to trot along. Raya took a deep breath. It was still cold, but it was slightly less cold than it had been when she had started her journey. She didn't know if that meant that she was getting better adapted to the cold or if that met that they were getting closer north.

She didn't know what awaited her in four days, but she had begun to pray that she be prepared for it. She and Jon had stolen away only a few moments together and they had not been the best of moments. They head each reminded each other of the loyalty they had for one another, but that was where the similarities stopped.

Raya had made it clear that she wanted to be one of the Free Folk. She wanted to make her own decisions. She was prepared for that and what it meant.

Jon had made it clear that he would be fighting against their people if they attacked the wall. He couldn't let the entire north fall for his sister.

Raya had made a comment about him not taking her safety in to account before taking the Black.

That was the way their last conversation had ended a day ago in full. Jon had opened his mouth and then closed it and stormed out of her tent. Raya had stomped out after him and found herself a place to sit alone and warg with River if only for a little.

The siblings had yet to speak since their heated discussion.

Certain people had noticed.

"Why aren't you with your kin and Ygritte?"

Raya didn't need to turn around to know who it was talking to her, a voice that seemed to fall on her from the very obvious height difference.

"I don't have to do everything that Jon does, Tormund Giantsbane."

Tormund chuckled at that.

"I 'pose not," he scratched his beard.

"Why are you this far back in the travelers?"

"To keep you company of course," was his quick reply.

"Well you have been doing quite a poor job."

Tormund made his way beside Raya and yanked her hood off of her head before spinning in front of her. He bowed from the waist down, now walking backwards to keep up with her.

"My apologies, my lady," he stood up and winked.

Raya crossed her arms over her chest.

"Are you making fun of me?"

"Only a little," he admitted.

Raya rolled her eyes and Tormund smiled a wide smile, before turning his back to her and quickly rushing forward and in between two men. He put a hand on each of their shoulders and began talking. They all laughed at the same time.

She wasn't sure how Tormund could change from topics so quickly, or how he seemingly got along with everyone.

Raya pulled her hood back over her head. She blended in to the crowds better that way. She was sure people would recognize her face as unfamiliar if they saw her. She didn't need the wondering looks. It was like the Free Folk had a built in detector for fakes and phonies. She had a bag on her back. It had little in it; the blanket she had gotten from Mance, some water and the clothes that she had been wearing when she'd come north of the wall.

Raya had gotten over Tormund and his comments. She had found that he was not only loud, but crass and inappropriate. He was a flirt and a drunk, but he was also worldly, smart and one hell of a fighter. That was what she had heard anyway.

She could see Tormund being one hell of a fighter, but at the same time she couldn't. He was always laughing and joking. He didn't seem scary and like a skilled warrior. But then again neither did Jon or Robb… or her dead father. Jaime Lannister didn't look like he would stab someone in the back. Joffrey didn't look like a dictator. Cersei didn't look like monster. People hid who they truly were very well. Raya had to remind herself of that.

River paused and Raya followed suit. They'd heard something. It wasn't something that they recognized. It wasn't a person. It wasn't laughing, speaking or shouting even. No, it was strange. It was strange and different. Raya looked around. She looked around but all she could see was the Free Folk continuing to walk around her. Raya wished everyone around her would shut up. She wished their feet would stop making sounds. She wished everyone could just shut up at once. Raya looked at River whose gaze was fixed on something beyond the iced ledge. They were supposed to be walking along a mountain.

Raya looked out in the distance. She looked out and she could have sworn she saw smoke. She walked a little closer. She could hear the small crack of ice beneath her foot. She wasn't very heavy. She would be fine. She leaned forward and closed her eyes. River whimpered. She didn't smell smoke. She looked around her. She was easily pulling up the back now. The Free Folk didn't pause and they didn't waver in their speed. She bit her bottom lip. She paused and took a deep breath and she heard it again. That sound. It sounded like glass shattering. She opened her eyes and looked around her. No one else had seemed to notice. She focused on the smoke again. It wasn't black. It was red. Her eyes were glued to it.

X

Tormund Giantsbane saw her. He didn't like that he saw her. He was weirdly aware of that girl. He paused. She was standing out at the edge of the mountain's pass, her direwolf beside her. He watched her for a little. She was talking to her wolf. He knew that. He looked back towards the front of their herd. He couldn't spot her brother and he had no idea if the girl was okay or not.

He understood what was happening before he even heard the whistle. That was what his people did in times of distress. They whistled. Mance had passed one back. The weather would soon be taking a turn for the worse. The Free Folk would be looking for flat land or a cave big enough to house at least the children. They would be racing to safety.

Tormund wasn't sure how Mance could tell the weather, but he had never been wrong before.

He closed in on Raya quickly. She had yanked her hood off, her hand was outstretched and River was complaining beside her. Tormund reached out to grab her.

"There's a snow storm coming girl. We need to move."

"Tormund," she never looked at him, "Do you see red smoke?"

"Red smoke?"

Tormund looked off towards the distance and sure enough he could see it, faint stretches of red smoke reaching towards the sky. Tormund scratched his beard and then looked to the girl beside him. She looked to be in a trance. Her eyes were glossed over and she seemed a little unstable on her feet.

"That smoke…" Raya paused and then took a step forward.

Tormund saw it happening but wasn't fast enough to stop it so down Raya went off of the edge of a damned mountain. River had snapped at the back of her leg in an attempt to grab her by her pants. He now ran in circles yelping. Tormund looked back at his people. He was gazing at the back of the line now. They had sped past him rather quickly. He cursed to himself. He cursed to himself and looked down at where Raya had fallen. She was sitting up now, rubbing the back of her head and looking up at him.

"Damn it. Go get Jon you stupid mutt," he growled.

He turned his back to the ledge and prepared for the trek down. He wasn't a damned babysitter. He wasn't this girl's father. He wasn't this girl's husband. He wasn't this girl's brother. He was nothing to her. She wasn't even a member of his tribe and yet here he was. He took a deep breath and dropped his back pack to the ground. He quickly pulled out a rope and a stick to stab through the ground. Ygritte owed him. Jon owed him. Mance and the little Stark girl owed him along with Eddard and all the rest of her dead relatives.

X

Pain. That was what Raya felt. It was shooting through her leg and she partially wanted to cry but refused to be a baby. She looked down at her leg and used her hands to stretch them out in front of her. The left one was fine. The right one was bleeding. It was soaking her pants and it burned. Gods, did it burn. Raya took a few quick shallow breaths and looked up again. River was no longer near the edge, but Tormund was moving towards her. He was climbing down the mountain. She let her eyes shut for just a little she could have sworn.

She must have blacked out.

When she opened her eyes Tormund was among her, crouched before her.

Everything fell in to place. She wasn't looking at Tormund Giantsbane as the flirt and the jokester and the person that enjoyed making her uncomfortable, no, not at all. He was her savior.

"Stupid girl," he muttered, "Can you move your leg at all?"

Raya shook her head. Tormund sighed. He looked around them and then up at the sky. He cursed and threw his bag beside her.

"We don't have much time. We need to move before the snow storm sets," he yanked his bag open, "Open your bag."

Raya didn't ask questions. She released the bag from her back and set it in her lap. She pulled the thing open. Tormund pulled out the blanket that Mance had given her and shoved it towards her. He yanked out one of the shirts she'd taken from Jon and set it beside him before taking some of the things out of his bag and putting them in to Rayas; a bow and arrow that stuck out of the thing, some food and some rope and hooks.

"We're leaving the rest," he explained zipping up her newly filled bag, "Put it on your back."

Raya pulled the thing closer to her and wiggled herself in to it as Tormund tore Jon's shirt. He looked up and then quickly back down. He wrapped the tatters of Jon's shirt around her leg.

Snow began to fall. Tormund stood to his full height. He looked around them. He walked a little away and pulled on his rope. The snow began to fall faster. Raya licked her lips. Tormund looked at her. She couldn't climb up that. He knew that. He sighed and walked back over. He offered Raya his hand and she looked at it.

She looked past him and realized there was no red smoke anymore. She was shaken. She was shaken and cold. Her leg was burning. Her head was throbbing. She looked like a stupid little girl who couldn't keep her footing despite the fact that she had been raised in the north scaling stone walls with her brothers. She looked useless and she was angry with herself for that. She was angry that she was so pathetic. She sniffed back her angry tears. She refused to let this man see her cry. She would have to prove herself. She didn't know how or when, but she would prove herself. She had to.

Raya took a deep breath and put both of her hands in Tormund's. He yanked her to her feet and she braced herself against the wall behind her.

Tormund turned his back to her and crouched.

"Get on my back!" he yelled over his shoulder, "and thrown your blanket over you and that bag. You'll need it."

Raya listened without argument. Tormund looked up just once more for the help that he didn't see. They were on their own.

He knew these mountains well enough. He knew it wouldn't take him long to reach a small cave under normal circumstances. These circumstances weren't normal, but he chose a direction and set out.

X

Jon paused at the sound of River's barking. The snow had begun to fall and they were running down the mountain. That was not a figure of speech. They were literally running down the mountain. There was a possibility that the storm would cause an avalanche. Mance wanted everyone down the mountain and a little away. Tents would be set up quickly and people would pour in to them by the tens if needed. He said his people were used to snow and snow storms, but that knowledge and experience wouldn't help them if snow wiped them clear off of the mountain side. They were supposed to clear the mountain on this day anyway and then travel on forward for three days. The process would probably be slightly longer now, but that was fine. That would give Jon more time to think his plans through.

He looked at River and braced himself as people hit his shoulders as they jogged around him. River was barking at him. Jon realized that he was looking at River. He was looking at River, but there was no Raya.

Something was very wrong.

X

Raya was glad that she was seemingly not very heavy. Tormund was walking quickly, a half jog of some sort as he held her by her legs. Her arms were wrapped around his neck, her bag tightly on her back and her blanket thrown over her as he had told her. There was a chance that they were going to freeze out here and it was her fault. It was her fault for being so focused on stupid red smoke. Raya sneezed and sniffed. Tormund didn't look back or waver.

"We should be upon the cave soon!" Tormund yelled over the wind.

It had started to get stronger. Raya was holding on to Tormund with one hand and holding on to her hood and blanket with the other hand. She wrapped the blanket in her fist and then wrapped them back around Tormund so that her face was now covered. Her leg had begun to feel numb. Raya let her head fall forward and on to Tormund's shoulder. She was drained. She was so tired. She peaked out of the small opening between Tormund's clothing and the blanket.

"I never said thank you for coming back for me, Tormund," Raya said in to his ear, watching her breath leave her mouth.

"Of course not. You're a spearwife now. You don't have all of that noble training clouding up your brain!" Tormund called back and he laughed.

Only he could insult her upbringing at a time like this. It was utterly amusing. Raya crashed her head back against his shoulder, held her blanket tighter around her and laughed. The snow fell harder, the wind blew quicker and Raya and Tormund laughed.

 _ **A/N: Thank you all for reading, following, favorite-ing, reviewing or just breezing through. It is all completely and utterly APPRECIATED.**_


	8. Chapter 8

_I can swear, I can joke. I say what's on my mind; if I drink, if I smoke. I keep up with the guys and you see me holding up my middle finger to the world… Fuck your ribbons and your pearls 'cause I'm not just a pretty girl. I'm more than just a picture. I'm a daughter and a sister. -Maggie Lindemann_

Raya was thankful that she'd gotten stuck with Tormund and not her brother. Tormund knew the mountains. Tormund wouldn't attempt to get her to find the wall and never find the rest of the Free Folk. Tormund trekked through the snow like he was born to be in it. He trekked through the snow and then wedged the both of them in to a small cave.

The snow had started to beat down on to them. The wind was making it hard to breath with the way they were moving against it. When Tormund let them in to the cave and set Raya down as deep in to the thing as he could manage she was more than grateful. She was still cold, but she wasn't being snowed on and the wind was blinding her. The wind had gotten to the point where everytime it whistled it would hit her skin in a way that made it burn. She was so cold she was sure that she was hot.

"Blanket," Tormund held out his hand to her and Raya yanked the thing from around her body and handed it to him, "And your bag."

Raya took in their surroundings. The cave was a small one, it couldn't have been more than 10 feet by 10 feet. Raya sat in the farthest left corner and stretched her legs out in front of her. She still couldn't feel her injured leg, but she was sure that it wasn't because it was that damaged. She was sure she had just gashed it. She doubted her leg was broken or seriously injured. She knew that the cold played a part in the feeling in her legs that she didn't have.

She watched Tormund as he dug out some of his hooks from her bag and then stabbed them through her blanket. He hung up the thing as if it was a curtain to their cave. He stabbed 2 hooks along the top in each corner, two in the bottom corner and one more on each side for a series of three going up.

Raya felt a little warmer almost instantly. The wind wasn't hitting her as hard anymore or taking snow to throw in to their small space. The downside of Tormund's act was the dark. It was darker now. She could make out Tormund, but not much else. He closed in on her and sat leg's length away, his back to her as he continued to dig in her bag. He threw the two remaining shirts that she'd taken from Jon over his shoulder. She hadn't worn any of Jon's clothing since Ygritte had given her some of the Free Folks clothing.

"Change," came his gruff order, "Take off the coat and the longer shirt. Dress in Jon's clothing and then redress on top of them. You'll need all the layers if you don't want to freeze," the pants she'd taken from Jon flew at her next, "You can change that too if you'd like since the ones you have on now are ripped."

Raya looked at the black clothing in her lap. The woman that her mother had raised her to be was downright terrified of the thought of stripping down in the same space as a man- a man that she did not know very well, a man that was not her husband. The part of her that was a Stark knew that you did what it was that was needed to survive. Raya pushed the hood of her jacket off of her hood. She grabbed her injured leg and moved it with a grunt as she readjusted her body so that the front of her now faced the corner of the cave.

Raya undressed and redressed quickly. Tormund had been right. Although the clothing that touched her skin was cold, it was still warmer than she had been before. Getting herself in to another set of pants when she could barely feel one of her legs was a challenge that she was not prepared to take on. So, she didn't. She pulled her hair free in hopes that shoving it in to her hood would warm up her ears just a little bit more.

She had gazed back at Tormund during the exchange a few times. He had been unmoving, his eyes focused on their makeshift door. Raya had been thankful for that. Free man or not Tormund Giantsbane had been a gentleman and that had extended beyond simply saving her. Raya attempted to settle herself back in to the corner.

"I'm done," her voice was low and quiet.

It cracked at the end. Tormund turned around to face her, her bag still in his hand. He pulled out Jon's cloak and threw it towards her as well before crawling over to her and plopping down in front of her. He didn't speak to her. He grabbed her leg and lifted it in to his lap. He unwrapped the provisional bandaging they had done and looked at it. He rubbed some of the dry blood off with a barely wet strip of clothing. He pulled a small vile out of a pouch attached to his pants and poured the gross smelling mixture in to one of his hands. It looked gross and sticky and it smelled like sweat and dirt.

Raya felt useless. She couldn't think of anything that she could possibly do to help him. She dug around idly in her bag. She had nothing of great use. Now that there was no blanket and none of Jon's clothing it was vacant. She pulled out a dried piece of meat even though she felt like attempting to swallow would cause her to empty the contents of her stomach. It was something for her to look at so that she didn't have to look at Tormund, or even worse forcefully look at everything else except him. She tore a shred free as Tormund dug around in yet another pouch that was a part of his daily attire. He pulled out a needle and what looked like threading.

He looked at Raya. She stared back.

"Is that thread Tormund?"

"Fishing line," he corrected.

"Is there fish in this cold?"

"Not all of us are from the same place. I traded for it."

Raya nodded at that. There was nothing to say. Tormund sighed and opened his mouth. Raya's eyes visibly widened.

"My hand is full of ointment."

Raya resisted the urge to roll her eyes and call him on his bullshit. She knew for a fact that he had another completely available hand. She had just watched him dig through his clothing with his free hand. Raya said nothing however. She bit her tongue. The man had just saved her from freezing to death and carried her through a raging snow storm.

She fed the food in to Tormund's mouth.

She knew that he enjoyed making her feel uncomfortable. She was fine with that. It was a small price to pay.

Tormund began to apply the strange brown remedy that he carried around to the gash on her leg and Raya continued to feed him until they had emptied half of her food. She placed it back in to her bag and pulled out the water. She drank it first before offering it to Tormund. She didn't know if she'd even be able to drink out of it again after watching him put his mouth on it. In the end she ended up pouring it in to his mouth.

Tormund looked to be thinking. He was concentrating. His mind was far off. Raya could tell. His gaze was on her leg, but his mind was no where near them. He was distant.

She had underestimated what had happened to her. Not only was the gash deeper than she'd thought, but she could very much see her bone and the sight was not a welcomed one. She had resisted the urge to turn away. She had bit back her disgust. The cold had numbed her body. That had to be what it was. There was no reason that she should have not been able to feel something like that. Raya took a deep breath and as quickly as Tormund blanked out he crashed back in to himself and blinked his eyes a few times before looking up and at Raya.

He wiped his hand on his pants and picked up his needle and thread once again. He looked down at Raya's leg and then up at her face again and it registered. He was going to do this.

Tormund knew when the lightbulb lit in Raya's head.

"It hurts less than child birth I'd assume," Tormund shrugged.

Raya didn't answer. He wasn't good at making people feel better. Raya leaned her head back against the cave wall. She took a few shallow breaths and prayed to the Old Gods and the New that Tormund wasn't aware of the tears that silently fell down her face and caused her cheeks to glisten as he stitched the hole in her leg shut.


	9. Chapter 9

_People always say life is full of choices. No one ever mentions fear. -Aaliyah, (Anastasia Soundtrack)_

Raya looked down at her leg. It had long ago stopped bleeding. Tormund's stitching didn't look as bad as she had expected it to. She lifted her arm. After he'd stitched it shut he'd lathered on some more of that weird brown ointment he had been carrying around atop of it. It had stung and then felt soothing. He had told her that she would be fine. She reached trembling fingers towards her skin and bit her bottom lip. Tormund had told her that it would need to be wrapped again in the morning. He was good at the entire taking care of someone thing. Raya's fingers landed on her leg. She could feel the hardness of the fish line beneath her skin. She was thankful that it hadn't been extremely thick. She ran her fingers up the length of the thing and then back down. She had been able to bury her tears back deep down inside of her. She was beginning to regain feeling in her leg. It wasn't much but it was enough for her to be able to move it slightly even if she doubted that she could put her full body weight on it.

She and Tormund had been held up in the cave for all of two days. Tormund had gotten restless relatively quickly. He paced and sharpened his sword and mumbled to himself. But, he also told her stories about his life, stories that Raya normally answered with stories of her own. There was nothing for them to do but talk and so talk they did. They talked and Raya realized things. She realized that Tormund wasn't much different from her father. He was loyal and honest and he was protective of his daughter. He respected the old ways even when he didn't always agree with them. He was a trusted advisor and respected warrior.

Raya looked up from her leg and at the entrance of the cave where Tormund stood, his back to the cold.

"We're moving," he closed in on her, offering his hands.

Raya thought about that. They were moving but for what?

"The storm-,"

"Has passed," he interrupted, "The wind is not blowing. The sun is up. We move now."

Raya readjusted herself and offered her hands to Tormund who pulled her to her feet. She could stand now. That was an accomplishment in itself. Tormund watched her as she leaned partially against the cave wall. She seemed to have good enough footing. He collected up her bag and handed it to her before kneeling in front of her and snatching up the discarded fabric he had thrown around. Raya slid her arms in to her bag as Tormund tightly wrapped her leg. She resisted the urge to complain.

Tormund headed to the front of the cave and began to free the blanket that hung there. Raya limped her way after him and reached him just as he'd began to throw his blades in to a pouch on his person.

He had been right. He'd freed the blanket and wind hadn't seeped in to their small getaway. Tormund shoved the blanket in to Raya's bag and handed her the bow and small quiver that had been housed there.

"It wouldn't all fit," he answered her answered question.

Raya put the quiver over her shoulder before jamming the bow in to it.

Tormund turned his back to her and dropped to a crouching position. She didn't need to be instructed. She made her way on to Tormund's back and he lifted her easily before walking out of the shade of the cave. The sunlight felt amazing on Raya's skin. It wasn't as cold as she imagined it would be. She clung to Tormund's neck as he sloshed through the snow.

"Where are we going?" Raya asked softly.

"Down the mountain," Tormund answered, "The Free Folk are going down the mountain. We'll beat them there hopefully. If not, I know where to meet them," Tormund readjusted his hold on Raya, causing her to rise higher on his back, "We meet them at the bottom or we're going to the wall on our own, little Stark."

X

Jon had nothing to tell Ygritte. He wasn't angry with her. No, that wasn't the case at all. He was angry with himself. He was angry that he had been separated from his sister, his eldest sister, the one that was only this side of the wall to ensure his safety. She was gone and nothing had been left but a bag with the remains scattered about. A damned storm had passed through lessening any scent that he might have hoped River or Ghost could have gotten. Raya had vanished and he knew for a fact that she was injured. He had seen her crimson blood littering the snow. She was injured and alone during a snow storm. There was a chance that his sister would die. There was a chance that he would never see Raya again and the last words they had spoken to each other had not been words of admiration.

He tried not to talk about her despite the fact that she littered every single thought that made its way through his head. He knew talking about it would cause Ygritte to feel horrible and he didn't need the added stress. He thought about going down the way he'd seen the bag. He had. But then what? He knew nothing of these parts. He didn't know which way she'd gone or if she was even still breathing. For all he knew she could have been buried in snow by now. He wanted to search for her anyway.

He knew that he couldn't.

He loved Raya. He loved Raya far more than anyone thought that he did. Hell, he now realized that he loved her more than he'd even known. He knew that he was fond of his sister. He knew that he cared about her and that he would do anything for her. She was his flesh and blood. She accepted him and never once turned her nose up at him. She defended him. She cared about his wellbeing, not simply the physical but the emotional and mental as well. Raya was not just family. She was a friend and in her loss, he had gained more determination than ever.

He had two lives resting on his shoulder now; Raya and Half Hand. They had died for him. They had not done so without purpose. He was going to do whatever it took to save his brethren. He was a man of the Night's Watch and he would hold the wall at all costs.

He owed that to Half Hand. He owed that to Raya.

X

Raya was uncomfortable. She wasn't sure how long Tormund had walked, but she was sure that her legs were beginning to ache from attempting to hold on to his large frame. She was sure his elbows were digging in to her arms from the way she was positioned and she was constantly sliding down his back and having to be adjusted.

When Tormund paused Raya lifted her head off of his back for the first time in a while. She looked over his shoulder. Men. There were men in front of them.

"Tormund," Raya whispered his name, "They- They're gray."

"They're dead," he deadpanned.

They were unmoving, their skin white-gray and seemingly wrinkled and stretched across their skin giving them a mummified appearance. They had white hair, their heads facing the opposite direction of Tormund and Raya.

"Draw your bow girl," it was whisper from the mouth of Tormund Giantsbane, something Raya thought she would never live to hear.

She did as she was told. Tormund adjusted his hold on her. She nocked the bow and arrow and took a deep breath.

Three heads snapped to the side to glare at Raya Stark and her mind went blank as her mouth fell open.

White Walkers. They were real. They were real and they were mere yards away from her. Her breathing started to shallow. They were frozen in place, their eyes piercing through her. Tormund bent his knees and then stood back up twice quickly waking Raya from her trance. He began to take slow steps backwards.

She aimed her arrow. She took a breath.

The White Walkers moved.


	10. Chapter 10

_And suddenly you know… It's time to start something new and trust the magic of beginnings. -Meister Eckhart_

Raya was sliding off of Tormund's back. She was sliding and those people- those **things** \- they were closing in on them. She didn't know where Tormund found his strength or his speed at a time like this. Hell, she wasn't sure how he could think critically.

"There's," Tormund paused to take a few quick breaths, "an arrow in your quiver," he let out another breath, "It has a black ribbon. Shoot it," he huffed and readjusted his hold on me, "Shoot it and damn it girl you better not miss."

Raya looked around frantically. She was hanging on to Tormund by only her legs. She dug around in the quiver until she saw it, the one arrow with a small black piece of cloth tied to it. She yanked it out and looked at it. She really looked at it. It was the strangest shaped arrow point she had ever seen. It was shockingly small, yet sharp.

"Your arrow-"

"Dragonglass!" he snapped, "Shoot."

Raya looked over her shoulder. She closed the arrow and bow in one hand and pushed her hood off of her head with the other.

"There's only one arrow!" she snapped back.

"Then make it count."

Raya licked her lips. Her heart was pounding. It was pounding so loudly she was sure that he could hear it. The White Walkers looked like they were walking. They looked like any other person walking except for the fact that they seem to glide. They seemed to glide and they seemed to close in on them. They were getting closer. They were a few yards away. Raya knew she could hit one. She didn't have a choice. She had to hit one.

"Can you run?" Tormund asked, his grip tightening on her thighs.

Raya thought about it. She thought about it quickly. This was life or death.

"Yes," it was a lie.

She wasn't sure if she could run, but she was sure that not both of them needed to die here. Tormund had people. He had a daughter and he had men and women that followed his lead. She was already suspected dead by everyone on the other side of the wall anyway. She had probably been mourned by now. Jon would be the only one to know the truth. He was strong. He was a survivor. He would make it. He had brothers to live for now.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes!" Raya nocked her arrow and aimed.

She pulled her arrow back and then took a deep breath before releasing. She had done good. Her arrow had hit its mark. She'd aimed for the biggest one. It hadn't been a hard choice. The bigger the target was the better chance she had of hitting it. She had been right. The arrow had hit.

She watched. Raya watched as the White Walker looked like he was turning in to an ice statue. She watched as he paused in mid stride and then shattered. She was truly seeing this in person.

"I hit one!" she said excitedly, "I did it!"

Tormund paused. He paused and Raya looked behind her to gage the distance between them and their hunters.

It took her a while to realize that she was sliding off of his back.

"Run!" Tormund screamed.

And Gods did she run. She had heard enough. Her leg stung but she was mostly fine. She didn't know if her will to live was actually that strong. She didn't know if her ancestors had somehow lent her the strength. She didn't know if it was the adrenaline coursing through her body or if that horrible ointment Tormund had applied to her wound had truly made that big of a difference. She wasn't sure where she found the speed, but she knew that she had never run faster. Her hair flew behind her with the wind that had suddenly decided to make an appearance.

She looked back to see how far she'd gone and how far behind her Tormund was. She was sure she hadn't seen him pass her.

She paused. He was not behind her. He was running in the opposite direction. He was running towards the White Walkers. Raya looked both ways. She tried to think quickly. She was panicking. One of the White Walkers was heading in towards him. The other was continuing to move straight. He was moving towards her. She cursed. She couldn't help Tormund. She wished that she could, but she couldn't.

She couldn't even save herself.

X

Tormund ran. He ran and glanced quickly between the two White Walkers. Only one of them seemed to be interested in his whereabouts. That meant that the other one was after Raya. He needed to move quickly. He felt the snow start to fall on to his beard. This was not what he needed, but he pushed his complaints away. This was survival of the fittest. He had been born and trained to survive. He hadn't been killed by some of the strongest, biggest, most agile men he had ever known. He wouldn't be chopped down by some undead cunts.

He ran faster and then dropped backwards, sliding across the ice-covered ground. He grabbed the arrow Raya had shot from where it was stuck in the snow and rolled on to his stomach to jump back to his feet. He stabbed the dragon glass through the nearest White Walker and didn't pause to watch it shatter.

Raya was standing some yards away as if she'd been frozen in place. She looked like she was somewhere far away. She was zoned out. The White Walker was closing in on her and she was standing there. He ran faster. That stupid idiot girl was standing there like an animal watching its predator close in on it with not one care about its life. The White Walker reached an arm out towards Raya and Tormund jumped for him, his arm outstretched.

The White Walker shattered before Tormund could even get in to contact with it and he crashed in to Raya knocking her to the ground.

X

Raya was sure she had seen what she'd thought she'd seen. She'd seen that red smoke again. She'd seen red smoke again and she'd seen a child. She had seen a child that looked nothing like a child, a child that looked like something she had never seen before. She had seen a child no older than Rickon and Bran shoot an arrow in to a White Walker and disappear. She was sure of it. She would bet her life on it. She knew that she had seen a child vanish. She had watched him vanish. It was mere seconds before Tormund had knocked all of the wind out of her lungs, but she was sure all the same.

She laid stretched out on her back in the snow. She was going insane. She was losing her mind. She was seeing White Walkers and children that looked nothing like children. It was the blood loss. It had to be the blood loss. She didn't bother moving. She took quick shallow breaths. Her heart was beating through her chest and her ears were ringing. She couldn't hear a word that Tormund was saying but she knew that he was knelt over her legs. He'd picked himself up off of her and he was screaming at her. She couldn't register the words that were coming out of his mouth. She knew that he was visibly upset. He was shaking her, shaking her and yelling.

He looked at her. Tormund looked at her in a way she didn't think he had ever looked at her before and she thought that maybe, just maybe, he almost looked worried.

Raya blinked her eyes a few times. It had started to snow around them. She was getting cold again… her back anyway. She was glad that she could at least physically feel something. She was sure she would start shaking soon. Tormund was freeing her of her backpack and forcing the bow and arrow out of her hands. She hadn't even realized that she was still holding them. She knew that he was throwing that blanket over her shoulders and pulling her hood back over her head. He sat back and grabbed Raya by her shoulders and he did the one thing he could think of. He began to shake her again.

X

Jon Snow looked around and held down his first reflex which was to throw up the contents of his stomach. He was standing in the center of a circle made out of the body parts of horses, partially hidden beneath the white blanket of snow and partially visible. He could see body parts as far as his eyes allowed him to, body parts that eventually turned in to the full bodies of horses. He couldn't think of someone that would murder their own horse especially in this sort of weather. He couldn't think of any sane man that would drag their dead horse around to make damned circles in the snow. What purpose did it serve?

"Always the artist," Mance Ryder said to no one in particular.

Jon looked up and at the elder man and then to Ygritte whose eyes were glued to Mance. She had a stronger stomach than most. He had to give her that.

Jon was thankful for the snow and the cold. The smell of death wasn't a welcoming one and he was glad that it wasn't something that had choked them as soon as they'd entered the winds.

"All of these horses," Mance continued to mumble to himself.

"And no men," Jon finished.

He'd been beside Mance every chance that he'd gotten. When the man had decided to venture forward it was Jon, Ygritte, Orell and the Lord of Bones who had run to volunteer.

Orell was a seemingly older man, older than Jon anyway. He was small in stature with long, thin, unevenly cut black hair. He wore a hat instead of a hood. He could warg like Raya. Jon had seen him do it. He didn't use a direwolf. He used an eagle.

The man had warged for an extended amount of time and then come back to, to tell everyone in attendance that he had seen dead crows.

That's what they were. Jon's thoughts paused as he looked at the older man. Dead crows. These were the horses that belonged to his brothers.

Mance looked at the younger man before turning back to Orell.

"You said there were dead crows!" Ygritte accused closing in on Orell.

"There was," he said simply, calmly.

Ygritte looked around at the dead horses again and Jon closed in on her. He set a hand on her shoulder.

"How many men were here?" Mance turned to face Jon and Ygritte.

"About 300," Jon answered almost instantly.

"And do you know what those men are now?"

Jon's hand fell from Ygritte's shoulder. He didn't comment.

"Meat for their army," Mance sighed and Jon didn't know whether he meant the horses or the 300 men.

"Do you think anyone got away?" Jon asked.

He felt Ygritte and Orell look at him.

"It's not impossible," Mance shrugged, "They took a big gamble coming north. And they lost. Now their best fighting men are dead and whether he's lord commander of the Night's Watch or a blue eyed corpse," Mance turned his back to Jon and looked around, "he's a long way from home," he crossed his arms over his chest, "Ygritte, if Tormund doesn't meet up with us in 3 days you're scaling the wall! Pick your top 20 men and take that one," he motioned to Jon.

Jon froze. The Free Folks planned on climbing and crossing the wall.

X

Raya had regained her hearing. She now heard everything at once.

"You stupid idiot girl!" Tormund shook her, "Have you lost you damned mind?"

He was still yelling. Raya wondered how Tormund managed to even still have a voice. She blinked her eyes at him.

"I'm," she paused and restarted, "I'm sorry, Tormund."

He let out a gust of air and then smiled at her, a big wide toothed smile that made Raya smile in return.

"We did it," he chuckled, "We fucking did it," he collapsed backwards in to the snow relieved.

He was right. They'd been faced with White Walkers and they had lived to tell the tale… hopefully. Raya looked around and then at a sprawled out Tormund.

"We need to move," she pulled herself to her feet.

The snow was still falling, but it was nothing too severe.

"We survived," Tormund thought out loud.

He looked up at Raya. She was smiling as she shoved her blanket in to her bag. He watched her dig around in the snow. He knew what it was she was looking for. He raised one of his arms to show her the arrow with the black ribbon tied to the end still in his hand. She nodded once and then stood above him.

"We need to move," she repeated.

"Yeah, yeah," Tormund grumbled and sat up, "I just needed to catch my breath," he smiled again and Raya was genuinely smitten.

For someone who joked as much as Tormund she was surprised to realize that this was probably the most genuine smile she had ever seen on his face. She looked at him and her smile traveled up to her eyes.

"What?" Tormund raised an eyebrow at her.

"You look happy," she said simply.

"I am!" Tormund handed the arrow up to her and she jammed it in to the quiver over her shoulder, "I'm so happy I could kiss you, little Stark," he laughed.

"Okay."

Raya paused. She paused and she thought about her response. She should have thought about it before she let it escape her mouth. She hadn't. She never thought anything through. She cursed in her head and she knew that she was blushing and she didn't just mean her cheeks. She knew that a slight red was entering her checks and the stretch of her neck. She was glad that Tormund couldn't see it. She pulled her hood down on to her head more hoping that it would cast a shadow over her face big enough to hide the embarrassment she knew was there. Tormund laughed. He hopped to his feet and shook his head in disbelief.

"Can you walk?" he asked.

Raya nodded. She didn't trust her voice or her words to not betray her.

"Good," he said gruffly.

Tormund Giantsbane closed in on Raya and stuck his head out, craned his head down and ever so lightly brushed his lips against hers. Raya froze and Tormund laughed again before grabbing her hand in one of his and starting a swift decent down the mountain dragging her along.

"We don't need to get caught out in the open at night, little Stark!" he boasted loudly.


	11. Chapter 11

_Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment. -Buddha_

Raya Stark was smitten.

She didn't know why that was, but there was no other way to explain it. She was a girl of seventeen name days and she had never been kissed until him… until Tormund Giantsbane. Surely, it hadn't been a real kiss. It had been more of a peck not even built on affection. It had been built on nothing more than his need to mess with her head. Raya continued to tell herself that. Tormund was messing with her. That was what he did.

"Keep up, little Stark!" Tormund called without looking back.

Raya resisted the urge to roll her eyes. She simply walked a little faster. She and Tormund were moving non stop. Her leg had yet to hurt to where she couldn't and even if it did she was sure she would hold her tongue and take the pain. They both refused to rest. They weren't alone on this mountain. They had seen White Walkers. They didn't need to be off on their own any longer than necessary. They had agreed on that. Tormund had claimed that they were making good time. Raya was inclined to believe them. They had walked through the night and a new day was nearly passed. She was exhausted, but her will to live was stronger than her need to sleep.

She settled in to a pace that made her steps match his.

"Do you see that?" Tormund pointed somewhere ahead of them.

Raya shaded her eyes as she looked. She paused.

She could see it in the distance, a camp. A large goofy smile spread across her face. The tents were miniscule, but she knew that they could be there in a hour or so, maybe sooner.

"How is your leg?" he asked for what felt like the hundredth time.

"Fine, Tormund," Raya snapped, "You can stop asking me that all the time."

"Well enough to climb the wall?"

"Excuse me?" Raya looked at Tormund.

"You heard me."

"You're climbing the wall?!" Raya's voice raised a pitch.

"We're," he stressed the word, "climbing the wall," he looked down at her and smiled, "if you think you're up to it."

"I'm up to it," Raya crossed her arms over her chest and looked back straight ahead, "That's what this has all been about? Climbing the wall?"

"You saw what I saw."

"The White WalkerS?"

"The White Walkers," Tormund nodded, "They kill and they turn the dead in to a marching man in their army," he nudged Raya, "We don't give a damn about the lands on the other side of the wall. We just want our people on the other side of it before the long night comes."

Raya understood. She understood all too well. They were attempting to save their people. They just wanted to be safe. They wanted to be out of the grasp of the White Walkers and that damned wall was in their way. They wanted to save the lives of women and children and elderly and the Night's Watch wouldn't let them in. She paused. Jon. Jon would betray them… and they only wanted to live.

"I can climb the wall," Raya assured, "And I'll do whatever I can to help you Tormund Giantsbane," she swore, "I owe you my life."

The bigger man scoffed and Raya nudged him playfully before breaking in to a light jog.

"Come along, Tormund!" she called over her shoulder, "We have people to save!"

Tormund shook his head. She was a child this girl. He had to keep reminding himself of that.

Raya jogged through the snow as he watched. She was a child and she vexed him to no ends. He wasn't sure why or what it was about this girl. She got under his skin. He wanted to help her. He wanted to protect her. That was why he was taking her over the wall. He would be damned if he left her with the rest of them all on her own. She was a small, energetic thing with a mouth on her that did not say that she was from a well-respected house of the seven kingdoms, but an air and confidence about her that did. She was attractive and seemingly kind, but she also had a temper when it came to her brother that Tormund was sure leaked over in to her other family members and things that she felt passionate about. She was a passionate person. She didn't get scared easily. She didn't seem to be scared of him when they'd first met anyway. Raya was something and Tormund liked her. He liked her and he felt nothing close to guilt about the entire thing. She was far older than many of the married women where she was from. Girls younger than her married men far older than him.

But, Raya Stark was just that, a Stark. Starks married noblemen. No matter what Raya said she was a Stark through and through and Tormund was sure that she would stand with her traitor brother… even if he did hope that he was wrong.

X

Jon took a frustrated breath and resisted the urge to yell at Ygritte as she ran out of his reach. She was so playful lately and it was making him insane. He knew that she was trying to cheer him up about Raya.

There was no way for that to happen.

He appreciated the thought and the fact that she cared even a smidge enough to attempt to make him feel better. He honestly did, but this wouldn't bring his sister back and he was tired of frolicking through the snow chasing after her.

"Ygritte!" Jon yelled her name as she ran in to a cave, "Seven hells!"

She didn't answer. Jon looked both ways and let his head fall backwards. He let out an irritated growl and then pushed forward and after her.

"Ygritte!" he yelled again.

He rushed through the cave and then slid to a stop when he saw it. It was a hot springs with a waterfall running through it.

Ygritte wedged her torch between some rocks and then looked up at Jon, a smile on her face. He shook his head partly in annoyance and partly in amusement. This girl would be the death of him. She started to remove her shoes and throw them over her head.

"Are you still a crow?" she questioned.

"What?" Jon paused.

That was not a question he had expected Ygritte of all people to ask. They had been spending more time together, way more. She was still a hard ass and she still belittled him, but it was obvious that it wasn't from a dark place… to him anyway.

"You have to prove yourself," she shrugged, "You swore some vows," she began to undo her overcoat, "And I want you to break them. I want you to see me," she dropped it to the ground and removed her top, "all of me."

Ygritte pulled her trousers down as Jon stood frozen before her. She was doing this. She had stripped herself of all clothes in front of him.

"What are you doing?" Jon resisted the urge to avert his eyes.

Ygritte closed in on him.

"We shouldn't," Jon tried to reason with her again.

"We should," she reached a hand up and closed it in his hair.

Jon licked his lips. Ygritte tilted her head back. Jon took a quick shallow breath as Ygritte inched towards him.

Their lips crashed in to each other.

 **A/N: MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!**


	12. Chapter 12

" _You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment. Fools stand on their island of opportunities and look toward another land. There is no other land; there is no other life but this." ― Henry David Thoreau_

 _ **A/N: FLASHBACK WILL BE IN ITALICS! Thank you and happy reading!**_

Tormund stroked his beard as he watched Mance walk back and forth in his tent. He and Raya had made good time getting to camp and he had went directly to Mance without a thought of much else. He had been faced with white walkers. Sure, it had only been three, but he had gotten lucky. Their people had gotten lucky. They didn't have time to be messing around the irrelevant things. He was glad it hadn't taken him too long to reunite with his people.

He had rushed through the process and he had pushed himself and Raya probably harder than he should have, but a little discomfort was a small price to pay for the lives of thousands. Despite, their rushing he still felt like he knew the girl better than he had before.

 _Raya had laid her head against the back of the cave wall, both of her hands gripping on to her leg as she bit her lip in obvious pain. She hadn't complained about it yet surprisingly._

 _"Girl," Tormund called her out of catatonic state._

 _Her head snapped up and she looked at him. She pushed her hair back with a hand and folded up her uninjured leg._

 _"It were another winter, colder even than the one I spent inside that giant, and snowing day and night, snowflakes as big as your head, not these little things. It snowed so hard the whole village was half buried. I was in me Ruddy Hall, with only a cask of mead to keep me company and nothing to do but drink it. The more I drank the more I got to thinking about this woman lived close by, a fine strong woman with the biggest pair of teats you ever saw. She had a temper on her, that one, but oh, she could be warm too, and in the deep of winter a man needs his warmth," he looked out towards the snow, "The more I drank the more I thought about her, and the more I thought the harder me member got, till I couldn't suffer it no more. Fool that I was, I bundled meself up in furs from head to heels, wrapped a winding wool around me face, and set off to find her. The snow was coming down so hard I got turned around once or twice, and the wind blew right through me and froze me bones, but finally I come on her, all bundled up like I was," he chuckled, "The woman had a terrible temper, and she put up quite the fight when I laid hands on her. It was all I could do to carry her home and get her out of them furs, but when I did, oh, she was hotter even than I remembered, and we had a fine old time, and then I went to sleep. Next morning when I woke the snow had stopped and the sun was shining, but I was in no fit state to enjoy it. All ripped and torn I was, and half me member bit right off, and there on me floor was a she-bear's pelt. And soon enough the free folk were telling tales of this bald bear seen in the woods, with the queerest pair of cubs behind her," he chuckled and turned back to Raya's wide eyed face "I wish that I could find her again. She was fine to lay with, that bear. Never did a woman give me such a fight, nor such strong sons neither."_

 _"Tormund," Raya said his name slowly, "why would you tell me such a story?"_

 _He shrugged._

 _"You asked after my wife."_

 _"But that wasn't a tale of your wife."_

 _"Nay, it wasn't," he chuckled, "but a tale of one girl is as good as a tale of any other."_

 _Raya laughed. She toppled over laughing. She clutched her stomach and laughed. She wasn't sure why it was so funny, but it was. It was hilarious._

 _"You're turn," Tormund slapped his meaty thigh and stared at the girl._

 _"Okay," Raya nodded, "It was another winter," she started her story like his, "and I had just entered my womanhood when I was told I was to wed Jaime Lannister," she sat up taller, "He was handsome in the face, sure, but he was in no way deserving of a Stark to bare his children. Father had the Lannisters over quite frequent after the arrangement of our marriage. It was a strange thing to be forced to be so… close with them. Jaime was always attempting to be this great man of many feats and it irritated me and my brothers to no end. So, I decided that I would take no part in marrying such a strange man of such little honor. I'll have you know that," she paused to think of a small lie to start her story, "So, I decided to test this man's desire to marry me. So, I went off and I," she paused, "slept with another! And was purposely caught! It was the scandal of the north!" she laughed._

 _Tormund's loud laugh bounced off of the cave walls._

 _"Let me guess with the stable boy?" he raised an eyebrow._

 _"Of course not!" Raya fake pouted, "With his twin sister of course! The Queen of the seven kingdom welcomed me readily in to her bed! That was why it never left the north. She would behead anyone foolish enough to speak of such a thing. And Jaime was so well embarrassed by having found his lover and the girl he was to wed intertwined that he never mentioned it to another," Raya cast a look at Tormund._

 _"The wolf that tamed the lion?" he laughed heartily again._

 _"I've been known to tame a beast or two."_

 _"Ever a wildling?" Tormund teased._

 _"I would never back down from a challenge. Was that a challenge, Tormund Giants-babe?"_

 _"Raya Stark, Lady of Winterfell and Teller of Tall Tales," Tormund shook his head._

 _"The tallest!" she admitted, "but I had one hell of a person to teach me!"_

 _"Put no blame on me, Little Stark. Your brother Jon would-"_

 _"Take your cock," she inserted a line she'd heard Tormund mutter several times._

 _"Aye!" Tormund agreed, "especially if he thought I'd taught you words like that!"_

 _"I learn what I want! I am a free woman!"_

 _Tormund had shaken his head and laughed and Raya's leg had all but been forgotten._

Mance cleared his throat and Tormund looked up at him.

"Your head seems somewhere else," he observed aloud.

"Nay," Tormund shook his head and smirked, "I just got tired of waiting for you to open your damned mouth."

Mance smiled.

"You're going over the wall soon, with a few good men and the Snow boy."

"Aye," Tormund nodded, "I'm taking the Stark girl along as well."

"The Stark girl?" Mance looked Tormund in the face and made a few slow steps towards him, "You fancy her?"

"The girl is a girl. I have five children, four of 'em her elder."

"She's from a kingdom where that doesn't matter," Mance shrugged and then scoffed, "You and the Stark girl…" he let his voice trail off, "and Ygritte and the Snow boy… What am I going to do?"

"Nothing," Tormund said instantly, "Ygritte has everything under control."

"Ladies have nothing under control when their hearts get involved," Mance took a deep breath, "If you do have feelings for this girl, find out if she shares them. If you have the girl, you have the crow."

"And you don't trust Ygritte to capture your crow for you?" Tormund rolled his eyes.

"I don't trust the crow to not catch her back."

"And if the Stark girl captures me?" Tormund raised an eyebrow and Mance chuckled.

"The Stark girl wants to be free," he shrugged, "She would stay this side of the wall with us without the subtle seduction if her brother truly wanted to be free. She just needs a reason to stay besides the promise of freedom," Mance closed in on Tormund, "and we all see the way you look at her, old friend," he chuckled, "This is in no way an order. You don't order free men. This is a simple… suggestion," he pat Tormund on the back and then walked around him and paused at the flap of the tent, "and you never denied fancying her."

Tormund took a deep breath. Mance chuckled and let himself out.

Tormund didn't like the way Mance was preparing to play the game, but he couldn't say he put the man at a fault. If he thought it something to help his people, he was willing to do it and one heartbroken girl wouldn't stop him. Tormund respected that. But he also respected Raya from what he knew of her. She was light on the eyes and she had a mouth and personality on her. She was strong and strong willed. That was enough for him to take a wife there… but she was also a noblewoman and they focused on other things; names, looks and honor. He wasn't the type of folk a girl like Raya would fall head over heels for.

He was perfectly fine with that. He wasn't looking for a wife. No, not at all. He didn't need Raya to fall magically in love with him. But, he still hoped that she would remain with the lot of them instead of returning home with Jon… and he was relatively certain that Jon would, in fact, return to his brothers. He didn't know the lad very well, but he knew a crow when he saw one and this boy was crow through and through. Tormund knew for a fact that Ygritte wasn't as stupid as to believe that he had changed his entire belief system in a matter of nights. No, of course Ygritte was smarter than that. Tormund thought about it. Maybe she wasn't… Maybe she was blinded by her feelings. Damn it. Mance had probably been right. That was why Mance led them. He had smarts about him and he could read people. Ygritte had probably fallen for the crow boy.

Tormund turned on his heels and stalked out of the tent in search of ale or mead.

Women and their hearts caused quite a lot of issues.

X

Raya hugged herself, her arms thrown around her body partially to keep warm and partially to keep her hands from shaking. She was angry. She was so very angry.

Jon had been nowhere to be found. She and Tormund had faltered in to camp a little before the fall of the sun and there had been no Jon or Ygritte to be spoken of. She had been reunited with River and Ghost rather quickly however. She and Tormund had been given food and then Tormund had been dragged off and towards Mance's tent where he had stayed for quite a while. Raya had gotten a tent put up for herself, but hadn't been able to sleep, not in the least. So she had wandered through the camp, making small trades for things that she had in her bag that Tormund had told her to keep. She had made trades and then retreated to her tent with River so that she could warg just for a small time.

A small time turned in to many hours and when she entered her body again night had fallen. She had stumbled clumsily out of her tent and found an array of wildlings surrounding a fire among them, Tormund, Ygritte and Jon his arm around the previously mentioned. Raya had entered the circle of people simply and watched her brother light up at the sight of her. She had given him the darkest and nastiest look that she could muster before turning her head away from him. She had been gone, missing, for days and he hadn't come to see her upon learning of her return. No. Instead he was enjoying a fire with the girl of his interest, the wildling girl that he was sure to betray later down the line. Oh, how she loved her brother's priorities.

She squeezed her arms and pushed down the spewing need to walk over and hit her idiot brother behind the head. She punched the thought down repeatedly. Even if he did deserve it, they had not been on speaking terms when she had fallen down the mountain and she didn't want to start an argument in front a vast number of people they knew nothing of.

Raya took a few quick breaths to calm her heart rate and then yanked her hood on, hoping that it would cast a shadow over her face. She didn't want to have a visible scowl shown. She had just returned. She should have just been thankful that she was even still alive.

Raya spun around and glared as her hood was yanked off of her head. Tormund laughed at her, his usual earth shaking laugh that automatically made her laugh in return. She wasn't sure how someone could hear Tormund laugh and not enjoy it… and he did it so frequently! She hadn't noticed it throughout the small number of days they had spent together but she considered Tormund a thing close to a friend. She elbowed him and he continued to laugh. She rolled her eyes and pouted as Tormund was hit on the back by a number of wildlings and hit them back in return.

 _Raya had been laid out on her back, the cave in a pitch black darkness. She had been fumbling with her fingers, hoping for sleep to take her. Any hope for sleep she'd had was thrown to the wind when Tormund had coughed and she'd nearly jumped out of her skin._

 _"Tormund?" she'd whispered in to the night._

 _"What?"_

 _"Do you have sons?"_

 _"What?" he repeated his earlier questions._

 _"Sons," Raya said softly, "Do you have any?"_

 _"Four."_

 _"Four?" her voice squeaked._

 _"Four."_

 _"All with your wife?"_

 _"Aye," he sighed, "I'm the father to four sons and a daughter. My eldest son, Toregg, is a foot taller than me, twice as good looking but half as cunning. My youngest son, Dryn is as cunning as he is he short, a full foot shorter than I," he paused as if thinking, "Funny how that worked… Another son, Dormund, was killed during battle and my final son, Torwynd is..." he thought about it, "me."_

 _"You?" Raya questioned._

 _"He was made in my image that boy and he got all 'er my good traits and the bad ones too."_

 _"And they all travel with Mance?"_

 _"Aye."_

 _Raya tried to think about if she'd ever seen boys that looked like Tormund. She hadn't had any reason to look for them in all honesty. She would in the future, however._

 _"Are you close with your sons?"_

 _"They aren't much of men," he admitted, "but they'd been me little boys once, and I love 'em."_

 _Raya nodded at that even though she knew that he couldn't see her._

 _Silence took over between them as both of their thoughts wandered._

 _"Stark?" Tormund called._

 _"Yes?"_

 _"Are you the wife of the king slayer?"_

 _"No!" Raya said quickly, "He… didn't need me anymore."_

 _"His loss, girl."_

 _Raya opened her mouth and then closed it. She was glad Tormund couldn't see her because she was sure she was blushing. That was the closest she would ever get to a compliment from this man. Raya thought her words out carefully._

 _"Tormund…"_

 _Raya waited… and waited._

 _Tormund Giantsbane let out a snore like no other._

Raya awoke from her thoughts at the feeling of Tormund tapping her.

"We need to speak," he told her shortly, "tonight."

Raya nodded.

 **A/N: Chapter dedicated to** **sarah0406** **who left the review saying, " *sigh* I would have loved to read the stories Tormund and Raya shared when they were in the cave." This wasn't much, but I didn't want to go backwards in the story, but I added two little flashbacks that I hope you like!**

 **THANK YOU to everyone for all of the love! I appreciate every click, follow, favorite and review! Thank you if you've come this far and decided this fic wasn't for you. Thank you for simply passing through!**


	13. Chapter 13

_Everytime you get upset at something, ask yourself if you were to die tomorrow, was it worth wasting your time being angry? -Robert Tew_

Jon had gathered up his courage and mentally prepared himself for the impending fight, and then he had made his way over to his younger sister, grabbed her by her elbow and lightly ushered her away from the circle of wildlings that enclosed the fire. He had attempted to not draw attention to himself, but Ygritte was on his heels anyway. He led a rigid Raya towards the tent she and Ygritte would be sharing before enclosing her in one quick, stiff and awkward hug.

"I'm glad that you're okay," he said shortly.

"Thank you," she looked at her brother and then to Ygritte.

"Well, how was it?" Ygritte asked.

"How was what?" Raya pulled her hood on to her head.

"Your time alone with Tormund."

"It was okay?" Raya tilted her head to one side, "Are you insinuating something?"

"Only the obvious," Ygritte chuckled and looked to Jon whose eyes hadn't left Raya, "The two of you seem comfortable," she continued.

"If you're asking if something happened, it didn't," Raya crossed her arms over her chest.

"Did you want it to?"

"Ygritte!" Jon interrupted, "I don't want to hear about what my sister feels in that sort of situation," he reminded, "besides, Raya wouldn't lie with a wilding. She's a-"

"What's wrong with lying with free folk, Jon Snow?" Ygritte put a hand to her hip.

"Nothing!" he said instantly, "but Raya is-"

"Do not say a lady of a great house," Raya interrupted, "You gave up your name and lands and I'm doing so as well."

Jon took a deep breath.

"How is the same thing you've done somehow not good enough for your kin?" Ygritte continued, "You think you're better than us?"

"He's done?" Raya gaped at her brother, "You've lied with a-" she paused, "Ygritte?!" she motioned to her, "You lied with Ygritte! You gave up on our family and confined yourself to that stupid damned wall for a stupid vow that you broke for a girl that you laid with while I was out there," she motioned widly to the tent, "possibly dead. I was running from Night Walkers and- and- and you were sticking your cock-"

"I know where it goes! You don't have to finish that sentence!" Jon snapped.

"Obviously you know where it goes," Raya scoffed.

"Raya, this conversation isn't about me," he pointed out, "It's about you and Tormund."

"There is no me and Tormund!" she clenched her fists angrily, "but there should be," she added as an afterthought, "I should just go off and jump in to his bed. That's what we're doing now isn't it?"

"Shut it!" Ygritte snapped, "Both of you! We are to climb the wall!" she snapped, "We could all die, each and every one of us. Are these the last words you want to speak to each other? You're both like children! Jon, your sister is old enough to marry and bare children and she would be doing anything she pleased on the other side of the wall because you would not be there to watch her. You gave up that right," she hissed, "And you," she turned to Raya, "if you want to be a free woman, then be a free woman. Take care of yourself."

Raya took a deep breath and looked to her brother.

"You're right. I have to look after myself," she nodded once, "I'm all that I have," she turned on her heels and stomped out and Jon glared at Ygritte.

"What the hell was that?"

"Honesty, Jon Snow," she walked towards the tent opening and pulled the flap back, "and you can do worse for a brother by law then Tormund Giantsbane, I swear it to you."

"There will be no union," Jon snapped.

"Close your mouth, Jon Snow, and open your eyes and look the seven hells around. Your sister is smitten with that man and he, her. You stand no chance," she shook her head and let herself out.

She had nothing else to tell him at the current.

X

Raya was slightly angry and slightly upset. Her brother had been missing because he was frolicking with Ygritte. She took a few quick shallow breaths. She shouldn't have been upset. Ygritte had said that they could die any minute. She was right. They could die at any given time. She'd seen the Night Walkers with those eyes she held in her head. It wasn't just a story anymore. It was real. They could all be massacred tonight. Jon had no time to waste before succumbing to how he felt. She couldn't blame him for that. She'd knew they liked each other. It was only a matter of time before something happened between them. She was being selfish. She wouldn't want Jon to be miserable for the rest of his life because she'd died. She wouldn't wish that on her kin. She had reacted without thinking. She always-

Raya's thoughts halted as she ran face first in to someone. She clutched her nose and then looked at the man before her.

Orell.

He didn't speak a work. He motioned for Raya to follow after him and then turned on his heels and started to walk, rather quickly if Raya had anything to say about it.

She looked behind her and then she rushed after him.


	14. Chapter 14

" _Don't you long for something different to happen, something so exciting and new it carries you along with it like a great tide, something that lets your life blaze and burn so the whole world can see it?" ― Juliet Marillier, Son of the Shadows_

Tormund crossed his arms over his chest and took in the sight before him. Raya was seated in the snow, her bum planted on a blanket, her head tilted slightly backwards, her eyes rolled in to the back of her head. Her lips were chapped and her hair had been put in one braid going over one of her shoulders. Each of her hands were on a knee and her breathing was slow and even. Orell was seated beside her, his legs stretched out in front of him as he leaned slightly back. His eyes were also blank.

Tormund had come across the duo a little further in the camp, hidden by a series of tents.

He cast another gaze at the two of them before looking up.

Two birds flew overhead, circling each other and Tormund felt an emotion he wasn't too fond of. It was a little too close to jealousy for his liking. He crouched before the girl and he reached a hand out and pushed her stray strands of hair behind her ear.

Raya's eyes shut quickly and when they opened she hopped backwards and out of his reach, sending snow up from beneath her hands.

"Sorry," she smiled awkwardly, "Sorry," she repeated.

"It's okay," Tormund smiled and offered Raya a hand.

She instantly put her hand in his and he yanked her to her feet.

Raya tilted her head back and looked up and at the sky. Tormund followed suit and they watched. They watched the birds circle each other again before one of them broke out of the circle and began to fly away. They watched the second bird begin to dip down towards them. Raya was enamored. Tormund let his gaze fall and he watched her. She was in awe. She had a big smile on her face and even in the darkness of night he could see her eyes glint. The bird flew down and brushed past Ray's cheek before gliding down and landing in front of Orell who Tormund saw had followed Raya's lead and crashed back in to his body.

Tormund looked from the man to the bird and back at Raya.

"Our talk," he reminded.

"Oh!" Raya shook her head as if to clear it, "Sorry."

"You've said that."

"Of course," Raya sighed, "Sorry."

"Stark!"

"I'm-" she paused and took a deep breath, "Let's talk."

"Walk," he gestured to a direction.

Raya looked over her shoulder and offered a small wave to Orell who nodded once in response before she started in the shown direction. Tormund watched her take the first few steps before looking at Orell.

He didn't like this. He didn't like it at all. The young Stark and the old warg weren't a likely pair. He kept his comments to himself.

He followed after Raya.

He grabbed her elbow before she could walk too far ahead and gently yanked her in the opposite direction before pushing her in to his tent. Tormund looked around before following her in. He gestured to the area he had cleared away for the two of them and Raya sat without question. She yanked her hood off of her head and sniffed. The last thing he needed was for her to catch a cold. He rummaged though his things to collect some mead and then closed in on Raya and plopped down in front of her.

"Where's your head girl?"

Raya scoffed before falling backwards on to the ground with a thump.

"In the clouds," she chuckled.

"You can't go off with men you don't know," he advised, "especially free folk."

"Okay, Tormund Giantsbane," Raya stretched her arms out on either side of her.

"You may find yourself married or worse."

"You know what I absolutely despise?" Raya clenched a fist full of snow in one of her hands and raised it a small distance before dropping it back to the ground, "Men," she chuckled, "They always want to tell me what to do. They command me in words dipped in elegant lines and they deliver it to my naive little ears dressed in concern and care and love," she rolled her eyes at the word, "and they push their agendas on me spoken out loud from their golden tongues that sound like the gospel. They- They," Raya sat up abruptly, "They spew cautionary tales from the mouths of the faces most agreeable to my eye and I fall under their spell as if by some sort of dark blood magic. Women are ruled by their father and brothers and then we're handed off to a husband, who will rule us from then. We are taught to be good mothers and seamstresses and how many stupid candles it takes to care for homes as large as ours. We are taught the stupid history of all of the stupid kingdoms," she was just spewing out everything she'd thought about now, "We are told our place is in the house and Gods forbid we do anything besides raise homes. Women who are warriors are downplayed. Women who are whores or spit on as if it is some horrible thing to welcome a man in to your bed, but brothels still collect enough gold to run because men can welcome whoever they want to bed! A woman who cannot bare a son is no woman, but I am," Raya shook her head and fell back in to the snow again, "I am a woman," she took a deep breath, "and I am of this world like any man before me. I bleed and I make mistakes and I can shoot an arrow. I can feel sadness and passion and anger and I can bring life in to the world. I am an all powerful woman and I am free," Raya chuckled, "Tormund, I am free and," she paused, "if I want to go off with men I don't know, I very well will," she sighed contently.

Tormund paused. Silence spread through the two of them… and then he laughed. He laughed and Raya began to laugh and together they laughed.

Raya sat up again and criss-crossed her legs. She tried to catch her breath as Tormund sat up straight and clapped slowly,

"So, Little Girl Stark, the all powerful free woman and teller of tall tales," he smirked, "Tomorrow we climb the wall."

"Tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow," he nodded once, "Unless you aren't up for it," he took a drink of his mead.

"I do not stray from challenges," Raya crossed her arms.

Tormund nodded at that before holding his horn out toward Raya. She took it and raised the thing to her nose. She sniffed it. She wasn't a fan of the smell.

"Anything in that head of yours you want to vocalize girl?" he scratched his beard, "Since you've gone on a rant with no source."

"Jon," Raya said simply.

Then, she tilted her head back and she drank Tormund's mead. He watched slightly proud and slightly shocked.

"Jon?" he repeated.

"He thinks of me as feeble and weak and..." Raya handed Tormund his emptied horn, "I'm not."

"You aren't," he acknowledged, "Your brother will adjust."

"You think?"

Tormund nodded once wordlessly.

"Raya," Tormund said her name slowly and successfully gained her full attention, "if you don't think you're up to climb the wall with that," he gestured to her leg, "don't bet your life on your pride."

Raya wasn't sure she'd ever heard Tormund call her by her first name more than twice in the time she'd known him.

"Okay," she looked down at her feet, "How many of us are climbing?"

"20 warriors, you and Jon."

"Ygritte?" Raya clarified.

"Yes."

"Orell?"

Tormund looked at Raya as she licked her chapped lips and then pulled the top one between her teeth.

"Yes," he said dryly, "Does the old warg interest you?"

"A little," Raya admitted, "He's the second warg I've ever met and he's older and wiser."

"Old does not always mean wise," Tormund leaned his elbows on his knees.

"I guess you're right," Raya admitted.

"You can't trust everyone nice to you, Stark."

Raya sat quietly as she pondered that. She pushed her stray pieces of hair behind her ears and she took a deep breath.

"Can I trust you, Tormund?" she asked quietly.

This time it was his turn to think his answer through. He scratched the back of his neck and took a deep breath of his own. He liked Raya. He did. Honestly. But, his loyalty lied with his people. Their wellbeing mattered. Their lives mattered. That was his first priority.

"I hope so," he admitted.

Raya nodded at that.

"Get some sleep," Tormund stood to his feet, "We have a rough day ahead of us tomorrow."

"Right," Raya stood to her feet and dusted her bum off.

Raya took a deep breath and then closed in on Tormund.

"If," she paused, "Tormund, if I fall to my death tomorrow-"

"Just pay attention," he cut her off, "You'll do fine."

"You have faith in me?" Raya chuckled.

"A little," Tormund rolled his eyes.

Raya paused. She bit her bottom lip. She was a free woman. She wasn't just repeating it. She meant it. She was going to do whatever it was that she wanted.

"Tormund."

"What do you-"

Raya quickly placed a hand on each of his shoulders, tip-toed, closed her eyes and planted a kiss on Tormund's lips.

She let herself fall from her tip-toes and she smiled primly at Tormund.

"What in the seven hells was-"

"If I die tomorrow I wasn't going to do so with virgin lips, Tormund," she said matter-of-factly, "I wasn't a bear, but," she shrugged for she had lost all of the words she could have possibly said, "goodnight," she settled on the one word finish and walked out of Tormund's tent as quickly as she could.

She mentally cursed when she almost hit _him_.

Jon looked at his younger sister and then at the tent behind her. He took her in, the way she was running her hands along her braid and not looking at him.

"Is that Tormund's tent?" he raised an eyebrow.

"Yes," she said pointedly, "I just," she paused with the most crude words in her mouth, "nothing happened," she admitted, "I was going to say something to get under your skin, but…" she let her words die on her lips.

"I'll walk you to your tent," he threw an arm over her shoulders.

Raya nodded and then started to walk, her brother easily falling in stride with her.

"I'm not angry with you," she said finally.

"Neither am I with you,"

"You deserve to be happy and I hold neither anger nor ill will about you and Ygritte," she admitted, "I was being selfish, but…" Raya squeezed her brother's hand that was on her shoulder, "she will be good for you, brother."

"Maybe," Jon scoffed and then took a deep breath, "I love you, Raya. You are my kin and on this side of the wall, you are the only person that I can trust fully. You have less years than me. I remember you waddling before you could walk and if I can protect you from getting injured or betrayed or," he looked at his sister, "getting your heart broken," he pulled on her braid lightly, "I will try. I will always try. I won't apologize for wanting to protect you. I will not be ashamed of my want to hold on to your virtue."

"I don't need you to hold on to my virtue for me, Jon!" Raya bristled, "I want to make my own decisions."

"Aye, and I am beginning to understand that. Raya, you can do what you'd please and I would love you no less for it at the morrow, I swear it by the old Gods and the new."

"But, you're worried that I'll lie with someone and your nonvirgin sister will never be married off?"

"No," Jon said immediately, "I'm scared your heart will betray you."

"Like you'll betray Ygritte?"

"Maybe," Jon admitted, "I feel things for her… but I know where my loyalty lies," he took a deep breath, "Tormund can feel things for you and still not choose you," Jon tilted his sisters head up and towards him, "Feelings are temporary when you are young. Many arranged marriages end in love."

"And just as many in despair."

"Aye, but I want you to understand that free women and noble women in the kingdoms are not the same. Things done here, can affect your… prospects… should you decide to return home. Do not make life altering decisions because of things you feel for a moment."

"Jon," Raya swallowed and turned to look at her brother, "all we have are these moments that we live in. We could die any moment and it won't matter what our prospects were. We'll never get to see them. All we get to see is what we're seeing now and I've been faced with White Walkers and women that fight along side men and wear trousers," Raya chuckled, "Jon, in this moment I've never been happier and I'm not going back to Winterfell to be pushed off on a man with a great name and a great house and a horrid way of speaking to me. I'm not returning to knitting needles and a place where the best thing I can do is bare an heir. In this moment, I'm alive, Jon. I'm free."

Raya and Jon collectively paused.

"Be cautious," Jon turned his sister to him and yanked her in for a hug, "Be happy."

Raya nodded against his chest.

"Family, duty, honor," she said quietly.

Jon nodded, his chin hitting her forehead with the force.

"Tonight you take your freedom," Jon whispered, "Tomorrow you take the wall."


	15. Chapter 15

_With ordinary talent and extraordinary perseverance all things are attainable. -Thomas Buxton_

Raya looked up at the wall. She had to admit that she was a little worried. She was physically capable… or at least she thought that she was.

"It's just like scaling the walls of Winterfell," Jon's arm, heavily rested around her shoulders.

Raya continued to stare at the wall. She had made arrangements with Mance to look after River and Ghost. She had gotten her leg rebandaged and had gotten as much sleep as she could the night before, which in all honesty, was not much. She took a deep breath. She was going to climb the wall today. She looked both ways, taking in the true height of the thing. She moved her weight from one leg to the other, ignoring the slight sting that traveled up one of her legs. It wasn't as bad as it had been.

"I'm fine, Jon," she playfully brushed her brother's arm off of her shoulder.

"Of course you are," he plucked her on the forehead with a smile and then spun around on his heels as Orell, Ygritte and Tormund closed in on them.

"Orell says there are crows patrolling on the wall," Tormund paused in front of Jon, not even bothering to cast a look at his sister beside him, "Tell me what you know."

Raya opened her mouth and then closed it. She wanted to snap at him, to tell him that you didn't just walk up to people and tell that you needed a favor, phrase that favor like a demand, and expect results. But, Jon was an adult, a grown man and she had herself to worry about. Her brother was not a babe for her to coddle, no not at all. She needed to leave him to his own interactions with the free folk.

Ygritte stood beside Jon as Tomund and Orell stopped across from them. Raya crossed her arms across her chest. Orell and Ygritte both gave Raya small smiles at different times. Jon cast a quick look to his sister before taking a deep breath. Tormund bent down in the snow and freed himself of his bag.

"There are four to a patrol," he said calmly, "two builders to check for structural damage and two rangers to look out for enemies."

"How often do these patrols go out?" Orell asked.

"It varies," Jon shrugged, "If I knew where on the wall we were heading, I could tell you."

"You'd like to know that, huh?" Orell tilted his head slightly.

Ygritte gave him a look and Tormund's gaze stayed fixed on Jon. Raya flipped her braid off of her shoulder so that it would lay down her back.

"There are 19 castles guarding the wall," Orell continued, "How many are manned?"

Jon swallowed and he looked at Raya again, who turned her back to the bunch of them and looked up at the wall again. He cast a look at Ygritte.

"Three."

"You sure about that?" Orell took a step forward and Tormund partially stepped in front of him, his shoulder blocking Orell's chest.

"I'm positive."

"Which three?"

"Castle Black-"

"Aye, Castle Black," Orell snapped, "Everyone knows Castle Black."

"Jon," Tormund cut Orell off, "which others?"

Raya turned her head slightly to the right. She knew that Jon was conflicted. She knew that now was his chance to make a choice and if he lied about the two castles, she would be the only one that knew. They would both have to make their choices. She was hoping Jon wouldn't make the choice for both of them, but if he did, she knew what she would have to do. She understood how hard the decision was for him. She could understand him choosing his brothers over Ygritte. She would choose Robb and the rest of their siblings over any of the nobles that had called themselves smitten with her.

"Eastwatch-by-the-Sea," Jon said quietly, "and the Shadow Tower."

Raya let out a breath she didn't realize she had been holding.

"How many men remain in Castle Black?" Tormund questioned.

"1000."

"Liar," Orell grumbled.

Jon dropped his belongings on to the ground.

"What happens to your eagle after I kill you?" he snapped, "Does he drift away like a kite with his string cut or does he just flop dead to the ground?"

"He's no crow," Ygritte griped, falling in behind Jon as he closed in on Orell.

"Just because you want him inside you don't make him one of us," Orelll looked Ygritte up and down.

Tormund stepped from between the two of them. Raya turned to fully gaze at them again. She took in Jon's shaking hand.

"I'm not afraid of you," Ygritte pulled her sword free.

"And you expect me to be afraid of you?" he pushed her and Jon pushed him back before Ygritte could.

Tormund hopped to his feet.

"Both of you stop it," Raya quickly stomped through the snow and slid to a stop between the two of them, her back to Orell, facing Ygritte and Jon, "We have more pressing issues to deal than the two of you competing for the most attention like children."

Orell took a deep breath and Jon followed suit, Ygritte remained holding her sword.

"Raya-"

"Jon," she cut him off and gave him a look.

She understood him attempting to protect his honor, but his honor meant nothing to the free folk. She couldn't very well have her brother threatening one of their own, especially not when he had come so far and done so much to gain the trust of some of them.

Jon gave Orell a look and Tormund stepped between the siblings, his back pressed against Raya's front.

"I like you boy," he said gruffly, "but if you lie to me I'll pull your guts out through your throat," Tormund grabbed Jon by the top of his coat and Raya sidestepped from behind his large frame.

Ygritte looked from Tormund to Jon and Orell stepped from his previous place as well.

"1,000 men," Jon repeated.

Tormund took a deep breath and then took his hands off of Jon.

"We'll find out soon enough," he looked him up and down and then did the same to Ygritte before moving back towards his bag and kneeling in the snow to dig in it, ignoring the rest of them instantly.

Orell shot the couple before him a look before turning on his heels and heading off. Jon resisted the urge to grind his teeth and headed off in the opposite direction without even looking at his sister. She didn't let that bother her. She knew it wasn't her interfering. It was where she stood, literally. She'd stood with her back to Orell and her chest to her kin. She knew he now thought that she'd taken a side. She trusted herself to calm her brother far easier than she did Orell… and she had slightly chosen a side. She took a deep breath and she and Ygritte's eyes locked on each other. Ygritte sheathed her sword. Raya kept eye contact. Ygritte had stood with Jon instantly. She hadn't.

"Go after him," Raya shrugged slightly.

Ygritte opened her mouth and then closed it and shook her head before heading after Jon.

X

Jon was furious. He was furious with Orell and Ygritte and damn it he was furious with Raya.

His little sister had gone from standing with him at all odds and standing up to Tormund and Mance in their tent to standing against him against some Gods forsaken warg that wanted his head and Ygritte had come to his aid as if he was some maiden in need of defending. They had made him seem weak. He knew that his hand was shaking, but he couldn't stop it.

He knew when Ygritte was at his back, but he couldn't bring himself to look at her.

"You don't need to protect me," he said over his shoulder, focusing on the sloshing around of his footsteps in the snow as a last resort to bring his temper to heed.

"Of course I do," Ygritte responded matter-of-factly, "Who came to you aid when you almost got your throat cut by the Lord of Bones?" she sped up to walk beside him, "Who vouched for you with Mance?" she stepped in front of him and pushed him in his chest with both of her hands… hard, "Stop acting like a little girl, Jon Snow."

"My sister-"

"Is a woman," Ygritte cut him off, "And she stopped blood from being shed because I would have killed Orell where he stood. She was looking out for you," Ygritte pushed Jon again, "You killing a free folk is something that may arise suspicion. Free folk kill each other all the time though. That, Jon Snow, is why I stepped in. And your little kin just did you one even better. She helped you. Just like I always am!" she pushed him once more, "You owe the both of us a debt!"

Ygritte took a breath and then walked around Jon, hitting his elbow with hers as she passed. She had no time to deal with Jon and his issues with his sister. They argued daily and it was vexing. Jon was sensitive when it came to her- Raya.

He would need to get over it.

Ygritte turned back around and walked up to Jon, grabbing his arm.

"We don't have time for you to wallow in your emotions," she said simply and then, she began to drag him back towards their set up.

X

Raya checked her bag over once more just to be sure. Jon and Ygritte had yet to return from their walk. She looked around the small camp that had begun to surround her. Men and women alike were taking their last meal and checking their supplies before the trek started. Raya wiggled her toes and stretched her legs out in front of her.

"It bothering you?" Tormund's voice boomed from somewhere behind her.

"No."

He scoffed as he walked around her. Raya looked up at him. He dropped two bags in front of her and a pair of boots before kneeling.

"Leg?" he gave his knee a pat and Raya kicked her foot on to it without question.

He pushed the leg of her trousers up just far enough to see her gash.

"It's fine."

"It looks better," he nodded.

"Because it feels fine," she yanked her foot out of his lap and pushed the leg of her pants back down.

Tormund took a breath before grabbing her leg by the ankle and picking it back up to his knee. He pushed her clothing out of the way again, rougher this time.

"Don't be difficult, Stark," he growled.

"I don't need to be looked after, Giantsbane."

"You do," he said simply.

Tormund sat fully in the snow, still holding on to her leg. He pulled the smaller of the two bags closer and pulled it open. He released some leaves and a small cone like fixture along with stray clothes that had been torn in to shreds, obviously by hands. He freed some of the strange liquid from the cone and pressed it against Raya's leg quickly before sticking leaves on to the still wet skin. It stung, but Raya refused to give Tormund that pleasure. He waited a little, his eyes staying on Raya's leg as his head obviously wandered.

"You haven't looked at me all day, Tormund," Raya said simply.

Tormund did not comment. He began to pull the scraps of clothing out of his bag and lined them along her wound, before wrapping her leg up in a solid bandage, tying the knot tighter than he had ever done it before. He looked out and past her, at the free folk wandering around and making last minute changes.

"Have you climbed the wall before?" Raya continued on.

"Half a hundred times," he admitted, a smile playing on his lips, "Are you afraid, girl?"

"Yes," Raya said instantly, "Terrified."

Tormund laughed.

"You'll be fine," he assured her.

He reached to the side and grabbed the boots there and then set them between the two of them.

"They aren't new, but they're good. The grip is better," he nodded once, "Put them on."

The wind whistled around them and Raya pulled her hood on her head before grabbing the boot nearest to her.

"If you don't want to climb the wall, don't climb the wall," Tormund said quietly.

Raya looked up and at him, but his gaze was on the sky, his head tilted back, the sun reflecting off his beard.

"I am climbing that wall," Raya said stubbornly, kicking off her shoes in to the snow, "I do not back down from challenges, Tormund and I would never let Jon go off on his own," she began to shove one of her feet in to a boot.

"He is a grown man."

"He is my brother."

Tormund nodded once at that.

"If he betrays us, I will have to kill him along with any other crow that stands between us and saving the free folk," Tormund looked back down, not allowing his gaze to land on her, instead allowing them to land on her feet.

Raya shoved her other foot in to a boot.

"I know," she said softly.

"And your brother is crow through and through."

Raya's eyes widened slightly and she resisted the sudden urge to cough.

"You brother didn't stop being a crow when he wandered in to Mance's camp and he didn't stop being a crow when he stuck his cock in Ygritte," Tormund grabbed Raya's foot and began to fasten the first boot, "He will betray us and I will end him."

"He cares for Ygritte."

"He is brave and loyal. That makes him stupid," Tormund dropped Raya's foot in to the snow and picked up the other one in order to begin fastening it.

"He loves me," Raya said quietly, her eyes on her hand, where she had begun to dig her nails in to the snow.

"Raya, don't be a fool," Tormund scoffed and dropped her foot in to the snow, "Can you really fight against your kin?"

Raya opened her mouth and then shut it and then opened it again.

"Yes," she decided, "To save so many women and children that have never done wrong, yes," Raya nodded at that and for the first time throughout the day Tormund looked up and at her.

Mance whistled and the camp became a bustling of movement.

Tormund hopped to his feet and then pulled Raya to hers. The people around them began to line up along the wall. Raya could see Jon and Ygritte. She was getting nervous. She was sure her hands were getting sweaty and her breathing was getting shallow.

"Hey," Tormund snapped her out of her trance, "Block everything out when you climb the wall," he craned his head down to talk, "It's a long way up and a long way down. People may fall. You can not save them," Raya took a deep, shaky breath and Tormund closed her face in one of his hands, "When you climb that wall there is just you and me, you understand? Focus on me."

Raya nodded at that.

"You and me," she repeated.

"You are my responsibility and you will not fall. I will not let you. Do you understand?"

"Yes," Raya nodded.

"Good."

Tormund took a breath. He saw Mance walking towards them and knew their time would soon be over. Tormund let his thumb trace over Raya's cheek.

"When lives are in my hand I focus on what is most important to their survival," he looked around, "I do not ignore you. I'm always aware of you," he said simply, "Even when I'm not looking directly at you, I see you Raya," Tormund leaned down and Raya bounced up on the balls of her feet.

Their lips brushed against each other just a second longer than usual and the Raya was sure her entire being was set ablaze.

Tormund looked down at her- the Stark girl, ignoring Mance standing a little bit behind her. He put her stray hairs behind her ear and then leaned down again, closing her face between his hands and kissing her deeply this time, just one hard kiss that hopefully told her all of the things he could never… just in case one of them didn't make it up the wall.

When they pulled apart Raya simply started at him.

Tormund released Raya.

"I care about you," he assured her, "but my loyalty is with-"

"your people," she finished.

"And I will not put my feelings before their safety."

Raya nodded once and Mance closed in on them. Tormund picked up his bag and put it on his back.

"Let's climb!" he yelled out.

The free folk cheered.

X

Tormund walked down the line of all 20 free folk making sure they had everything that they needed before he stopped by her own again. His face had blanked again. It looked how it had earlier. She knew that he was focused. She didn't say anything when he stopped beside her and took in her pick ax.

"Sink your metal deep and make sure it's secure before you take your first step," he told her gruffly, "Don't look down," he took her in, "You will make it to the top," he hit her on the back with enough force to cause her to slightly stagger, "I'm going to make sure of it," he was talking to himself more than her.

Quite frankly, Raya was okay with that. Staring at the full height of the wall up close had left her breathless and she was extremely doubtful that she could respond.

 **A/N: Hopefully I will be updating more since I am taking my last final tomorrow and will not be doing much of anything this summer. Thank you for all of your patience and I appreciate every single person that reads, follows, favorites and/or reviews. Thank you to the lovely people who read a little and then decide that this fic isn't for them. I appreciate it all!**


	16. Chapter 16

_Life doesn't always go according to plan. –unknown_

Raya stabbed her pickax into the wall and then pulled on it before lifting one of her feet and making a move upward. They had begun their trek up the wall and a quarter of the way up it had started snowing, a soft little sprinkle that didn't necessarily bother Raya, but did bother her bones. They were getting stiff and that was the last thing she needed. Her leg had taken up stinging again and she was sure the snow was causing the handle of her pickaxes to be slippery. She was not confident.

She felt little solace in the fact that she was tied to the same rope as Tormund, climbing directly beneath him, Orell beneath her, Ygritte beneath him and Jon at the bottom. There were four rows of five people climbing that damned wall and Raya was sure they hadn't lost not one person yet. She wouldn't start the chain reaction.

She took a deep breath before stabbing her next pickax through the wall. She pulled on the handle and watched it break the ice away. She yanked it out and stabbed it again a little higher, in a more secure space. She made another move upward. She let her foot hit a few different nooks in the wall before finally choosing one and lifting herself up. She could feel the eyes on her; Tormund checking on her progress and Orell who was most likely really just looking up at how much of the wall they had left to cover. Raya bit her bottom lip and stabbed her pickax in to the wall. She had a rhythm now…. More or less. She had yet to look down and she had no desire to. She barely looked too far above her head.

She was climbing the wall the way that she had begun to view her life, a small distance ahead, never behind her and never at the finish line.

Stab through the ice. Step up. Stab through the ice. Step up. It was a constant cycle that seemed to last forever. Raya was sure she could do it without thinking about it now… not that she would ever try to see how true that was.

The wind blew harder than it had in Raya's entire journey, pushing her hood off her head and causing her to instantly stiffen and move her body closer against the wall in hopes of keeping her footing.

When the gust of wind halted Raya was sure her eyes had completely dried out and she wouldn't be able to get back in to her rhythm. She was sure that she could just stay where she was hugging the wall until she died from starvation or fell. The pause and movement of her body had changed her stance. She wasn't sure if she would be able to get her footing back together. She took a deep breath. She tried to blink her eyes a few times to clear up the blurry mess that they were. She rested her forehead on the wall and she took a few deep breaths and then she heard it. She heard the cracking of the ice.

Raya's head snapped up and she tuned to the side in time to see a long break between the ice traveling horizontally. She yanked out her pickaxes and stabbed them both in to the ice again, jamming them in as hard as she could. She pressed her body up against the wall and closed her eyes.

"Hold the wall!" Tormund yelled.

Shouting echoed throughout what used to be the silence of determination and Raya's eyes snapped open. Snow slid down the wall and she ducked her head down so that any of it that went her way would bounce off of her head and not get stuck in her eyes. She heard yelling- screams louder than the shouting that had occupied the winds beforehand. Raya glanced quickly both ways. The group to the left of them was fine. The group to the right…

Raya looked at them and continued to blink until her vision cleared… just in time to see the five of them get wiped off the side of the wall. Raya let her gaze follow them. She resisted the urge to throw up when she realized just how high in the air they really were.

"No one move!" Tormund yelled.

And Raya knew that, that was the best command he could have given, because she was frozen in place. Her lip quivered and her hands felt as if they would be stuck to her pickaxes for the rest of her life. She stood still, waiting for Tormund to tell them to move. He didn't.

And he had been right to. The second chunk of the wall to fall, did so faster and harder than the first one. Raya looked up and at Tormund as he stabbed a few hooks in to the wall and began to roll their rope on to it. He stabbed his pickaxes back in to the wall. Raya readjusted her hold on her pickaxes and then… she screamed.

She screamed when her foot slid off of the ledge and she hung in the balance, one of her feet still on the wall and both of her hands still on her pickaxes. Everything happened quickly. One second she was attempting to regain her stance and the next she could hear her brother and Ygritte scream and was being yanked down the wall by their conjoined weight. Raya grit her teeth together and she pushed as hard as she could. Tormund spun around, putting his back to the wall, as he held on to his pickax with one hand and held on to the rope that held the other four of them with the other, his teeth grit together. He attempted to wrap the damned rope around his hand and Raya thanked the Gods for his added help as she found herself close enough to the wall to push herself back up against it.

She looked down again and then she screamed. Jon and Ygritte were not on the wall. They were suspended from the rope tied around them, but no parts of them was attached to anything against the wall. She could feel them tugging on her and she held on to the pickaxes before her as tight as her blistering cold hands would allow her to. She could hear Tormund huffing above her.

"We need to cut them free!" Orell yelled.

"No!" Tormund command came out as a hiss, loud and menacing.

Raya's heart sped up. He would not. He couldn't. She looked down at Jon still hanging in the balance. She began praying. She said a quick prayer to the seven and then she looked down and she saw him. She saw Orell begin to cut away at the rope that held Ygritte and Jon to the rest of them. Jon was causing the rope to rock left to right with his body movement.

"Jon!" Raya screamed his name, a shrill sound that caused everything in her to realize that this was really happening.

Her voice caught in her throat and then tears began to fall down her face.

"Orell!" Tormund called the elder man's name.

"What are you doing?!" Raya shrieked.

Jon shifted again and Raya sobbed, her chest heaving against the wall. She couldn't find it in herself to be afraid of the height. Raya yanked on the rope around her in a blank attempt to get Orell's attention. She looked around for something- anything to help them. She cursed.

Jon swung against the wall and stabbed one of his pickaxes in to the wall. Orell cut the rest of the rope and down Ygritte fell.

Raya wasn't sure if she could hear Ygritte yelling over her own yelling. Her throat was dry and burning and tears were still falling down her face when she realized that Jon had her. Jon had been able to hold on to Ygritte and he had yanked her on to the ledge with him. Raya swallowed. She swallowed and then she looked down at them in time to see Ygritte begin to climb again.

"Jon!?" Raya called his name.

"I'm fine!" he called back, "Make it to the top, Raya!"

Jon yanked his pickax out of the wall and stabbed it higher to follow after Ygritte.

Raya let her head fall forward against the ice before her.

X

When she reached the top, Tormund grabbed her by her shoulders and lifted her on to the wall. He held her at arm's length and he looked at her. He looked at her and then he yanked her in to him. He held her against him and Raya wrapped her arms around his waist and she began to cry.

"Damn it, girl!" he growled against her hair.

"I know," Raya nodded, her tears like lava against her snow kissed skin.

Tormund took a deep breath and then pulled away from her, looking at her again at arm's length.

"You actually did it," he laughed.

"I actually did it," Raya repeated, a small smile creeping across her lips.

"Are you-"

"I'm fine," Raya nodded and sniffed.

Tormund nodded in response.

"Your leg?"

"Fine," Raya assured him.

Tormund put Raya's hair behind her ears on both sides.

"Good."

Raya looked around the wall. People from the other two lines were beginning to make their way on to the wall.

"Thank you for-"

Raya's voice paused when she saw him- Orell.

She saw red and Tormund's heavy hand landed on her shoulder.

"Later," he said simply.

And Raya looked up at him. Tormund and Orell looked at each other for a few seconds before Orell smirked and walked around the two of them, taking extra care to brush past Raya who stiffened at his touch.

"He will bleed for this," she said to no one in particular, "for attempting to kill my brother," she took a breath.

Now was neither the time or the place but Orell was going to get a very rude awakening when Raya Stark got her hands on him.

Tormund opened his mouth and then closed it when a rather large man closed in on him with a smile spread across his face.

"Torwynd!" he clapped the man on the back, "I thought you may have fallen."

"Climbing the wall is in my veins," Torwynd boomed, a voice just as big and loud as Tormund's.

Raya paused and she was sure her mouth fell open when the two of them looked at her. Tormund's son. That was one of his sons.

"Torwynd, this is Raya. Raya this is my boy."

"I'm hardly a boy," Torwynd added, giving Raya a quick nod.

"The other one?" Tormund looked out towards the never ending snow that seemed to stretch out before them.

"Toregg is on his way up," Torwynd said simply, crossing his arms over his chest, "We had no problems."

Tormund nodded once at that and Raya prepared herself to see Tormund's second son.

What she got next was better.

The second she saw Jon she rushed to him and threw her arms around him.

"I love you," she squeezed her arms tightly around his neck, "You are an idiot and a cunt and you are a horrible teller of advice, but Gods I love you, Jon!" Raya hugged him a little harder, "If you had died I do not know what I would have done," Raya took a deep breath, "You're okay?"

Raya released him and quickly looked him up and down.

"I'm okay," Jon nodded, hugging his sister back.

"I was so worried for you, Jon," Raya resisted the urge to start crying.

"I'm okay," he repeated.

"I am going to kill Orell," she sniffed.

Jon nodded against his sister.

"Me and you," he whispered in to her hair, "The free folk don't care what happen to us, Raya. We're all just bodies in their armies."

"Jon-"

Raya paused when she saw Ygritte's head peak over the edge of the wall. She released her brother and they both headed towards her to yank her on to the wall. Raya pulled her in for a hug.

"Ygritte-"

"I'm fine," Ygritte scoffed and freed herself of Raya's grasp, "Don't worry too much about me Raya Stark."

X

Tormund's other son, Toregg was even larger than his brother and father and Raya knew instantly why they had adopted the last name Giantsbane. They were giants alright. Toregg was larger than any man she had ever seen… excluding the actual giant she had come face to face with. He wasn't as loud as Torwynd and Tormund however, which was both confusing and a little offsetting for Raya.

She found herself seated with Tormund and his sons on one side of her and Jon and Ygritte on the other, Orell on the opposite side of the large fire the remaining 15 people had surrounded. Raya watched the flames flicker before her and she bit on her bottom lip until it bled. Maybe Jon was right. Maybe Mance and the free folk didn't care about them… but Ygritte cared about Jon. And Tormund cared about her… or at least she thought he did anyway.


	17. Chapter 17

Snow changed to grass in the course of their walking. The days all seemed to run together in Raya's head, but she kept going all the same. Tormund made sure that her leg was bandaged and the ointment changed and it seemed to be healing nicely. His sons had taken up to teasing her and she enjoyed it. It made her feel like she was actually a part of them. She and Tormund hadn't had any passionate talks, romantic exchanges or anything of the like in the time since they'd made it on to the wall, but in her head, things had shifted. She doubted things had actually changed between them, but Gods did it feel like it to her. They had taken to sitting in comfortable silences until she tired.

Orell was avoiding her, just as he should have been and Ygritte and Jon had taken to sharing a tent.

"How much farther?" Ygritte asked.

"About a week, I think," Jon sighed.

The two of them were walking further behind Raya, Tormund and his sons.

"You think?" Ygritte scoffed, "So, you don't know?"

"When we went to Castle Black we took the Kingsroad," Jon said dryly.

Ygritte scoffed.

"You and your roads," she shook her head, "Is that how your lot does their fighting? You march down the road banging drums and flying banners?"

"Most of the time, yes," Jon admitted.

"How do the men carrying banners fight?"

"I would assume not well," Raya called over her shoulder.

Tormund, his sons and Ygritte laughed.

"They don't fight," Jon interrupted, "and Raya knows that."

"It's a great honor to carry your house's sigil," Raya said in her best Sansa voice.

"And the drummers?" Ygritte asked, "Is that a great honor too?"

"Usually it's the young boys banging the drums," Jon sighed.

"So what good are they?" Ygritte questioned.

Raya turned her head to look at Tormund who had turned his head to look at her at the same time. They both chuckled softly. Raya loved when Ygritte asked questions. It made her feel less conscious about asking the Free Folk questions. It highlighted how different they were and Jon never tired of answering her questions, just as Tormund never tired of Raya's.

"They help the men march," Jon answered.

"How?"

"The rhythm."

"But you just pick up and put down your left foot and then pick up and put down your right foot. Why do they need help remembering that?" she scoffed and Tormund and his look alike both laughed, "When Mance gives the signal and we hit Castle Black we won't be banging on drums to let them know that we're coming."

"No," Jon said tightly, and Raya sighed because she knew he was offended, "You're just going to light the biggest fire the North has ever seen to let them know that we're coming."

"You know nothing, Jon Snow," Ygritte said briskly.

She walked a little faster and bumped shoulders with both Raya and Tormund as she hurried forward and away from the rest of them. Raya sighed. The two of them argued nearly every single day. Raya wasn't sure how the both of them put up with each other.

"She's right you know," a voice said quietly, "you don't.

"I know you cut me loose on the wall," Jon growled.

Raya's head jerked in their direction and Tormund's hand closed around her upper arm. She paused and Jon, Orell, Tormund and his sons followed.

"I cut her loose too," he said simply, "Do you see her sulking about it?" he didn't pause, "That's because she understands the way things are."

"And are you going to share it with me?" Jon moved in on Orell and Raya jerked her arm out of Tormund's grasp, "The deep wisdom you found in the head of a bird?"

"People work together when it suits them," Orell said calmly, "They're loyal when it suits them. They kill each other when it suits them," he took a step towards Jon, their chests nearly touching, "and they love only when it suits them," he hissed at Jon and then cast a look at Raya and Tormund and chuckled, "She and Tormund know that," he added, "And the two of you don't, which is why you two will never be able to hold on to them," Orell bumped Jon's shoulder and continued forward.

Raya stiffened and pushed Orell with both hands before he could bump shoulders with her.

"Do not touch me," she hissed, "or it may suit me to kill you."

He scoffed at that, and then continued forward.

Raya looked at Jon and took a deep breath before casting a look at Tormund and then spinning around and pushing forward. She hated that man. She hated him and everything that he was. There was nothing for her to tell Jon. He had to think about Ygritte on his own. She had her own issues. She walked on, leaving the men behind her.

She walked alone for a while, taking in the sights. They were nearing forests now. They'd left the snow behind them. She had been braiding her hair so long it laid in waves framing her face.

She had become irritated in however long she had walked alone, irritated with Orell and irritated with herself for allowing Orell to get beneath her skin. She would get beneath his skin in return... literally. She was going to skin that man.

She pushed her hair out of her face and then yelped, when a large hand grabbed her by the upper arm and spun her around. She paused and she looked up at Tormund. He raised an eyebrow and then he moved in to her. He was close enough for her to smell his scent, whatever that was. It was some strange array of grass and sunflowers, which was hilarious, because Raya couldn't recall the last time she'd seen or smelled sunflowers.

Tormund looked around at the free folk around them as everyone continued to move.

"You mad at me?" he asked gruffly.

"No," Raya said at once, "No," she repeated softer.

"Then what's your problem, girl?"

"Are you going to kill me when it suits you, Tormund Giantsbane?"

Tormund looked at Raya. He caught her gaze and he held it.

"What kind of question is that?"

"You heard the same speech I did," Raya crossed her arms over her chest.

"No," he scoffed, "No, I am not going to kill you," he grizzled.

Raya could visibly see him get tense. She regretted opening her mouth. Tormund took a calming breath.

"He isn't dumb. He knows Jon is a crow through and through just like the rest of us," Tormund craned his neck down so that he wouldn't have to talk very loudly, "He is loyal to the free folk only now because it suits him. He will kill some of us when it suits him and he very much is with Ygritte because it suits him as of this day."

"You believe that?"  
"I know that," Tormund said stiffly, "and so do you."

"Do you do that?" Raya looked up at Tormund, "Are your actions that fickle?"

"My actions," Tormund shrugged, "but my feelings are unwavering. That's what you really wanted to ask, right?"

Raya opened her mouth and then closed it. She looked around them. She looked at her feet and then at a free man that passed them, anywhere but at Tormund. He was right. He was always right.

"If I only did things that suit me, we wouldn't be having this conversation," Tormund grabbed Raya's chin and tilted her head back, "but we are and I'm going to take care of you," Tormund said softly, "not only when it suits me, but until it stops suiting you. You're the one with the alternative life to choose between."

"I am yours and you are mine," Raya stood up tall and Tormund raised an eyebrow.

Raya refused to back down. She didn't change her stance. She watched Tormund watch her… and then the pair of them laughed and he spun her around and yanked her in to him, putting his arm around her shoulders as they continued forward.

X

Ygritte took them in. They were like a pair of lovesick kids. She scoffed. Well, Raya was a lovesick kid, but Tormund, he very well was not. The man had three sons and a daughter for the sake of the Gods. They sat away from the others, just the two of them whispering and laughing.

They made her happy.

She'd never admit it, but they did.

Raya looked at Tormund like some sort of God when she thought no one was watching. He was larger than her and always ready to jump to save her. Ygritte could see it. She could see the way Tormund looked at Raya like he doted on her.

She knew that they flirted. She also knew that they hadn't acted on their feelings. Time didn't determine feelings. She wanted them to be together, but she knew that she was being selfish. She figured if she got Tormund and Raya together, Raya would stay. Jon would never betray Raya. He loved her. He loved her more than those dumb idiots at the wall.

She wasn't being selfish. Raya wanted Tormund and Tormund wanted Raya.

She was being a good friend to Raya. Yes, that was it. That was what girls did when they had friends, right? They got them with the boys they thought were cute.

Ygritte sat on the outskirts of the fire. She and Jon had spoken before he'd retreated to bed. They didn't argue. They bantered. They were fine. They were always fine.

The moment one of Tormund's sons called to him to tell some idiotic story that she was sure Tormund changed each time he told it, she climbed to her feet and made her way to Raya. She plopped down beside her.

"Stark," she said calmly.

"Ygritte," Raya echoed her name.

"Let's talk."

"About Jon?" Raya guessed.

"About Tormund."

Raya cast a look at the man as he walked around the fire, cursing and hooting about the Giant he'd killed.

"What about him?"  
"You want him," Ygritte said simply, "And he wants you, but you have to make the move."

"Excuse me?"

"You're not some lady up in your castle that touches the clouds. You're with the free folk where women claim what they want. You've never been touched and he has four children. Tormund is not going to make his feelings known to you. He won't want to corrupt you," Ygritte said the speech she'd practiced in her head several times, "He will not claim you until you claim him."

"Ygritte!" Raya squeaked her name, "I- He- We," Raya took a breath, "I can't just throw myself on to Tormund."

"You can," Ygritte nodded, "You should!" she added, "What if we all die at the wall? Or what if we don't all die but Tormund dies? Then you'll wish you had jumped his bones," Ygritte stood up, "Whatever you choose to do with the information, just remember he has four kids so he must be quite good at it," Ygritte hugged Raya quickly, "Goodnight, Stark," she walked around Raya's seated place and headed towards her tent.

Raya watched her leave and then looked back at Tormund where he stood, his loud, booming laugh erupting from his body.

Reality set in.

She could die. Tormund could die. Jon and Ygritte and everyone could just fucking die. They could drop dead in the next week. She needed to love her brother and stop shutting him out. She needed to tell Ygritte how she admired her, even if the other girl would laugh at her. She- she… Ygritte was right. She needed to tell Tormund something. She needed to blurt out how she felt. She didn't care if it was ladylike or not. He could die. She could die. And then he could possibly wonder how she felt because she didn't say. Or she would end up tormented for the remained of her life wondering if her first love, loved her back.

She was going to do it. She had decided. She was going to tell Tormund that she felt… something… for him. She was going to tell Tormund that he made her feel… things.

And then what happened, happened and to hell with her prospects.

She had always known that they could die.

But now, they could die any day. If they were really 6 days away from the wall…

Raya possibly had 6 days left.

She was going to… do it.


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: Warning, Warning, WARNING! Sexual Content WILL BE in THIS chapter. It will be at the very end! So when things start to get frisky you can just stop reading if that's offensive to you. I'm going to end the chapter after the lemon and anything significant going on will be referred to in THE NEXT CHAPTER.**

Raya Stark was terrified. She was 'thinking that Jon was about to fall off of the wall' terrified. She had decided a full four days prior that she was going to stop tip toeing around Tormund and do something. She hadn't. There were three days left, stretched out before her like the rest of her life, shortened to a few hours and she knew not what to do with them.

She was seated on the ground in the grass. They had stopped to rest. She was thankful. She was attempting to collect her thoughts. Ygritte and Toregg were seated on a log a little in front of her. She had settled herself off on her own, to think properly, beneath a tree. She had taken her shoes off and was wrapping her feet with some of the left over bandage from her leg. She sighed and tilted her head to the side, letting her black hair fall down her shoulder. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. The air was crisp. It was still cold, but warm in comparison to where she had been before. There wasn't snow covering the ground. Raya was enjoying it.

Her eyes flew open when she heard laughter. She looked up and over. Jon, Tormund and Torwynd were seated on the ground with another of the free folk. Tormund was talking and the other men were laughing. Raya wasn't aware of the small smile on her face until it fell at the sight of Toregg getting up and heading towards the other and Orell, who sat beside Ygritte as soon as the space cleared.

Raya looked back down at her foot and continued to wrap it.

"You think he loves you is that it?" Orell questioned, "What did he tell you? That he's going to make you a lady and live with you in some castle?"

Raya opened her mouth and then shut it. She tied her bandage around her foot and shoved it in to her boot. She turned to the other one, stretching her done leg out in front of her.

"No," Ygritte scoffed continuing to sharpen her arrows, "He didn't tell me anything," she sighed, "He barely talks."

"I've seen the two of you whispering in the night," Orell scratched his head, "giggling like two girls."

"What? Are you jealous?" Ygritte snapped.

"Of course I'm jealous."

Raya looked up in time to see Ygritte's head snap to the side to look at him.

"You should be with one of your own," he said quietly.

"And you're one of my own?" Ygritte looked him up and down, "I've never heard a kind word out of your mouth," she snapped.

Raya looked back down and continued to bandage her foot. She was almost done. She needed to finish and move. She didn't need to hear Orell speak. It would just upset her.

"You would if you were mine," Orell said softly, "I'd tell you that you're beautiful and fierce and wild," he took a breath and set a hand on Ygritte's knee and she paused and looked down at his hand, "I would be good to you."

Silence etched between them and Raya shoved her foot in to her boot. She made sure her bows were secure in her quiver and she quickly braided her hair over her shoulder before standing and throwing her bag on to her back.

Orell and Ygritte didn't even notice her movement.

"Do you love him?" Orell broke the silence first.

Raya paused. Ygritte stiffened and then looked towards Jon and then back at Orell. She nodded her head.

"Because he's pretty?" Orell's voice hitched, "Is that it? You like his pretty hair and his pretty eyes?"

Raya closed her hand around one of her arrows. She would stab him through the neck for Ygritte. He had already tried to kill Ygritte once for the way she felt about Jon. Raya would never let him do so again right in front of her.

"You think pretty will make you happy?!" he stood up then and he reached for Ygritte's arm who stood up quickly.

"Don't touch me!" she snapped.

"You won't love him so much when you find out what he really is," Orell leaned in to her.

Raya made a move towards them and Orell's head snapped up. He looked at her and she held his gaze. He shook his head, looked at Ygritte and then turned on his heels and stalked away. Ygritte sat back down and went back to sharpening her arrows and Raya made her way over and sat beside her. She looked at Ygritte work for a little, one of her hands visibly shaking.

"Ygritte-"

"Don't," Ygritte's voice came out hard and icy, "Leave it alone."

"Okay," Raya nodded once and then hopped up.

She wrapped one of her hands around her backpack strap and took a deep breath and then she spun around and headed towards the others.

X

Tormund Giantsbane took in Raya Stark from where they were crouched behind a rock. She had drawn an arrow and was freeing her bow. There was a deer a few yards away and he was slightly amused that the lady of a great house was out hunting her own potential meals.

"You're just going to scare it off," he whispered, a smirk on his face.

Raya turned to look at him and he was instantly glad that he'd made the comment. Her fury shone on her face. She hated behind underestimated.

"I'm not going to scare it," she hissed, "I'm going to kill it."

"You think so?" Tormund tucked the stray strands of her hair behind her ear.

Raya smiled softly at him and he chuckled. She turned forward, drew her arrow and took a breath, releasing with her exhale. Tormund watched the deer go down and he raised an eyebrow. Raya jumped to her feet and made her bow fit in to her quiver. He stood up beside her and she smiled, a large grin.

"Good luck carrying that thing on your own," she chuckled and then quickly floated out of his reach.

He shook his head and then shaded his eyes to take in the deer. Yup, shot straight in the head.

He laughed to himself.

X

Tormund was able to recruit two of the free folk to carry the stupid deer and they still made good time.

Raya noticed Jon and Ygritte sneak away near a windmill and she was happy that they'd done so.

They crossed far more land than Raya thought they would and then they set up camp. No one was interested in being social. Everything had set in. There were three days between now and them reaching the wall if Jon was correct. Time was starting to run out and there was a chance that things would go downhill. There was a chance that some of them were going to die. There was a chance that they would fail the elderly and the young and their people. There was a chance that Mance had united all of them, just for them to die in the end. No one wanted to sit around the campfire telling jokes.

Camp was set up with a few people sitting around a small fire, but not participating in conversation. Tormund and another man sat on one side of the fire, while Raya and Jon sat on the other, three other free folk sitting off to the side. Ygritte and most of the others, Toregg, Torwynd, and Orell included had already retreated to their tents.

Raya could tell that her brother was tense. She could tell that he had much on his mind and she knew better than to ask what it was. He would tell her when he was ready. She had her own internal battle.

It wasn't a battle. She corrected herself. She had been saying she was a free woman for so long. She had begun to shoot her own animals. She was standing up for herself and Jon and she was holding her own. She was keeping up with everyone else and she had climbed the damned wall. She had been faced with not only one but three white walkers. She was more than capable of talking to a man. It was Tormund for crying out loud.

X

Tormund felt like he was the only person out of the 15 that wasn't always upset and irritated and worried. He wasn't sure why everyone seemed on edge. They killed crows and each other all the time. There was nothing to be worried about, not for him anyway.

He sat in his clean, open tent, all of his belongings, beside his bedding, still packed away. He sharpened his sword as he sat, a sort of therapeutic way for him to think and a necessity all in one. They were moving closer to enemy territory. He had already starting scanning their surroundings practically nonstop. He would be on high alert from now on. He tried to always be that way. It was better to be overprepared than under prepared.

He had been the last person to retreat to their tent. He had put out the fire and run through camp, making sure there weren't any extra guests in the nearby area, just so that he could sleep better. He almost laughed at the thought. He rarely slept fully. All the same, the group of them had started spreading their tents out less… just in case… and it gave him a slight comfort.

He looked down at his blade and paused in his work when he heard something, a slight bustle, something that sounded like a light walk. He hopped to his feet effortlessly and then stood still, his head tilted to the opening of his tent. He heard nothing. He lifted his sword. He took a few measured steps forward and reached for the flap of his tent. Their hands met and Tormund grabbed them easily enough flinging them to the ground and pointing his sword at their neck.

"Damn it, girl!" he dropped his sword.

Raya Stark laid on her back, her hair flaming around her as she chuckled.

"I frightened you, aye?"

Tormund scoffed, but walked back to the entrance of his tent and stuck his head out, looking both ways anyway. He told himself it was for his piece of mind before he turned and really saw her. Raya had her hair still braided over one shoulder. She wasn't wearing the clothing of the free folk. She was wearing her brother's old things, a plain black top and plain bottom, a hole in the trousers from when she'd fallen from the mountain side. The clothing seemed to be lighter in weight and more appropriate for the temperature. She sat up and stretched her legs out before her, her bare feet slightly brown at the bottom from her trek through the camp.

He didn't like the way that she was breathing. She flipped her braid off of her shoulder and then took a deep breath.

"Talk to me?" she said it in a way that sounded like a question, the end of the sentence rising in volume and making her sound unsure.

"Sure," Tormund made his way over and plopped down in front of her.

They both criss-crossed their legs and he watched her take him in before she looked up at his actual face. He raised an eyebrow and she smiled softly.

"Tormund, I don't want you to die," she blurted, "and I know your people are brave. I know that, but 6 times," Raya scoffed and looked down at her knees, "6 times in the past thousand years the free folk have tried to attack the kingdoms and 6 times they've failed and have been slaughtered. We grow up learning that," she looked back up at him and he took in her blue eyes, the way the shone as if by tears, "We grow up learning where every battle was fought, who fought them and the heroes. It is etched in to my brain like the names of the seven and the rooms of Winterfell. It is taught to me like prayer and the history of the Targaryen's. Six times," Raya shook her head, "Six times," she repeated quietly and scoffed, "The seventh will be the same," Raya licked her lips, "Your men don't have the discipline," she was spewing words out now, "Your army isn't an army. They all hate each other and they don't have the training. They- they don't know how to fight together," Raya shook her head, "If we," she took a deep breath, "Tormund, if we attack the wall, we are going to die- all of us."

Tormund sat quietly and waited. He waited to make sure that she was done spewing out her thoughts like some unsettling meal that she just couldn't keep down. He watched her take few quick shaky breaths.

"We can attack the wall and die or wait this side of the wall for the white walkers to kill us. Either way we all die," Tormund scratched his beard, "We have a chance fighting the living," he shrugged, "I'd rather we die fighting than…" he let his words die between them, "Any chance is better than our chance of waiting for the long night," he reached out and set a hand on her knee, "We're better trained than ever before. Mance has seen to it and the motivation of our loved ones lives will make the lot of us work and fight harder than we ever have. The thought of being eradicated does that," Tormund smirked.

Raya shook her head at the fact that he could be smiling at a time like this. She nodded at his words.

"Okay."

"You said all of us?" he checked.

"All of us," Raya repeated.

"You included?"

"Tormund," she said, "I stand with the free folk."

He nodded at that and squeezed her knee.

"Don't overthink this," he warned her, "There are hundreds of free folk already doing that. Stay calm and keep a clear head."

Raya nodded at that. He watched her look around his room. She took a deep breath.

"Do you remember when I said that I was yours as you were mine?" Raya asked, her eyes fixed on the place where his hand met her knee.

"Daily," Tormund removed his hand from his knee and rubbed his beard, licking his lips.

"I meant it."

"You did, aye?"

"Yes," Raya hopped to her feet, "I am yours, utterly and completely," she yanked her top over her head, one quick fluid motion before she could lose her nerve.

She didn't meet his gaze. She would look at him and then start overthinking and that was no good, no good at all.

"Raya," he said her name slowly and it entered her ears and made her heart hammer against her chest, "You're-"

"I'm not a lady," she said firstly, "and I don't care about my prospects and I'm not a child and I don't need to think about what I am doing. I have thought about it for quite some time and this is what I would like to do with my last remaining days. It's what I would like to do with my body," she scoffed and crossed her arms over her chest, "give it to you… So," Raya gathered up her courage, as much of it as possible and then shimmed out of her trousers, "Do not send me away for what you think is my own wellbeing," she took a deep breath and finally looked at him, Tormund Giantsbane, still seated on the ground, one of his hands on each knee, "Only send me away if you don't want me. That is the only acceptable reason."

She swallowed. She tried to gage his reaction. Tormund looked up at her, his green eyes locked in on her and she was suddenly far less self conscious despite the fact that she was even more bare now.

"You know that I want you," was his response, his voice low, gruff, short.

"I am yours."

Tormund lifted a hand towards her and she could have sworn she was under water with the way her hearing suddenly stopped working. She took the few steps towards him and set her hand in his. He jumped to his feet in one fluid motion. He grabbed her face in both of his hands, his finger at the back of her head, his two thumbs just beneath her mouth. He held her face still, tilted back. He kept his eyes on hers. His eyebrows temporarily fiddled together.

"You won't die," he said gruffly, "Don't make rash decisions. You have time."

"I've thought about this," Raya repeated, "and I want to be yours, now."

Tormund looked at her, Raya Stark, standing before him. He nodded once and then he craned his neck down and his mouth was on hers.

He hated to even think about it, but she was partially right. There was a chance they would fail at the wall. There was a chance he would die every time he entered any sort of fight however and that had never stopped him before. The only time they had was the present. And she was old enough to make her own decisions. He had to admit that if she was someone else… anyone else, he wouldn't have questioned it. He had to admit that if she were someone else they wouldn't have found themselves in this position at all. She was… special to him. It was strange how that worked, how she could get under his skin so quickly, gradually but all at once, become what he wanted to be a permanent fixture in his life… but their future together was shaky and subject to fail, just like this war ahead of them. He knew that. But, he also knew that he had never backed away from a challenge before and here in this moment there were only the two of them. No Jon and Winterfell for her and no group of his people looking to him for advice and leadership. No one and nothing existed outside of his tent. No one outside of the two of them existed in this moment.

He let his hands leave her face and he wrapped them around her, holding her flush against him. She was a mess of nerves, jittery. She held on to the front of his clothing and she submitted so willingly when he pushed his tongue in to her mouth. There was no battle for dominance. There was no dancing together in their mouths. They were both too anxious, both too eager. Their tongues sloppily collided, making Tormund smile against Raya's mouth while she attempted to rid him of his shirt with her inexperienced fingers. It was him who broke the kiss to rid himself of his own clothing. He did so, with his eyes trained on her, her eyes focused on his movement. She watched his hands as he rid himself of his over clothing, laying it over his already prepared bedding, the more plushness between Raya and the ground, the better. She watched him lift his shirt over his head, from the neckline and she took in his bare chest. She'd known he was muscular enough with his clothing on, but she was looking at how well defined he was now. She took in the gold bands around his upper arm that she wasn't sure she'd ever noticed before. Her eyes traveled over his chest up to his face and she resisted the urge to blush when she realized he had been watching her drool over him.

He ushered her over to his bedding without ever touching her. There was no desire to subtle seduce her. There was no desire to coax her in to doing anything that she didn't want to do. He rid himself of his shoes, but kept his bottoms.

He watched her, the Stark, as she sat on his bedding and then laid backwards in to it, closing her eyes and taking breaths, to calm her quick breathing. He watched her release her own hair from its braid and he knew that her mind was racing. He looked down at her, taking in all that she was for what was the first time. He wanted to etch every line of her body in to his memory. He took in her feet, laid out and crossed at the ankle. He let his eyes travel up her legs. She seemed to have legs for days despite the height that she was. He took in the curve of her hips and the way they went back in to continue up her average waist. He took in her stomach and the swell of her breast as the both moved with each breath that she took. He looked at her hands, laid above her head as her fingers danced in her own hair, freeing it from the curly mess that it had become. He took in her mouth, the way it was slightly ajar and her eyes, the way they fluttered from the forced way she had them closed.

Tormund closed in on her and he knelt before her. He touched one of her feet and her eyes flew open at the contact. She uncrossed her legs at the ankle and Tormund's hand followed her foot up and over her stretch of skin, allowing his frame to follow his hand, until he was housed between her legs. She looked up at him, with those eyes, those dark ocean water, colored eyes that weren't aflame with resistance and independence like usual, but were instead lighter, partially from excitement and partially from that innocence that she still had about her, despite how much she attempted to be a warrior. Tormund took a breath, his hand traveling up and across her stomach. He let his finger tips trail up and over one of her breast, his thumb brushing over her nipple and then he let his hand travel up her neck and Raya had a sharp intake of air. He ran his thumb over her bottom lip and then he leaned forward and he kissed her again, covering her body with his, holding himself up to spare her from his full body weight above her. He let his travel back down the same path it had taken up and continued the slow hard kiss, before he let his hand rest on the inside of her thigh. He felt her hands, twin themselves in his hair. He let his thumb run over the folds of her womanhood and her chest jumped with the unexpected contact.

He lowed himself on to her, just a little bit of his extra weight and he let his hand rest between her legs. He broke their kiss long enough to kiss her cheek, her collarbone, the side of her head. He attached himself to her lower neck, planting quick, hungry pecks and light bites. He slid his middle finger between her folds and she gasped lightly, but didn't jolt. She was already wet and it made his head swim, the way one of her hands found its way down and on to his trousers, holding him flush against her. He dipped his middle finger inside of her just lightly to make her wetter and then stroking back up to her clitoris to stimulate her with her own wetness. He groaned against her skin. She responded so well.

Raya kissed Tormund's shoulder and he circled her pearl. He owed her an orgasm. Maybe two. She would get them in advance. She was untouched, a virgin. There was a chance she wouldn't receive one during the actual course of their sexual encounter.

He bit down on her neck and he sped up the way he circled her there, the home of nearly 8,000 nerves and she moaned lightly. He changed the rhythm slightly and he slowed down on the kissing of her exposed skin as she sped up on hers. He listened to her, her body and her breathing, the soft little pants that exited her mouth and the way he could feel her tongue on his shoulder, her nails in his lower back. He stopped moving his finger in circles and started to allow them travel up and down between her folds. He felt when she stiffened, just briefly and he held on to his willpower to not replace his fingers with his cock and rock himself against her and the wetness that was clinging to his fingers. He let his other fingers slide over her outer labia and he stroked his whole hand up and down against her, the veins in his arm twitching.

Raya's back arched, driving her clit harder in to his hand and she was done.

She shook slightly and Tormund kissed the side of her head and raised his head off of her shoulder. She let her hands fall from his waist and his hair and trailed his hand up through her wetness and she jolted with the slight aftershock of her first orgasm.

He kissed her lips, one quick peck and then he was moving before she could grasp on to him. He housed himself between her legs, leaning back on his own and Raya blinked her eyes a few times as if coming from a daze. Tormund placed his hands on the outside of Raya's legs and he opened her to him, her sex glistening before him. The air hit her wet skin and she shuddered lightly.

Tormund smirked down at her and then he lowered his head and he lapped up her wetness, up from her entrance to her clit and back down. He kissed her and he breathed her in. Raya. His Raya. Because after all, that was what she was. His. She was a free woman who belonged to no one, but she belonged to him, in a way.

He buried his face between her thighs. He could feel her contract, almost like she was trying to kiss him back. He moved his entire head. Up and down. Up and down. Up and down. And Raya above him, moaned lightly, her hands holding on to his head of hair. Hair. She loved his. She loved his facial hair. She loved the way it brushed against the inside of her thighs with each head motion that he made and she wasn't sure why she had waited this long to give herself over to him. He laid his hands on her lower stomach and allowed his thumb to rub slowly on her clit and he lowered his face to focus on the rest of her. Raya felt a spark of electricity shoot through her body when he started to move his head side to side and her legs instinctively closed. She felt him chuckle against her and then his hands came up and closed around her thighs, hooking them on his elbow and bringing his hand around to stroke at her again. He let the other hand rest on her bottom and he lifted her into him. He slurped at her, long, flat tongued strokes, until she mewed his name softly.

He took a break to look up and at her, one of her hands holding on to her own hair tightly, the other on his elbow. He licked his lips as he looked at her and he was amazed that he had found her, a Stark of all people, that tasted like a nectar perfected for him specifically. He shifted one hand and slipped one finger slowly inside of her. She jolted and he licked at her again, pointing his tongue to work at her just long enough to add a second finger. He moved his fingers in and out of her slowly, a nice contrast to how quickly he was flicking his tongue over her. The hand that was on his elbow, traveled up and closed on his hair roughly and it spurred him on. He started to move his fingers faster and he shifted one more. He allowed one hand to move in and out of her and used the other one to tap on her clit.

Raya shook. She shivered and her legs tried to close on his head again and then she let out a groan that surprised her and made Tormund look up at her and see bliss. He placed one more quick kiss to her and then to her lower stomach and then he wiped down his chin and beard with one of his hands as he crawled up her body. He kissed her collarbone, a sloppy, slobbery kiss.

"If you want me to stop, tell me to stop," he whispered and then he kissed her beneath her ear.

Raya hummed.

"Do you hear me, Raya?" he kissed beneath her ear again.

"Yes," she mumbled against his shoulder and gave one nod of her head.

Tormund reached between them and quickly flicked his finger over her sensitive clit before pushing his mouth against hers. Raya wrapped her arms around his waist now that she actually had something tangible to hold on to.

"Tormund," she whispered his name against his mouth.

He lifted his head a little and kissed her cheek. He held himself up on one arm and used the other to shimmy his bottoms down his waist.

"Right here," he assured her.

He released his trousers, and held her open with his fingers.

And then he pressed at her opening.

He knew his cock was already leaking at the head and Raya drew in a shaky breath. He shifted a lit and his cock rubbed up against her wetness again. Raya turned her head and took the opportunity to lick at the vein in her neck. She muttered and Tormund slid partially inside of her. It felt amazing. He rubbed her pearl and rocked up against her, just the head. His hand traveled back up and he grabbed one of her breast, massaging the skin there. He squeezed one of her nipples between his thumb and pointer finger and when she mewed he pushed himself halfway inside of her and then felt her nails dig in to his skin. He paused. He held himself above her and their gazes met.

"Are you okay?" he kissed her, below her eye, the closest part of her face that he could reach in his positon.

"Yes," she took a breath, "Just- just stop."

Tormund tensed. He lifted his head and he started to lift himself off of her.

Her legs closed around his back.

"Right now," she corrected, "Just stop right now. I need a moment," she craned her neck upward and kiss Tormund's chest, "Please."

"Whatever you want," Tormund nodded.

His eyes locked on hers and they simply existed without movement. Their breathing synchronized of its own accord and Raya breathed through her mouth. She searched him. His green eyes hooded and she licked her lips. Raya took a deep breath and she shifted a little, making Tormund pull his bottom lip between his teeth. His eyebrows fiddled together and he took a breath of his own.

"Okay," Raya nodded softly, twice, "You can move now," her nails rested on his skin, "just go slowly, please."

"Mhm," Tormund craned his neck down and Raya tilted her head back so that their mouths could meet.

He pushed himself in to her, nice and slowly. He could feel her spasm around him and stretch out, sucking him deeper in to her depths. Her hands slid up his body and closed around his broad shoulders. She gasped for air and panted against him. He withdrew out of her and then entered her again, just as slowly. He did it a few times, before no longer withdrawing fully anymore and instead rocking in and out of her.

Raya bit in to his shoulder and Tormund, grit his teeth together at the sensation. His free hand danced over her ribs and then he laid a little more on top of her, pulling her tight against him. She was hot, so hot wrapped around him. He was the luckiest man in all of the kingdoms. He had found Raya in a mess of people, a Stark on the wrong side of the wall, a noble woman in a wildling camp. He was meant to be with her, just the way that they were. They fit together so perfectly. Raya wrapped both of her arms around Tormund's neck, yanking her in to him, to kiss him, a hungry, passionate kiss. He was holding her immobile against him and she made a tiny rock in to her and she wiggled against him.

"You okay?" he asked against her lips, just to be sure.

She nodded. She couldn't speak.

"Are you sure?" he nuzzled her, his nose in to her neck and she hummed as she ran her fingers through his hair.

He kissed her again and this time his tongue thrust in to her mouth. Raya's tongue peaked out and played with Tormund's tongue, stroking it inside of hers until she felt confident enough to shove her tongue in to his mouth. When she got to that point Tormund sucked her tongue in and ate at her mouth.

He started to stroke in to her a little bit faster, working up to a nice, normal speed. He was nice and slow and tender. She was so wet but she clenched around him all the same and she let her hands fall from behind his back and hooked it around his legs as he gyrated his hips in a slow, relentless rhythm. He kissed Raya until he was sure she couldn't breath, let alone swallow. He slid in and out of her warmth. One of her hands remained on his buttox, while the other twined in to his hair and he had never been so glad that he didn't cut the mess. He was sure he could do this for hours, drift in and out of her seeping wet channel as she panted for him, her nipples, hard against his chest. He was sure she was dripping in to his bedding, her wetness clinging to the inside of her legs. He watched her avidly, switching the rhythm of his movements and adding a slight lift at the end of each stroke inside of her.

He held his face above her while he shifted. Raya was taking him with no problem now and he sped up a little more again and Raya breathed through her mouth. Being inside of Raya Stark was the best feeling he had ever experienced in all of his life. The way she took his cock and coaxed him on with her, nice, soft mewing was enough to make him come undone on its own. He shifted again and Raya's mouth fell open.

"Tormund," she said his name, quietly.

"I've got you baby," he stroked in to her the same way he had done before and she gasped.

That was it. That was it right there. Once he found it, he shifted his angle to hit Raya in that same precise spot every time, his hands in the bedding on either side of her hair. He stroked in to her long, measured strokes. He watched her avidly, sweat beginning to collect on her collarbone. Her legs fell from where they were hooked on his and she opened them up to him. Her hands traveled up and closed around his face. Her thumb ran along his bottom lip and down his beard and her eyes fluttered open and they locked gazes as Tormund continued to work over her in that one desired spot. He worshipped her as he held her gaze, the way she was walking perfection. He sped up a little more and the sound of their flesh slapping against each other immediately became his favorite sound.

He could feel her clenching around him.

"You're so close," he said quietly and Raya's eyes glinted as he held her gaze.

She focused on him, the feeling of him sliding in and out of her, filling her up so completely and so fully. She was so happy, so happy, that Tormund was above her, doing all of the work. She was sure that she wouldn't be able to move if she needed to. The pressure inside of her was building so quickly and she never wanted him to stop. She never wanted him to pull out of her. He rotated his hips against her and she couldn't hold Tormund's gaze anymore. She moaned and her head fell backwards. Tormund turned his head slightly to the side and sucked Raya's fingers, just two of them, from where her hands rested on his face, in to his mouth. And he sucked on them, never slowing his thrusts.

Tormund thrust up and then kept thrusting, faster than he had before. Raya's breathing sped up.

"Tormund," she gasped his name.

He slid his tongue over her fingers and Raya let them slide out of his mouth and down his chin.

"Let go," he pushed out, his breathing hard and ragged.

That voice. The way he spoke, his voice deep and gravely made her clench. She trusted him. She knew that he knew what she was doing. She lifted her legs and her legs wrapped around his waist, her heels digging in to his legs, forcing him deeper inside of her.

Tormund shuddered and gasped. His breathing came out quickly. Sweat beaded on his forehead and Raya swore that she could feel a warm gush inside of her. Tormund groaned and sank his face down in to her neck. She could feel him kissing her there, little open mouth kisses on her sweat soaked neck. The change of angle had pushed him over the edge and he thrust hard in to her, any kind of pattern lost. He bit down on his bottom lip and he shuddered and Raya planted kisses all along his shoulder blade and beneath his ear, her arms wrapped around his neck. He continued to stab himself in to her and Raya began to chant his name in to his ear.

Tormund pulled himself off of Raya and wiped sweat from his face with one hand and used the other one to circle her clit while he remained housed inside of her. She was close, so close, and he just needed to get her there. He leaned forward once more and he took one of her nipples in to his mouth. Raya cradled his head and he sucked on her erect nipple as toyed with her labia. He let his tongue trace a circle around her nipple and then he bit down on it, just lightly and he felt her fall apart beneath him. She grunted and shivered beneath him and Tormund groaned before collapsing on top of her.

She was buried beneath his chest, but didn't particularly care. She let her hands trace up his lower back, through the perspiration that rested there.

"Mmm," he mumbled and shifted slightly, sliding down Raya's body.

He slid his cock out of her and Raya made a noise as her body trembled slightly. He let his head rest on her chest, just beneath her breast and Raya found both of her hands in his hair. She hugged him to her and one of his hands danced along the outside of her thigh while the other gripped one of her hands in his hair and brought it down in to his bed.

He held her hand and listened to her breathing as it began to balance.

"Raya," he said her name softly and his breath felt amazing against her skin.

"Hm?"

"I will never let anything happen to you," he squeezed her hand, "I will take care of you."

"Mmm," she hummed, her eyes closed.

"I am yours and you are mine," he whispered.

"I am yours and you are mine," Raya repeated.

Tormund reached for furs to cover the pair of them and then lifted his head just enough to look up at her. He smiled at the sight, her hair flying around her face, her cheeks flushed and her chest moving up and down with her breathing. She was asleep.

He wrapped his arms around her upper waist and cuddled in to all that Raya Stark was.


	19. Chapter 19

_I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman. -Anais Nin_

 _ **A/N: To respond to a question that I received as a review: Yes, there will most likely be another small lemon or two throughout the course of this fic. They definitely will not be as long or as detailed as the one in the last chapter, but I wanted to try to make sure I could capture at least some of Raya and Tormund's emotions and their connection and chemistry and passion and I hope that I did that.**_

Raya woke up still tired, allowing her eyes to remain closed for just a few moments longer before she sat up. She looked around the tent that did not belong to her. It was extremely clean. She ran a hand through her unruly hair. Of course it was. They moved every day. She yawned and she stretched her arms above her head. She sniffed and rubbed her eyes. She noticed her clothes folded beside her sleeping space.

Right.

She was naked.

She was naked and in Tormund's tent… with no Tormund.

Raya scrambled to get up and quickly threw on her clothing from the night before. If Tormund was gone that meant that people were up and moving about. That meant that Jon could be up and moving about. Raya yanked on her trousers and then attempted to shove her feet in to her shoes as she pulled her top on. He was going to go in to a fit if he went to wake her and she was nowhere to be found. Raya braided her hair quickly, a mess of a braid that she was sure had more hair flying out of it than ever before. She half ran out of Tormund's tent and made her way to her own.

It was empty just as it should have been.

Raya collected an array of clothing and changed. She felt like she was late. She packed up her tent entirely, despite having seen a few other tents still standing in the area and then she headed to the center of their makeshift circle. She collected food and sat in a nice clear space to shove food in to her mouth. She made quiet polite conversation with the people that acknowledged her as they walked around and she mechanical fed herself.

She was still slightly tired. She was sure her legs were sore. Her head was reeling, but her heart was content. She had awoken twice throughout the night and each time she found herself suffocated in Tormund Giantsbane. She enjoyed being suffocated by him, being surrounded in his existance as he laid vulnerable beside her. She didn't see Tormund vulnerable, his guard down, often.

She had opened her eyes to one of his arms wrapped around her, holding her so close against the front of him that she was sure their breathing had somehow synchronized. He held her closely, his face slightly in her hair and she relished in the feel of his breath against the top of her head as he enclosed her in all that he was, warmth and serenity and some weird peace that she had never accomplished in all her years.

She had awoken once with him laid out on his back, one of his arms lazily thrown out to the side of his person, the other laid above them, his elbow beside her head and she had slid in to his space and laid her head on to his chest. She had found solace in his presence and all she could smell was him, a scent that reminded her of freedom, of greenery and trees and wind that did not chap her lips and turn her cheeks red, but instead gave her needed air in the heat. She had listened to his heartbeat, a steady drum like those of war, a sound that easily had become her favorite sound. She had found herself draped across him, her hands traveling over him. She had found herself grateful for the way she could appreciate him while he didn't move, laid out for her to do as she pleased. She had run her hand across his arm, and those golden bands that she had never noticed because they were all always dressed in so much clothing. She had taken in his broad chest and she had sighed in contentment when the hand that laid above them fell from its past position to enclose her against his skin and run its way down her arm as if even in his sleep he could feel her and know what she needed.

And now they were awake.

Now, things were different.

Or… maybe they weren't?

Raya wasn't sure about that. There had been nothing between the two of them the night before, no clothing, no different backgrounds, no witty banter, no confusion or self doubt or upcoming decisions. They had all been lost in the darkness of night, discarded like their clothing with nothing but their sounds and whispered sweet nothing and feelings. Gods, there were quite a lot of feelings. She had been smitten with Tormund before but things had shifted yet again. She had felt something like a spark, something like lightening traveling through her entire body at once. She had been electrified and she was merely talking about the overwhelming emotional presence between the two of them. She couldn't even add the physical aspect to the equation. She shook her head clear as she blushed just by thinking about it.

She ate quickly and then sat and stretched. She fixed the way she had jammed her feet in to her shoes as the others began to clear away their things for the journey to begin. She stood and she yawned and her head snapped to the side when she heard laughter and her heart fell in to the bottom of her boots when she saw him, Tormund, with Jon and two other people following him in tow. She looked back at the others and she stretched yet again, anything to not awkwardly stare at the people entering the circle. She tucked her stray strands of hair behind her ears and nearly jumped out of her skin when a hand tapped on her shoulder.

She spun around and smiled at Jon.

"Hey," he said softly, "Are you okay?"

"Yes," Raya nodded slowly, "Why would I not be okay?"

Jon ignored her question.

"We should be to the wall soon," he looked at her for a while before looking out and over at Ygritte who was talking to someone and rearranging her arrows.

"And you've come up with a plan?"

"No," Jon admitted, "but I'm going to have to leave soon if I want to reach the wall ahead of them."

Raya opened her mouth and then closed it again.

"Jon, they just want to save their people."

"They're going to kill my brothers, Raya," he looked at her,

"You only have three brothers, Jon," she hissed through her teeth.

"They're," Jon took a deep breath, "They're innocent people. They aren't knights. They're burglars and untrained men."

"The women and children on this side of the wall are innocent people too and the Night Walkers are still going to kill them. They aren't after land. They're after safety. If they could get on the other side of the wall..."

"The Night's Watch would never allow that."

"Then there's going to be a battle."

"Raya, they're going to lose," Jon set a hand on her shoulder, "You have to know that."

"I-" Raya shook his hand off of her shoulder, "They have to try."

Jon opened his mouth and then shut it and cleared his throat.

Raya took a step away from her brother and he lifted his chin to signify someone was behind her before giving her shoulder a pat and heading towards Ygritte and the others.

Raya spun around and paused. She looked up at Tormund Giantsbane and stood still as he took her in. He reached a hand down and he pulled her braid free.

"You have a bruise on your neck," he said in explanation.

And Raya was sure she instantly was blushing.

"You aren't serious."

"Oh, I'm serious," Tormund looked at her, his eyes glinting, a half smile on his face.

Raya couldn't tell if he was serious or not and she instinctively reached up to touch her neck.

"You bruised me?!" her voice hitched.

"Does it hurt?" he ignored the question.

"No," Raya poked at her neck.

She didn't feel anything. She was sure that he was messing with her. He had to be. She had just spoken to Jon and he hadn't said anything. She doubted he would simply ignore such a thing. She also took in to account the fact that things were weighing heavy on his thoughts. She combed her fingers through her hair.

"Are you hurt?" his smile had vanished and he leaned down and towards her and Raya took a quick shallow breath.

"No," she said quietly and shook her head to match, "I feel fine," she laughed, "but thank you."

He nodded at that, one soft nod accompanied by a sigh.

"Good."

Tormund turned and took in the people around them. Nearly everyone had packed up and they were quickly preparing to start their trek. He looked back down and at Raya Stark and then he grabbed her by her shoulders and yanked her in to him.

It had taken quite a lot of self control for him to have not walked directly to her the moment he'd seen her in the small clearing, her hair a mess, but her eyes lively. She looked calm. She looked deep in to thought. She looked like walking happiness and like… She looked like someone he cared about. She looked like someone he would die protecting.

And he hugged her, her arms around his mid-back and as if one they breathed each other in at the same time and then broke apart, a smile on Raya face, a smirk on Tormund's. And Raya noticed. She noticed the absence of his rather large boastful laugh and she felt her worries melt away like the last snow of Winter before festival season.

"What happens now?"

It was a blurted question that Raya instantly regretted and that paused Tormund and his thoughts right where they were. They stood in silence, looking at each other and they watched each other, the traveling eyes on Raya and the hand twitching of Tormund.

X

Jon may have been clueless, but Ygritte was not. Jon had sent her off to check on his sister at sunrise and she had done so. She hadn't found a Raya Stark to speak of. She'd known instantly where the girl was. She was proud.

She had lied.

She had told Jon that his sister felt ill and needed more sleep. She had told him to not disturb her and Jon had believed her. She hadn't given him any reason not to.

She was sure that she knew what she thought she knew, but when she saw Tormund leave his tent, yanking on his top, scratches on his upper back and upper arms she was positive. She'd closed in on him and smiled politely and asked after Raya who he'd said was sleeping and not to be disturbed.

Ygritte was amazed. The little Stark girl had slayed the Giant slayer. It was hilarious really. He seemed happier, less tense about the upcoming battle. He had told her to keep her comments to herself not that he cared who she told. He was Tormund Giantsbane and no one would tell him what he could or couldn't do anyway. Most of the free folk were too scared of him to try. He had almost been the leader of the free folk, a title he had lost to Mance. He'd kept the respect of the people however and Ygritte had fallen in to that category. She respected him as a leader. She understood that he was smitten with Raya, yes, but Ygritte didn't believe he would ever betray their people.

Raya, however, had not just fallen in love Tormund. She had found a love for the lot of them, for their people and for their rules. Maybe Jon was unsure of their motives, but Raya was with them. Maybe she thought that she was confused, but Ygritte could see it. She could see the freedom in her and she was wearing that- and love- well. Ygritte took a deep breath. She didn't talk much, but she wasn't stupid. She knew that Raya would prove beneficial, especially on this side of the wall. She showed them all a different side of Tormund, even if neither of them realized it.

That was what it was, compassion. She wasn't sure she had ever seen Tormund so serious before. The man was always joking and telling stupid stories, but he was serious when around Raya.

So, Ygritte stood, not particularly listening to the people beside her. She stood with her eyes on the couple. Raya was looking at Tormund as if he was the best knight in all the kingdoms and Tormund Giantsbane, the man that had climbed the wall half a hundred times, the man that had trained most of them to fight, the man that was prepared to step up if anything happened to Mance, the man that prided himself on his ability to end his enemies with one swing of his ax stood before Raya, his hand twitching like some little maiden.

They were in love. And everyone, besides them and Jon Snow seemed to see it.

The people that refused to see it were the people that needed to see it the most.

"Ygritte?" Jon said her name and she was shaken from her thoughts.

"What Jon Snow?" she turned her gaze to him, "Do you need me to help you put on your boots too?" she teased.

Jon scoffed.

X

They looked at each other and Tormund watched Raya's confusion, her worry, her uncertainty, her bashfulness travel over her facial features and he wanted to tell her that they were one. He wanted to tell her that he would take care of her until his dying breath. He wanted to tell her that she was perfect and that the uncertainty she felt was breaking his heart because he was certain that he wanted to be in her life. He didn't want her to question whatever it was that she'd felt. He didn't want her to be uncertain of the permanent position she could have in his life… if she wanted it that was.

But, he needed to be sure that he was there for his people. They came first. They came before his own feelings. They were lives weighted on his back like a kingdom of his own. He needed to save them before he could do anything else and he refused to lie to Raya. He refused to tell her that they would be together forever. He refused to tell her that things would be fine and that they would end up together like the world was perfect. There was a chance that he would have to kill Jon. He couldn't very well tell the girl standing before him that he wanted to protect her from every wrong in the world and then massacre her kin. So, he said nothing.

They looked at each other and Raya watched Tormund's mind move faster than she thought she'd ever seen. She watched his mouth partially open as if he was to say something. She watched his thoughts travel his facial features as if they were tapestries over his skin. She waved him feel adoration towards her and she watched it vanish. She watched it be replaced by worry and then acceptance and she watched him smile at her, a smile that didn't touch his eyes.

She wanted to tell him that she felt things for him. She wanted to tell him that she hoped he felt it too. But, she couldn't. She knew better than to worry him before something like a battle. He had enough to think about and now wasn't the time for her to tell him such things especially when her brother betrayed them all and everyone lost their trust in her. She regretted even asking the question. So, she said nothing.

The two of them looked at each other and merely breathed. And then, Tormund took the initiative. He grabbed Raya's chin in one of his hands and he leaned down and planted a kiss to her lips, a gesture that he hoped told her everything that he couldn't, in good conscious, tell her.

And then he stood up and he told her the one thing that he actually could tell her, the one undeniable truth that wouldn't change no matter what the next few days held.

"If I die, I die," he said simply, his hand on her cheek, "The future holds many things unknown to man, but I know that beside you I have lived," he let his thumb fall over Raya's bottom lip.

And Raya smiled softly and spoke her own undeniable truth, one that they were both very sure about.

"I am yours and you are mine," she said it quietly a whisper.

Tormund nodded and smiled at that.

"I am yours and you are mine," he repeated.

He tucked her hair behind one of her ears and he closed his eyes and took a deep breath and then when he opened them he turned away from her and towards them- the free folk.

"We're moving!" he announced, and as the free folk gathered their bags and hopped to their feet, Tormund reached back for Raya.

He took her hand and he walked.

He held her hand, the warmth a constant reminder of the way she'd lit his life aflame.

He held her hand and he started through the trees with the others on their heels.

He held her hand and Tormund Giantsbane led the group he'd assembled forward.


	20. Chapter 20

Raya took a deep breath and kept her eyes straight forward, ignoring the way she knew both Tormund and Ygritte were looking at her. They'd come across a house. They were all crouched in hiding, the entire 15 of them and Raya's heart was hammering in her chest. She was smashed between Tormund and Orell, Jon on the other side of Orell and Ygritte on the other side of Tormund. The five of them had gravitated together, Jon gravitating to Raya and she to Tormund as Ygritte to Jon. And Orell, the old fart, took any opportunity to mess with the four of them. Raya crouched again and turned her head to the side and watched Orell's being crash back in to his body.

"One old man," he said simply, "and eight good horses."

"What's one old man doing with eight horses?" Tormund peaked over their hiding place towards the house.

"He breeds them for the watch," Jon volunteered.

"And how does he keep folks from stealing them?" Ygritte asked.

"The watch protects him."

"Not today they don't," Orell pushed himself up on his knees and looked around at them, "He's selling horses. He has some gold in there."

"And proper steel," Tormund added.

"Let's carve him up," Orell clapped his hands together.

Raya's head snapped to look at Jon.

"We just take the horses and go," he said instantly, "The old man is no threat."

Tormund, Ygritte and Orell all turned to look at him. Raya peaked over the stones that kept them hidden again.

"I keep telling you," Orell looked at Tormund.

"Telling him what?" Raya snapped.

"He's an old man," Ygritte put a hand on Jon's shoulder, "A spear through the heart is a better way to die than coughing up your last with no one but your horses to hear you."

"The watch might send a few men for a horse thief," Jon ignored Ygritte and kept his eyes on Tormund, "but they'll send a lot more to hunt down murderers."

"I hope so," Tormund leaned in to Jon and Raya instantly felt the tension around them thicken, "Killing crows in the castle is tough. Killing them out here in the open," he smirked, "That's what we do," he turned away from Jon, "Spread out," he addressed the other free folk, "Surround the hut and move in."

Low murmurs began to take over the limited area and Raya cast a look at Jon before hopping to her feet with everyone else. They were in motion already, hopping out from behind their hiding places and moving over the grass faster and more silently than she'd thought was humanly possible. She didn't look at Tormund or Orell or anyone else for that matter. She licked her lips and then she jumped over the small stone wall and she followed the rest of their party. She ran. She ran as fast and as hard as she could, attempting to stay, at least, in the middle of the herd. If she got their quickly and defused the situation it would be all the better for Jon. She saw Tormund pass her quickly and had to admit she was slightly amazed.

She heard what sounded like metal being hit against something and she prayed that Jon wasn't being an idiot. She pushed herself harder. The horses began neighing after the sound of the metal echoed through the silence. Raya's lungs were beginning to burn. She saw Ygritte pass her. She tried to keep breathing through her nose and not her mouth. She pushed herself harder, her legs burning.

She saw him. Raya saw the old man exiting his house and she saw him run for a horse. She cursed and then skid to a stop before she could run directly in to Ygritte who drew her bow and arrow quickly and took aim.

"Ygritte!"

Raya and Ygritte both turned around to look at Jon and he ran between the two of them. Ygritte turned back to where her arrow had missed and she cursed under her breath and cast Raya a look before beginning to run again.

Raya followed closely behind, and when they reached the house Tormund was already shooving the old man in to a sitting position beside the house.

"Take food," he ordered them, "and steel, anything we may need but won't slow us down too much."

He whirled around and took in Ygritte.

"What was that?" he gestured to the old man, "I've never seen you miss in all my time knowing you."

Ygritte took a deep breath and averted her eyes. Tormund opened his mouth and then closed it and turned away from her. He headed towards the front door of the house, where wildlings were already filing in and out.

"He's getting tense," Raya observed aloud.

"Well, he could die any day now," Ygritte said, her eyes still on the door way, "Or even worse, this entire thing can fail, we can all die and he can live and blame himself for the rest of his days," she scoffed and headed towards her people.

Raya nodded her head once. Of course he was feeling the pressure. She took a deep breath. He had to know that people would die, that there was no way to attack the wall and simply have every single person live. He had to know that. No, he did know that. Raya knew that he understood that. That was why he was stressed. The very people that stood beside him could die on his call. A variety of them would die. She couldn't think about that kind of power… that kind of burden. She was partially happy that he'd lost to Mance for the right to be leader of the free folk. She took a deep breath and tilted her head back.

The heavens opened and rain began to pour from the clouds, the sun vanishing in a matter of minutes.

Raya snapped herself awake from her thoughts and began helping people shove things in to varying bags.

They finished quickly and then gathered back together. They heard thunder and then… something… else. Raya looked around.

"I heard a scream," Orell said from his place in the gathering.

"Thunder," Tormund said from where he was crouched packing the rest of his bag.

"I know the difference between shouting and thunder," Orell looked up at a stone tower near the house.

Raya collected her soaking wet hair in to her hands and quickly braided her hair to keep it off of her face. She wiped her face with both of her hands.

"Maybe it's a ghost," Tormund shot back and then stood up and threw his bag on to his back, "Let's deal with the old man and then we move quickly so be prepared."

The free folks began to shuffle around and Tormund closed in on the older man. Jon followed instantly and Raya and Ygritte looked at each other before following after him. The old man produced a dagger and started to wave it around and Tormund ran a hand through his hair before crouching in to the dirt.

"That won't help you, grandpa," he held out his hand towards the older man who hesitantly handed the blade to him, "Where were you riding?" he threw the blade across the ground.

"Doesn't matter much now does it?" the old man looked around at the different faces.

"No," Tormund agreed, "It doesn't matter now."

"Cut his throat or he'll tell the crows we're here," Orell closed in on them.

Tormund grunted and stood up. He freed his blade from its sheath and shrugged.

"You understand," he said instead of asked the older man.

"Least let me stand and die with some dignity," the old man looked up at him.

Tormund nodded once and the man staggered to his feet. He looked around the circle of people again. Tormund wielded his sword and bent his arm as if stretching the muscles within it. He prepared for his swing and Raya took a breath.

"Make the crow kill him," Orell inserted.

Raya shot him a look. Ygritte cast a look at Jon. Tormund glanced at Raya and then at Jon.

"Why don't you kill him then," Raya broke the silence.

"You're one of us now," Orell closed in on Jon, "prove it."

Jon took a deep breath and he looked at Raya. He cast a look at Tormund. He cast a look at Ygritte. He and the old man locked eyes and Tormund dropped his sword back in to its sheath. Jon pulled his free. He bit his bottom lip and he took a deep breath.

"She looks sharp," the old man said, his frightened brain scattered.

Jon nodded his head slowly, twice, as if in a daze.

Raya grit her teeth. Jon had killed people before… she thought. But, she also knew that he justified those killings with nonsense about what was right and what was wrong and she knew that this would make him feel like a murderer. She hoped he could look at this as something that was necessary. Raya knew that she could play Jon like the harp if she needed to. She knew that she could and very well would tell him that a brother of the Night's Watch had died for him to get to this moment. He didn't need to mess this up or that death was in vain.

Raya put her hand on her bow and freed it from her shoulder. She saw Jon's hand shake, just slightly and she drew an arrow.

The man started to pray, quickly and quietly and Raya felt bad for Jon. The man's face contorted as if he were crying.

"Do it," Ygritte said from her place in the circle.

Raya knocked her arrow, leaving it pointed at the ground. She took a quick shallow breath of her own. Jon looked at Ygritte.

"Do it," she repeated.

"Told you," Orell looked at Tormund, "he's still one of them."

"Go on, boy," Tormund's hand went back to rest on the handle of his sword.

Raya's heart sped up. Jon took a shaky breath.

"Jon," Ygritte said, a warning tone to her voice.

"Go on!" Tormund's voice thundered and Raya shot him a look that he either didn't notice or refused to acknowledge.

Jon raised his sword and Raya watched his doubt flash across his face. He looked like he would be sick.

"Gods forgive me," Raya said quietly and then she let two arrows fly, lodging themselves in the man's throat and chest.

Things happened quickly. Jon turned quickly towards her. Orell yanked his sword free and Tormund did the same. Ygritte grabbed her bow. Raya knocked a new arrow in to hers.

"He's a crow!" Orell yelled, "He'll always be a crow, and here's his crow wife guarding him," he spit at Ygritte's feet, "He'll stab us in the back the first chance he gets."

Tormund took a deep breath. He looked at Jon and Ygritte. He looked at Raya and then he looked at Orell and the line of free folk that had begun to gather.

"Kill him," Tormund gave the order.

Raya's head snapped towards him and she opened her mouth and then closed it and took aim. She didn't know what to take aim at. She had begun to know these people. They had shared food and stories with her. They had families. They had welcomed her in with open arms. Jon pushed Ygritte down and Orell ran at him. The sound of metal hitting metal woke Raya up from her trance. She aimed at Orell, an easy kill.

And then she startled when Tormund ran past her, yanking her bow out of her hand as he closed in on a blustering Ygritte, who was attempting to crawl to her own bow. He towered over her and yanked her to her feet and then up against him, his large arm over her neck. Raya looked around for something- anything to help Jon. She knew her chances of getting her bow out of Tormund's hand was extremely slim. She watched Jon cut down a man who had attempted to intervene and then return to fighting Orell.

She couldn't even think properly with the sound of sword hitting sword, the constant neighing of the horses and of Ygritte yelling no repeatedly.

"No! No! No!"

"He's one of them!" Tormund yelled at her and he shook her the little bit that he could with the way he was holding her.

"No!"

"Do you hear me?!" Tormund screamed.

Raya caught sight of Ygritte discarded bow and made a dash for it. She saw Ygritte bite Tormund's hand out of the corner of her eye. She saw Tormund grab Ygritte by her hood and fling her to the ground. He detained her with his weight, slamming his knee in to her stomach and holding her in the mud.

"I'm not going to let you die for one of them!" he yelled.

Ygritte began crying as she thrashed in the dirt. Raya scooped up Ygritte's bow. It was weighted different than hers. She nocked an arrow quickly and then paused when Jon impaled Orell with his sword.

"You were right the whole time," he hissed.

Raya looked around. She counted 5 of the free folk dead, including Orell. His eyes rolled in to the back of his head before he collapsed and then- his bird flew down and directly at Jon, who was easily taken off guard. Jon collapsed and the bird began pecking at him ferociously. Raya shot the bird easily enough and Jon threw it away from him as his sister ran to him. She grabbed his hands and yanked him up. She looked him over.

"Jon-" she reached for the cuts on his face and he swatted her hand away.

He grabbed her hand and pulled her in to him before lifting her up and throwing her over his shoulder easily, her feet sliding in the mud. She was light enough. He quickly covered the small space between them and the horses and threw her up and on to a horse, her stomach flat against the horse's back. He cut the rope and climbed on.

"Hyah!"he yelled and they were in motion.

Raya screamed. Everything had all happened so quickly. She felt sick. Her head was spinning. She didn't understand how everything had gone so wrong so quickly.

"I didn't have time to argue with you!" Jon yelled over the constant patter of the horse's feet hitting ground, "And there would have been an argument!" he slowed the horse down slightly so that Raya could readjust her position, "and I was not leaving you there with the wildlings!"

Jon had killed some of them- quite a few actually. He had killed the man that had helped Tormund's son carry her kill. He had killed the man who'd showed her how to properly tie her own arrows. He had killed them with no regards to all of the things that they had done for them- for her. Raya felt her stomach heaving, but she didn't throw up.

She cried.

X

Tormund watched the horse begin to disappear from view. He turned his head to the side and saw Ygritte watching as well. The girl turned away and she closed in on a horse and mounted it. Tormund cursed, but followed suit. He needed to end this thing. If Jon got to Castle Black the entire Night's Watch would know that they were on the way. If Jon got to Castle Black, Raya Stark would be returned to her side of the wall. He shook his head as he started after Ygritte. He tried to strike that second reason from his thoughts.

He and Ygritte followed Jon for a while- much longer than Tormund thought they would need to, but when they caught sight of him, Tormund personally couldn't have been happier. Jon was on the ground, not atop his horse. He was washing his scratches, Raya seated on the back of the horse, gazing off in the distance. The rain had stopped and her wet braid was clinging to the back of her clothing. He could see the rather large red mark in her neck from the way her head was turned, the only evidence of their lovemaking.

Tormund and Ygritte dismounted and Ygritte nocked an arrow in to her bow as they closed in on them.

By the time Jon's head shot up, they were already close enough to kill him. Ygritte aimed. The horse neighed and Raya turned around and an unexplainable look crossed her face. Jon stood up slowly.

"Ygritte, you know I didn't have a choice," Jon said plainly.

Tormund grit his teeth together. He wondered if that line would work on Raya when he chopped Jon down like he should have the day that he met him in Mance's tent.

"You always knew who I was," Jon continued softly, "what I am," he looked close to tears, "We have to go home now," he looked at a stunned Raya and then back at Ygritte, "And I know you won't hurt me."

Tormund cast a look at Ygritte, her arrow still aimed as she licked her lips, obviously on the verg of tears as well. Tormund understood. Jon? He could kill Jon. But Raya? Tormund would let her burn him alive first. He drew his sword. He wasn't going to torture Ygritte in to doing it.

"Tormund?" Raya's voice came out softly and Jon held a hand up to silence her.

"Stay where you are," he called back to her, "Tormund, I don't want to hurt you."

"Hurt me?" Tormund moved a little away from Ygritte, he took in his surroundings, he looked Jon up and down.

"And Ygritte I know you won't hurt me," Jon looked at her instead of Tormund.

"You know nothing, Jon Snow," Ygritte pulled her bow back further.

Jon scoffed, a sound that sounded like both pain and happiness.

"I know some things," Jon let his head fall back and he looked at the sky, "I know I love you," he paused and looked back down and at her, "I know you love me… but I have to go home now."

Tormund found his way in and waited. The boy was going to die. He would let him have this last moment with the woman he loved. He resisted looking at Raya any way necessary. Ygritte was crying now. Jon took a deep breath and he turned towards Raya and the horse. He started towards them and before Tormund could charge, Ygritte's arrow pierced throw his shoulder and he grunted and fell forward and in to the side of the horse.

"Jon!" Raya reached for him.

Ygritte nocked another arrow and Jon threw a leg over the side of the horse and hopped on to it. Tormund didn't have time for Ygritte's self doubt. He closed in on them quickly, running full speed. He saw another one of Ygritte's arrows fly by him and wedge himself in to Jon's leg. Jon picked up the horse's reins and Tormund reached them.

"Tormund!" Raya screamed his name and Jon sent the horse in to a gallop.

He had a two second window to drive his sword through Jon's chest. He wondered if his sword would go through Jon and hit Raya. That cost him a second. He didn't think about it. He ran beside the horse and reached, grabbing the first piece of clothing that belonged to her and yanking Raya Stark off of the horse. He braced himself for impact and she flew in to him, with a shriek. He looked up and at Jon who screamed his sister's name and dropped Raya to her feet quickly.

Tormund reached back and grabbed an ax.

"Leave me!" Raya warned her brother.

She turned to the side and saw Tormund change his stance

"Tormund!" she screamed his name and he cursed but let the thing fly from his grasp anyway, flying gracefully though the air and wedging its way in to Jon's shoulder.

"Jon!" Raya yelled his name.

"Raya!" Jon yelled before he slumped forward.

Raya looked at Tormund and then she looked over her shoulder at Ygritte who was still holding her nocked arrow as if frozen, tears streaming down her face. Raya didn't realize she was crying until the tears slid down her neck. She turned away from Tormund, fell forward on to her knees and began to throw up.

"Damn it!" Tormund stabbed his sword in to the ground, "DAMN IT!" he yelled again.

He'd had a chance. He had been able to end Jon, but he didn't want to risk Raya. He could have knocked Jon off the horse and ended him. He could have done something-anything. He hadn't. He had chosen to grab Raya. He had chosen to have Raya on the losing side instead of ensuring their victory with Jon's death. He'd chosen a few extra days with Raya over a lifetime of safety for his people. Jon had killed 4 people he called friends and he had let him go.

He tried to tell himself that he wasn't thinking clearly. He was lying.

He knew Raya would never forgive him for killing Jon. So, he hadn't. He was an idiot.

He paced slightly, his head leaned backwards, his eyes on the sky. He ran a hand through his hair and then he yanked his sword out of the ground and he walked away from the heap of tears that Raya was and towards the horses he and Ygritte had discarded.

Raya looked up and over at him and he didn't look back.

He mounted one of the horses and took off in the direction they had come from.

Raya clenched her stomach and she threw up again, her tears falling hot and quick. She tried to pull herself together. She dug her nails in to the wet ground and jumped when she felt a hand on her shoulder. Ygritte yanked her to her feet and looked out towards the direction Jon had vanished.

"He will live," she said simply.

Raya looked at Ygritte, their red eyes mirroring each other. Ygritte yanked Raya in and hugged her.

They both cried.


	21. Chapter 21

Raya sat.

She sat with her hands in her lap as Tormund and the other free folk gathered together. They spoke in hushed whispers, casting looks at her. She was excluded from their discussions. Ygritte was not. She stood beside Tormund, his large arm lugged over her shoulders. He was giving orders and everyone was listening intently. The group that had started off as 20 was now at 9. They had lost 5 climbing the wall. Jon had killed 5. And then Jon himself had left.

Raya took a deep breath when they set fire to the pile of bodies they had created. She resisted the urge to cry. She didn't feel that she had the right.

The free folk stood around the fire and they mumbled among themselves and one by one they started to leave the circle. Tormund and Ygritte stood there the longest, Ygritte began to cry, for more than one reason Raya assumed… and then, she left Tormund alone. He stood there with a blank look on his face, his gaze on the flicker of the fire. He touched his upper arm, the place Raya knew his gold bands rested. He took deep breaths as he stood and no one spoke to him. Slowly people began to sit down in different areas of the grassy area and they waited.

Tormund stood before the flames until the flames were almost engulfing ashes. Raya wondered if she was the only one worried about how he'd stood there so still for so long.

When he turned around, his gaze ran her over. He looked around at the remaining 8 people he had with him and he took a deep breath.

. "Orell and I had suspensions," he said finally, loudly, in a voice that quieted the whispers of the other wildlings, "So Mance has been getting information from me through Orell's bird," he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, "Jon only knows what we've told him," he opened his eyes again, "and since we've told him things we have changed many of those plans. Mance and some men are on their way to us. We hold until they reach us and we go forward as planned. Nothing has changed," he began to walk around the fire, "Nothing has changed," he repeated, "We are going to take the wall and Jon and his limited information will not cause us to fail."

"He killed five of our men on his own!" someone yelled out.

"He was raised in a noble home. He had training," Tormund scoffed, "but the rest of the crows do not have that practice. We outnumber them and we damn sure can outfight them."

"And the sister?" someone else asked.

"The sister," Tormund said tightly, "will not be a problem."

"We thought the same thing about the crow!" one of the three remaining women yelled.

"Aye," Tormund admitted, "but she hasn't hurt any of our own, not even when they fought her crow brother," Tormund looked around at the lot of them, "That counts for something."

"We welcomed Ygritte back for that same reason," Toregg, Tormund's eldest son spoke on her behave.

"He stuck his cock in the noble born and now he's blinded!" one of the men yelled, jumping to his feet, "He isn't fit to lead!"

Raya's head flew up and she looked around. Tormund stalked towards the voice and the free folk began to climb to their feet. Ygritte, Toregg, Torwynd and one other rushed to stand at Tormund's back while the other 3 people stood across from him. Tormund grabbed the man by his jacket and hoisted him slightly off his feet.

"Aye, you're right," he hissed, "I did," he yanked him closer, "and if you speak on my cock or the Stark again I'll smash your skull in," he dropped him to his feet, "and I'm not leading anyone. Mance is your leader," he spit at the man's feet, "Wait for your leader to lead you."

Tormund stalked off, hitting the man's shoulder with his own hard enough to look painful.

Raya diverted her eyes. She felt so many things.

Everyone seemed to gravitate in to separate places. The three people that had stood against Tormund settled down together away from everyone. Ygritte sat near the fire that burned, her eyes closed, her bow and quiver of arrows in her lap. Tormund's sons and the other man began to collect the bags that belonged to their fallen and then they all sat together to go through them in an attempt to take what they would still need.

Raya didn't belong. She felt like she didn't belong anyway. How could she? Her brother had just slaughtered five of their people and then taken off without a second thought. She had cost them lives and Tormund, the only person she'd thought that she could trust fully had wedged an ax in her brother's shoulder. She swallowed at the thought. Tormund had wanted to kill Jon and he was going to kill him. It didn't matter to him what Jon meant to her.

She thought about confronting him, but knew better than to push when he'd just defended her honor despite… everything.

She wondered if Jon was okay and if he would make it to Castle Black alright. She wondered how hurt he was. She prayed for him.

She had known that it would come to this. She couldn't understand why she was so emotionally fragile. She had known all along that Jon was a cro- man of the Night's Watch. She'd known Jon her entire life. She had known that he would never break an oath. She had known. But, here she was confused and hurt and alone. It had been only two nights earlier that she'd felt as if nothing could make her life all the better. And now, it had all crumbled down around her.

Her head jerked up at the sound of footsteps and Toregg addressed the free folk.

"We're moving. We need to find an area to set up camp. If rangers come across Jon Snow, this is the last place he's seen us. We can't camp here. Pack up and move out," he turned around and spoke to his brother who was at his back and then he began to collect his bags.

Raya pulled herself up.

 **A/N: Sorry about the little filer but I tried to transition this in to a different conversation and nothing sounded like it flowed properly in my head so I'll just start the new chapter with my transition piece and hope for the best. Thank you to all of you lovely people that have read, reviewed, favorited, or followed this fic. Thank you to the people that have made it this far and then decided this fic wasn't for you. I honestly appreciate ALL OF IT!**


	22. Chapter 22

_You must make a decision that you are going to move on. It won't happen automatically. You will have to rise up and say 'I don't care how hard this is. I don't care how disappointed I am. I'm not going to let this get the best of me. I'm moving on with my life. -unknown_

Seeing Ghost and River made Raya's heart swell with something like relief and happiness and love rolled all in to one. She scratched them behind the ears and they nipped at her playfully and she sat off to the side with them. She was not the most welcomed person, but it had been days since the incident and with Mance making an appearance and bringing along more free folk, people that only knew what Tormund and the others told them, she wasn't completely on the outside.

Men were more forgiving towards her. The spearwives were brutal. Raya took their glances and their remarks like slaps to her shoulder, something that left a sting but overall did not damage her. She waded alone mostly. Tormund's sons were fond of her. They checked on her and walked with her and took meals with her as did a handful of other men. It made her feel slightly worse. Jon had killed five of their people and they still did not harm her. People told her in passing that she couldn't be blamed for her brother's actions, but all the same, the majority of the free folks wanted nothing to do with her. She was okay with that. She understood.

She had hit understanding somewhere in her alone time. She understood why they were upset. She would have been livid had it been the other way, if Theon had killed northerners knowing that they had welcomed him in to their family despite his past and family history.

Raya Stark sat before the fire, a blanket thrown over her shoulders as everyone else laughed and talked and drank. She was always the last to rest and the first awake now. She made sure River and Ghost were always beside her. She did not fear that they would hurt the Free Folk. She feared that the Free Folk would attempt to hurt them and get killed in the attempt. She didn't need any more deaths related to her.

She rarely saw Ygritte but when she did she was sure they would both go deaf with the way both of their hearts shattered loudly in both sets of ears. Ygritte would offer her a smile and then go off to be with her people. Raya knew that she still loved Jon. She knew that Ygritte was trying to get back in to things. She was trying to get back to the way things had been before Jon had come along and pulled her world apart, wedged himself in to the smallest cracks in her armor and made himself seem so permanent and so whole.

Raya picked herself up and she snuck away and to her tent. She collapsed in a heap of unwanted emotions, but she did not cry. She laid unmoving and she thought. She thought herself in to a sadness that she knew would allow her no sleep and she waited for talking to die down. She waited for laughter to die in the air and for footsteps to stop becoming a common occurrence and then she headed back to the fire to be alone.

She stepped out from the trees and then she paused and her voice hitched in her throat. She looked at Tormund and he looked up and the back down as if his gaze falling on her met nothing. He looked down and at the flames as if she didn't exist and her heart rose in to her throat and she wasn't sure if she was pissed off or sad. She took a step backwards.

"Sit," his voice was low, commanding and Raya took the three steps that it took for her to sit down comfortably and Tormund looked up and at her, "You aren't eating enough," it was a simple observation thrown out as he picked at the fire between them and Raya looked at the flames.

"I am," Raya said quietly.

"Okay."

She looked up and she watched his eyebrows fiddle together before he threw some more wood in to the fire. He sat leaned forward, his elbows on his knee and his hands out before him, his fingers locked together. She opened her mouth and then closed it and then opened it again and sighed.

"Are you okay?"

It was a loaded question. The amount of people that hated him was less than those that hated her, but he was Tormund Giantsbane. He had been well respected. People had expected certain things from him.

"Yes," he answered softly and Raya nodded even though she knew he wasn't looking at her, "Are you?"

Raya thought about the question. She thought about the events that had taken place recently and the way her world had gotten shaken up yet again.

"What happened?" she ignored his question and hoped that hers said enough without her having to say it.

She wanted to know what had happened to her life and what had happened to Jon and what had happened to the two of them being one.

"Jon betrayed us like Orell knew he would," Tormund scoffed.

"Why are you and Ygritte being persecuted for that?" Raya dug her boot in to the dirt.

"We could have killed him," he ran a hand down his beard, "but we let him go. We put everyone in danger."

"You tried to stop him," it was blurted out and when Tormund's head snapped up and he looked at her, she swallowed the saliva that had deserted her dry throat.

"Do your really believe that, Stark?"

"I- I," Raya knew that she'd seen what she had but for some reason his tone made her question herself and she opened her mouth and blustered, "I was there and you- you hit him with an ax and you-"

"I hit him softer than I should have," he shook his head, "I didn't want to take his damned arm off, but I did want to knock him from that horse," Tormund took a breath as if to calm himself, "I didn't put enough strength behind that throw," he held her gaze, "I didn't want to kill your kin and now he's going to kill the lot of us," Tormund shook his head, "I put the way you would view me before my duty to my people and that can never happen again. I won't allow it," he climbed to his feet, "Eat more, Raya," it was a soft spoken whisper before he turned on his heels and he walked away from her.

Her heart was beating quickly and she blinked her eyes a few times before climbing to her feet.

She headed to Ygritte's tent with Ghost and River in tow and entered it without asking permission. Ygritte was tying a string around one of her arrows, but looked up when Raya entered all the same.

"What?" she said lazily.

"Tormund," Raya blurted his name instantly, "Did he hit Jon full force?"

"Raya, I'm not interested in your lover's quarrels."

"Can you just answer the damned question?" Raya's voice rose and Ygritte chuckled.

"No," she looked down at her arrow and finished her tying, "If Tormund would have hit Jon's arm full force he would have taken his arm off."

"Do you truly believe that?" Raya fell to her knees before Ygritte.

"Aye, just as I believe he could have killed Jon instead of yanking you from that horse," Ygritte shrugged, "but he chose you and now the two of you with pride's larger than mine dance around each other," Ygritte shook her head with a smile, "You are too proud to admit that you love him, even if he injured Jon and Tormund," Ygritte sighed, "He is too proud to admit that he has a weakness," Ygritte dropped her arrow to a stack and picked up another, "The two of you are idiots. Get out of my tent," she gestured to the flap, "I'm not kidding! Out you go, Stark!"

Raya hopped to her feet.

"Ygritte-"

"Out," she cut Raya off shortly.

"What if he has to kill Jon?"

"What if Jon has to kill him?"

Raya opened my mouth and Ygritte glared at her and pointed to the flap of her tent again and the Stark sighed.

"I am no healer of the heart," Ygritte called at Raya's back, "I can not tell you what to do or not to do. Tell yourself. Stop wading with your emotions, Stark. Choose something and stand beside your choice in failure and accomplishment."

Raya resisted the urge to look over her shoulder. She took a deep breath and she pushed herself out of the tent.

She returned to her own and this time she did sleep. She slept and she saw war and blood and Free Folk and men of the Night's Watch littering the snow all the same. She heard screaming and cursing and steel hitting steel and she woke up in sweat with not one clear choice in her mind, but she threw herself back in to the world of the Free Folk.

She was helpful when allowed and she didn't seclude herself and they noticed.

Mance noticed.

Ygritte noticed.

Tormund noticed.

 **LONG A/N: Soo my updates are extremely off and I apologize. I have a lot going on, however. I'm in the process of ATTEMPTING to publish an Urban Fiction novel. I read a series and reached out to an author who put me in to contact with their publisher and I need a finished work with original character obviously. So, I started working on my novel last month and I am officially 24 chapter in to a 44 chapter outline and it has been taking all of my time. I'm also a quarter of the way done with my poetry book and got a title LAST NIGHT that I'm super excited about. I'm just attempting to take every opportunity given to me. Of course FF is my first love and I will never just stop writing here, but my updates will be unpredictable until I finish this Urban Novel. It may be a flop and the publisher may hate it but I still owe it to myself to try. I love you all and I am SO THANKFUL for all of your love and support. Thank you to everyone that reads my work, favorites, follow, and/or reviews. I appreciate it all. Your reviews all make me smile and I get so excited when the email pop up on my phone and I just love you all soo much! Thank you for putting up with me!**


	23. Chapter 23

Jon Snow opened his eyes and he was surrounded by men, not Free Folk, no, but his brothers of the Night's Watch. He couldn't see them. His vision was blurred from something like lack of water or loss of blood. He could barely feel the ache in his back from being laid out on the icy ground. He took quick shallow breaths that inflated his lungs like balloons and caused a hiss to travel through his body with each exhale. He blinked his eyes a few times for clarity that never arrived as men around him called his name. He let his eyes fall shut and he took a longer breath and then opened it again. He clawed his way out of the fog and his mouth fell open.

"Pyp?" he blinked three quick times, "Sam?" he couldn't see them but he could hear them, loud and worried and there, near enough for him to reach out and touch them.

"Hush now," Sam cut him off, "You're home now."

Home. The word stretched in the air and Jon let his eyes close again, his will to fight gone. Home. Raya was off beyond the wall, likely to catch her death and he was here with his brothers. He thought about that. He thought about his arguments with his sister. She had claimed that the Free Folk just wanted to be safe from the long night. So, what did that mean for him? He had deserted his sister to stop women and children and the elderly from getting on to safer ground? His decision hadn't been a good one. He had chosen the Night's Watch over the lives of the Free Folk… over the life of Ygritte… of Raya. He beat the thought down and he felt his body convulse slightly.

Jon felt himself being lifted and he grunted out of pure pain.

He had taken an oath to these men. He had sworn certain things and when he had given up his name and title and family ties, but Raya was his sister and while he was a man of his word he loved her. He loved her and Arya and Robb and Rickon and Bran and even Gods awful Sansa. He couldn't take love and throw it in the flames of night and watch it disappear before his eyes. That wasn't how it worked.

Ned Stark was a man of honor and for the first time in all of his life Jon didn't think he knew his father very well. Ned Stark was a man who took oaths seriously, but he was also a man who valued family. Would Ned have left his sister to save Robert Baratheon and Jon Arryn? Jon thought about it. He thought about it long and he thought about it hard. If it came to his sister or thousands of people he would have chosen the thousands.

But was that what this was? Would the Free Folk kill thousands if they were allowed through the wall?

X

Tormund had noticed Raya taking a more active approach with his people. He was happy that she was starting to slide her way back in to the lives of the Free Folk. She didn't shoot him dirty glares anymore after their late night talk. She didn't speak to him much either. But, she was polite and civil, all that lady of a noble house training seeping in to the things that she did. She rarely unbraided her hair now and Tormund wasn't sure why he noticed that… but she was adapting.

Ygritte however was not. That girl was rage and anger and independence rolled up in a fury of red hair. She was doing everything she had done before but her temper was far worse. She wasn't present in her actions. She was going through the motions because it was expected and it made Tormund's hair on his arms stand up. He wondered if he would be moping that way if Raya had gone off. He didn't doubt it. Hell, she was a spit away and they weren't speaking or even looking at each other too often and he still found himself highly aware of her every move. He sighed thinking about it and then he paused in his walking and his thoughts.

He had followed her, Ygritte, and she sat on a rock more arrows then she needed laid out around her. She was cutting another one, a look of utter concentration on her face.

"What?" Tormund interrupted her thoughts, "Do you plan on killing all the crows on your own?"

"Do you plan on sitting around and scratching your balls till Winter?" she retorted back, not even looking up from her work

"We wait for Mance's orders," he reminded.

"You sent a man over the wall at a full moon. If he isn't back yet, he isn't coming back," she dropped her finished arrow and started another one.

"And what is it that you want?" he closed in on Ygritte and knelt in front of her, "You want us to march on Castle Black with just the lot of us here? Your pretty crow said," he took a deep breath and pinched his nose to calm himself before he said something he would never be able to take back, "Jon Snow said 1,000 men are resting there."

"Yeah, well he's a liar," her words came out like venom and she threw her arrow down and looked at Tormund for the first time since he'd spoken to her.

"You knew that he wouldn't break his oath," Tormund said gruffly, "You knew what he was when you fell in love with him."

"Aye and you knew Raya would stand with him but that didn't stop you. Now did it?"

"No, it didn't but I'm not sitting around moping when there is shit to be done!" his voice thundered, "I have loved, Ygritte. I had a wife who I loved more than air and when she died I thought I wouldn't live through it, but I did," he grabbed her by her arms, "You always live through it! Always!" he was shouting at her now and he realized he was holding her shoulders tightly but he couldn't get himself to let go, "So you get your ass up and you stand beside your people because you are a damned spearwife and if arrows and axes and swords can't take you down, neither can some damned words dressed up in fancy telling!"

Ygritte took a deep breath and she blinked, letting a few tears fall and she nodded.

"Fight for Raya," she said simply.

And three short whistles caused them both to jump to their feet. They looked around at the men above them from where they were in the valleys and they followed their movements. The lot of them had gathered together in a huddle and Tormund was able to spot Raya out of them without trying. He drew his sword and then cursed when he saw their intruder was no intruder at all.

"Thenns," he hissed to Ygritte, "I fucking hate Thenns."

He took in the Thenns' leader, Styr and resisted the urge to spit at the man's feet when they came face to face.

"Mance sent you?" Tormund checked and Styr grunted with a smirk, "How'd you find us?" he watched Styr gesture to their own warg, "You came from the south, not the north," it was a statement not a question and Tormund knew he would have to open his mouth and speak.

"Took a detour," he finally spoke, "and got some supper from a village down that way," he shrugged, "Why does the meat down here taste so much better than it does on our side of the wall?"

"Help yourself," Tormund gestured around to the food they'd gathered.

Styr chuckled and then walked to one of the flames. He lifted the stick and let it fall to the ground and he yanked the meat off.

"You didn't see us coming," Styr continued, "You lost your warg?" he looked around, "Ah and that baby crow that you had with you? You lost him too?" he smirked and Tormund took a deep breath.

"I'll answer to Mance," he growled, "I won't answer to you."

"She yours?" he motioned to Ygritte who Tormund had forget was beside him.

"I'm not for anybody," she snapped back and drew an arrow.

"Of course," Styr chuckled again, "Don't worry, love. You're too scrawny," he looked around again and Tormund knew when he saw Raya because his smiled spread across his face, "What about that one?" he pointed at Raya who stood firm, "Is she yours?"

"Yes," Tormund said dryly and Ygritte pointed her arrow at his throat, "We're married now."

"Married? Very nice," Styr chuckled and pushed Ygritte's arrow out of his face, "I took you for a man who liked his wives with more meat on their bones," he nudged Tormund as if they were old friends and then freed an arm from his bag, "Like the crows," he sighed as if content and then stabbed a stick through the arm and set it on the fire.

Tormund though of a wide arrangement of things to say, none of them good for the way they would need to work together so he bit his tongue.

"Stay out of my way," Tormund grunted and he turned his back to the cannibalism that was the Thenns.

X

Jon splashed his face with water. He was ready to be moving about. He could do nothing for Raya from his bed and he refused to let their separation for the second time be for nothing. He had to make good of something.

"Last time I saw my father was in the courtyard at Winterfell," he told Sam, who was standing at his door "He said 'Next time I see you, you'll be in all black.' I was jealous of Robb my whole life," Jon pulled a shirt over his head and winced from the pain that shot through him, "The way my father looked at him, I wanted that. He was better than me at everything: hunting and fighting and riding and," Jon shrugged, "math," he scoffed, "and girls," Jon thought back to the time he'd spent with Rob and sighed, "Gods, the girls loved him," he shook his head, "I wanted to hate him but I never could."

Jon pulled on his over shirt and began to button it.

"Sometimes I want to hate you," Sam offered and Jon looked at him over his shoulder, "Well, you're better than me at everything… except reading."

Jon chuckled.

"You're right about that," he admitted.

"Jon, your brother, Robb, he- he," Sam took a deep breath, "He isn't among the living anymore?"

Jon's smile fell and he paused in buttoning his shirt.

"Excuse me?"

"Jon-," Sam paused in his speaking and he pointed and Jon touched the area he was pointing at and quickly realized he was bleeding through his bandaging again, "Jon!" Sam said his name and Jon held up his hand to look at the blood coated on it.

His vision blurred. He felt himself sway lightly and then down Jon Snow went and blackness took over his vision.

 **A/N: Thank you to all of the positivity you guys are sending my way. I honestly appreciate it and all of your kinds words/thoughts. I just want to say thank you all for reading. Thank you for follows, favorites and reviews. Thank you to all of you lovely people who have made it this far and decided this fic just was not for you. I am grateful for it all!**


	24. Chapter 24

Tormund stood, leaned in to Raya, her back to a tree and he looked around her before looking over his shoulder. He had dragged her away as soon as he could. He partially needed to explain to her to keep her mouth shut and he partially just needed to be close to her. The contact seemed to calm him. She looked up at him and she took a quick breath that made him want to make her breathless in more ways than one.

He ignored the urge.

"In the way of the Free Folk we are married," Tormund said simply, "Jon was your kin and I took you from him. You haven't slit my throat in my sleep so I think that makes a union," he watched Raya open her mouth and decided to just cut her off, "Styr was looking at you like you were something to be eaten, very literally, I may add," he scoffed and shook his head, "I fucking hate Thenns," he growled under his breath, "and I said what was said and I stand beside it. Thenns have laws and lords and all of that frilly crap that they have on your side of your wall. They respect things like marriage," Tormund stood up a little and looked around Raya again, "when it suits them," he added.

"And you think it suits Styr?"

"He's a cunt and he likes to piss me off, but he won't cause that kind of trouble when he's decided to follow Mance to the wall. He can hold off on it."

"Why would someone like Styr follow someone else?"

"Mance beat the crap out of him three times."

"Styr?" Raya's eyes widened.

"Yes," Tormund said simply, "and he agreed to fall in line," he sighed, "Raya, stay out of Styr's way," he grabbed her chin in his hand, "please," he let his thumb trace across her cheek and resisted the urge to kiss her when her eyes fluttered shut, "for me."

"I'll try," Raya breathed, her eyes still shut.

"Swear it."

"I swear it," she opened her eyes and looked up at him, "to the Old Gods and the New."

Tormund nodded once and then they stood in silence. They stood in silence and they breathed.

"Raya-"

"Thank you," she blurted and Tormund was genuinely caught off guard and his face showed such an emotion, "for sparing Jon," she clarified, "I- You-," she cleared her throat, "It means a lot to me and thank you."

Tormund nodded once.

"If I come face to face with that boy again and he draws a sword I am going to cut him down like a damned tree," he watched Raya close her eyes and take a breath, "but that doesn't mean I don't care about you, Stark. It's self preservation."

"I know," her voice came out quietly and Tormund lifted her chin more firmly.

"That doesn't mean that I don't care about you," he repeated.

Raya nodded in to his hand and he leaned in to her as if out of his control. He leaned down and he prepared for the contact that had begun to litter his waking and sleeping hours all the same and when Raya turned her head to the side he planted the kiss meant for her lips to the side of her head and then he sighed and released her face. He took a step back and Raya dug her shoe in to the ground.

"I'm sorry," she put her stray strands of hair behind her ears, "Tormund-"

"It's okay little Stark," he chuckled and held his hands up, "It's okay," he repeated and he took another step backwards, "Just be careful around the Thenns."

She nodded and Tormund headed off and in to the trees without another word. Raya almost called after him… almost. But instead she pulled her hair free and she took a deep breath and she made her way back to camp where she collapsed in front of a small fire and tried to gather her thoughts.

She was wedged between several men, many of them common faces she had seen several times over and the others strange; Thenns. She pretended not to notice. She spoke to the people that spoke to her and she quickly realized that she appreciated the dark humor of the Thenns, despite what Tormund said.

She thought that it was disgusting that they ate people. It was savage and horrible, but she had learned quickly on this side of the wall not to speak on things that she did not understand. While they did, in fact, eat people they were also the only clan that had laws and lords and regulations. They were both the most savage and the most developed. They were the only clan that could manipulate bronze and they were some of the most disciplined and skilled killers on this side of the wall. That was interesting.

Her heart dropped when she realized a member of the Thenn clan was looking at her, his arm brushing against hers.

"What?" she looked at him and her thoughts fell apart.

"Tormund's wife?" he checked.

"Raya," she nodded once.

"Sigorn," he responded and then he looked back ahead to speak to someone in front of them.

He didn't speak to her for the rest of the night.

X

Sigorn looked like his father. He was tall and lean and clear shaven and bald with grey eyes and a straight nose. He wore bronze scale armor and a helm and had a weirwood spear with a bronze head that he never moved without.

Raya noticed him.

He noticed Raya.

And Tormund noticed the two of them noticing each other.

Raya was not smitten with Sigorn in the slightest. She simply appreciated that he was everything that Tormund was not. There was nothing wrong with Tormund, but she didn't need to be reminded of him and Sigorn was his parallel opposite in appearance and in the way he carried himself. Sigorn carried himself above every one else, whereas Tormund was seemingly friendly with everyone he came across… except the Thenns.

Sigorn appreciated that Raya merely existed. She didn't waver under his gaze and she didn't seem deterred by the fact that his father, Styr had laid out a body part on a flame before her and her people… if he could consider them her people. They didn't seem fond of her. He appreciated that she didn't speak until spoken to.

They sat side by side in silence for a total of five nights.

They just seemed to gravitate that way. They never initially started the night side by side. It would be late in the night before they ended up beside each other. Sigorn would greet her as 'Tormund's wife' and Raya would respond with 'Sty's son' and that was where their conversations ended normally… until it didn't.

Raya was sure that she was hearing things when Sigorn looked at her long and hard and then spoke.

"They tell me you're a warg. Are you?" his gaze burned in to the side of her head and she turned to take the onslaught straight on.

"Maybe," she wasn't sure if she was supposed to tell anyone about her gift.

"Is that why Tormund married you? To secure a warg after they lost the last one?"

"Maybe," she would never say that Jon was her brother and that he had killed the last one and that Tormund was forced to marry her by technically stopping her from an escape she wanted no parts in.

"Is that all you can say?

"Maybe," Raya smirked at his amused tone and Sigorn chuckled but then turned back to other people and Raya found herself starring at his side profile.

X

Jon woke up with a headache that he knew was not from blood loss. He couldn't very well deal with this. He had gone on the wrong side of the wall. He had fallen in to the bed with Ygritte why his father and brother were being beheaded. His father's wife was killed. His unborn niece or nephew and the sister-by-law he never knew had been killed. Sansa was to wed Joffrey the little cunt. Bran and Rickon were prisoners in their own home and Arya… Arya was nowhere to be found.

Jon closed his eyes and he took a deep breath. Bran and Rickon were children. They were prisoners of war in their own home, Bran bedridden. He had caused all of this. He had left them all unattended. If he hadn't sworn the black he would have been left to guard Winterfell under the guise of watching the two youngest Starks. He would have killed Theon. If it came to Rickon and Bran or Theon, he would have killed him with no hesitation. Theon. Jon clenched his jaw. He had thought Theon close to him. They had been outcasts together. Jon unclenched his jaw. They were nothing alike.

If he wasn't at the wall he could have given Robb advice. He could have talked him in to… nothing. Jon killed the thought instantly. He would never be able to get Robb to hide the woman he loved and he would never have been able to talk Robb out of marrying that woman. He could have done something.

He could have saved him… or at least died at his side.

Jon took a deep breath that made his shoulder ache and he sat up in his bed. He rubbed his am and groaned at the feeling. Tormund and Ygritte had really done a number on him. They had both chosen not to kill him. He knew that it was a choice. He had watched Ygritte shoot animals yards and yards away in their very eye. She could have killed him if she wanted to. And Tormund… he loved Raya and that was beginning to look like a blessing. While his family fell apart and in to the hands of people who could hurt them, Raya was left with Tormund who would die before something happened to her… and he planned on betraying them.

Jon fell back in to his bedding. Ned and Robb and Arya were gone. He had Sansa and Rickon and Bran who were prisoners and he had Raya… rough around the edges and strong willed… and free. Raya was the only one of them that was free and for the first time ever he was thankful for that.

He closed his eyes.

He prayed that she stayed that way.

He thought about Rickon and Bran and he thought about if he could help the free folk and get them to help Winterfell but he knew it would never be more than a thought. They would never get involved in northern politics and he couldn't very well get them through the wall if they did agree. That wasn't his choice and he would be on trial for his own betrayal soon enough. The Night's Watch would pass judgement on him for the killing of a brother and for the lying down he'd done with Ygritte.

He touched the bandage on his leg instinctively. The head of the arrow hadn't even gone in all the way.

He missed her, Ygritte, who hadn't killed him even when he'd shattered her heart.

X

Tormund threw back some ale and laughed at his idiot sons. They were amusing to no end. Toregg and Torwynd agreed on very little and their argument of the night was an idiotic pursuit that neither of them wanted to cave in on. He watched, seated beside Ygritte who was attempting to be around living, breathing people.

She seemed to be finding her way back and even if she was faking it Tormund was just happy that she cared enough to even try to fake it. She and Raya seemed to be adapting.

Raya.

She was a common occurrence around Toregg who doted on her to no end and surprisingly enough, Sigorn. She was not liked by spearwives but it seemed that the male population of the free folks accepted her no matter what clan they happened to come from.

He paused, his smile on his lips when he heard it, Raya's laugh. He resisted the urge to look in her direction and when she spoke again he knew that the light chuckled that followed belong to Sigorn.

Tormund focused on the conversation before him even when he knew Ygritte was staring at him. She nudged him lightly and he pretended not to notice.

He had talked to Raya. He had told her that they were married… in a way… and she had shown him that she needed more time. He would never attempt to pressure her in to something. He knew that he wanted her. That was simple. He also knew that he had all but taken her kin's arm off and while he understood that it was a necessity and he very well knew that any spearwife would agree, he also knew that Raya was not a spearwife. She was raised differently and if she wanted to shun him that was her decision.

That did not mean that he would not be keeping an eye on her. It just meant that he was giving her the freedom to make her own decisions. Even if they were in an intentional union, on this side of the wall Raya Stark was a free woman. She was free to converse and laugh with whoever she damn well pleased.

He simply had to remind himself of that… often.

X

Raya ran her hands through her hair as she dipped it in to water. Her hair was an oily mess that she could do absolutely nothing with. She dipped it again and then rung it out before running her fingers through the tangled mess that it was yet again. She sighed and leaned back on the rock she was seated on.

Ghost and River lapped up water as she watched and attempted to pat her hair in to submission. The tie she had been using had finally given out and she was irritated beyond measure.

She spun around and nearly rolled her eyes when Signor entered the clearing. He had become a sort of friend, a protector even. They talked rarely, but they did communicate. He shook his head no when people of his clan approached her as if they would harm her and they reneged almost instantly. He sat beside her on purpose now and although he rarely spoke when not spoken to, he spoke to her, when they were alone anyway and to Raya that was quite an accomplishment.

He looked at her, up and down and up again and he smirked and Raya flung her hair back and shot him a look. He simply shrugged in return. She was learning to talk to him without talking. He walked over and he grabbed a piece of her hair and lifted it.

"My hair tie is no longer of use," she said simply.

Signor shook his head as if he couldn't believe she had said such a foolish thing. And then, he freed a dagger and grabbed a piece of cloth. Raya watched him cut away one strip expertly and then he collected her hair and quickly braided it, tying the thin strip of cloth in to a sort of knot at the end.

Raya flipped her braid over her shoulder.

"Thank you."

He raised an eyebrow and then collapsed beside her. He ran a hand over River, who had taken quite a liking to him. Raya scratched behind Ghost's ear for him to not fall in to jealousy and they sat in silence. They did that often.

"Why Tormund?" was Signor's question of the day.

He typically asked one to two and answered only one for Raya in return.

"Why Tormund what?" Raya feigned confusion and Signor shot her a look, "He makes me a better me," she watched Signor roll his eyes, "Tormund set me free," she tried again, "He sees me as strong and independent and he believes that I can handle myself and does not belittle me when I can not."

"Hm," Signor grunted, "He dislikes me."

"You think so?" Raya thought about it.

From what she could understand he disliked all Thenns but she didn't think that was appropriate to say.

"He thinks I'm smitten with you," Signor began to scratch River, "It's hilarious really."

"Have you ever been in love?" Raya asked softly.

"No."

"Would you like to?"

"No."

"Why not?" Signor shrugged, "Do you eat people like your father?" she decided to press her luck.

Signor smirked and then he stood to his feet without answering. She watched him shed his shirt and then his pants and she averted her eyes until she heard the splash that meant he had leaped in to the water. She looked back at him, his body covered.

"You aren't going to answer, are you?" she checked and then chuckled when he dunked his head beneath water and then popped back up, "Your father is a cunt," she added.

"He is," Signor agreed and then Raya watched him dunk his head again, "The free folks told me of your brother's actions and Tormund letting him run off," Sigorn looked at her and slightly tilted his head to the side, "I won't share that with my father," he said to Raya's shocked expression, "The two of you don't talk much and avoid the other's touch at all cost," he smirked knowingly, "but he watches you when he thinks you won't notice."

"He does?" Raya asked a little to excitedly and Sigorn raised an eyebrow eloquently.

"You aren't his normal type."

"Excuse me?"

"Tormund," he clarified.

"And why is that?"

"You tell me, warg."

Raya opened her mouth and then closed it.

"Goodnight, Signor,"

"Are the two of you really married?" was his second question.

"We are," Raya agreed.

"Hm," Sigorn looked around absently, "Sleep well Wife of Tormund," he said simply.

"Son of Styr," she retorted back and Sigorn winked and then turned his back to her.

Raya nodded once at that and then called for River and Ghost and made her way back to camp.

She held open the flap of her tent for them to file in and then she went in search of Tormund.

She missed him. She truly did. She missed his loud booming voice and she missed that laugh that accompanied almost every sentence and the way he folded himself in half so that he could be closer to her height to speak to her. Being around Signor was a reminder of what people that were not Tormund were like. She found herself justifying his actions because she missed him so much. Jon would be fine. Ygritte said it and Tormund said it and she had seen him ride off. He had to be fine. Tormund had chosen not to kill him. That had to stand for something. It just had to mean something. He had given her what little he could, given the situation.

She found him with his sons. They had all gathered together in his tent and when she walked in, it was Toregg that smiled at her and hit her on the back with more force than necessary.

"Tormund," she said his name softly and took a deep breath.

And when he turned around she crashed in to his arms without an explanation and he hugged her back without asking for one.

X

Tormund woke up with Raya in the crook of his arm, her back flat against the ground, one of her hands thrown out to the side and the other lifted in to his hair.

She had crashed in to him and he had hugged her and she had cried. She had cried and he had let her and his sons had excused themselves and quickly left the two of them alone and Tormund had mentally prepared himself for a complicated talk that never came.

It was Raya that initiated their kiss and it was Raya that led them in to the lovemaking that had followed after, an achingly slow process that had ended when she'd began to shake and collapsed in to him.

And now they were here.

He took her in and he propped himself up on one of his arms. He looked around his tent. River and Ghost had found their way inside and they each laid on either side of the flap. He didn't bother with shooing them away. He looked down at Raya, her eyes shut lightly and he took in the way her chest moved up and down.

They were fixed.

He hoped they were fixed that was.

He pushed her hair back and out of the way and he took in her face. He touched her cheek and he let his hand travel up to her hairline and then he stroked back down the side of her face. He rubbed her cheek with his thumb. She had relatively small ears ad he let his pointer finger trace the curve. He touched her eyebrows and her slightly pointed nose. She was beautiful. She amazed him. Tormund ran a finger over her still plump lips and he paused when Raya broke in to a grin. He lifted an eyebrow when her eyes fluttered open.

"How long have you been awake?" he checked.

"A while," she yawned.

"You could have stopped me."

"You were enjoying yourself," she stretched lazily.

"I was studying your face," Tormund said gruffly.

"You were tracing my face," she shot back.

"Aye," he smiled down at her and Raya returned the gesture before sitting up quickly, planting a kiss to his lips and then rolling on to her stomach.

"Are we okay?" she asked simply and Tormund ran his finger tips from the back of her neck down to her waist and then stretched his hand across the skin there.

"If you say we are," he leaned down and kissed the back of her shoulder.

"You aren't mad at me?" she checked.

"No."

She nodded and Tormund planted another kiss to her shoulder. She looked up at him, set a hand on his chest and pushed lightly. He collapsed on to his back.

"If you were not forced to marry me do you think it would have happened one day anyway?"

"I reckon it would have," Tormund looked straight up at the top of his tent while Raya watched his face.

"If Styr did not ask you about me would you have even acknowledged the possibility that it was done already?"

"I don't know," Tormund sighed and then he thought about his answer, "No," he decided truthfully.

"Had the thought that we were possibly married even crossed your mind?"

"Yes."

"And you would have told me nothing?"

"Nothing," he repeated, "Maybe once you forgave me."

Raya nodded once at that.

"So when the Thenns are gone-"

"You will still be mine and I will still be yours," Tormund looked at Raya and she turned on to her side and tucked herself in against him, "You are a wife, Raya," he tucked her hair behind her ear, "my wife."

"So when the wall is crossed are you to reside in the north?"

"With your family?" he tested.

"Yes," she reached up and placed her hand in his hair, "with Winterfell."

"Am I expected to call you Lady Stark and wear the stupid clothing that noble men wear on that side of the wall?" Tormund chuckled.

"Oh yes of course," Raya sat up suddenly and clapped her hands together under her face, "You can obtain a squire," she smiled widely.

"Aye, we'll get someone to fetch our food and cook it."

"We have to get married all over again!" Raya laughed, "At the Godswood. That's the only for it to be done, you know?"

"I have to obtain a cloak for the ceremony."

"Your sons can stand in to represent you."

Tormund laughed loudly and Raya joined him. The things that had once seemed to be certain in her life and the way she lived it out seemed so trivial now. Raya collapsed back atop Tormund and they laughed a little longer. Raya thought about her mother. Cat would surely lose her mind when she realized her eldest daughter had married a man with no title and no lands, a free man of all people.

Raya cared little about that. They slept in tents and moved daily. She was content with that. And they could build their own home. Tormund was very resourceful and she was sure she would be granted land for her union even if it was an extremely small amount. That was all that they needed. She could care less about having a large household. She held no care about how large her home was or how powerful.

"Raya-" Tormund paused when they heard a slight bustle somewhere outside and he tilted his head to the side and listened while he climbed to his feet.

Raya watched him yank on his trousers and collect his ax. She clicked her tongue twice and watched River and Ghost hop up and head to her. Tormund started towards the front of his tent and Raya scrambled to get up and pull on her clothes. She dressed as quickly as possible while Tormund yanked on his top.

She sat back on the ground and crossed her legs and she looked at River. They locked eyes. For the first time in many moons, Raya Stark warged and ran out of Tormund's tent before he could object.

 **A/N: Fun Fact- This has been written for three whole days but I battled with myself on whether to post it or not. Lol. I appreciate you all and I am forever thankful that you lovely people continue to read my work. I feel so blessed to be able to share the rambles that happen in my brain with people that not only accept them, but support them as well. All of my love to you!**


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